# the dumbest insults you've ever heard thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 15, 2001, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423 "2001-11-15T00:33:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2001, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423/21 "2001-11-15T22:07:44Z")
I got called a snob. That is so completely counter to everything about me that it was not only dumb, but funny. ---
**Author:** ![fish\_in\_the\_sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7ba0ec/32.png) [@fish\_in\_the\_sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fish_in_the_sky)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2001, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423/22 "2001-11-15T22:25:42Z")
A friend and I were trading mock insults one day in high school, and I threatened her with this gem: “I swear, I will kick your ass so hard you won’t even recognize it.” She kinda giggled & said, “I don’t think I could recognize it now.” [sub](This incident added to our repitoire of inside jokes - when we would talk on the phone & one would ask the other what she was doing, she would reply, “I’m just looking at my own ass.” Or “I’m admiring my ass” or “I’m staring deeply into my ass.” or… well, you get the point.)[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Kalashnikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/2bfe46/32.png) [@Kalashnikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalashnikov)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2001, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423/23 "2001-11-15T22:40:24Z")
I’ll bet a lot of us have been called a geek… as if that was a **bad** thing. ---
**Author:** ![My\_Darn\_Snake\_Legs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f14d63/32.png) [@My\_Darn\_Snake\_Legs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/My_Darn_Snake_Legs)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2001, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423/24 "2001-11-15T22:41:02Z")
I think that the lamest insult that has ever been aimed at me was something to the effect of: “well, you have sharp teeth…” Umm…so what? No one else has ever complained. They’re called “incisors.” Look it up. Geesh :rolleyes: –==the sax man==– ---
**Author:** ![My\_Darn\_Snake\_Legs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f14d63/32.png) [@My\_Darn\_Snake\_Legs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/My_Darn_Snake_Legs)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2001, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423/25 "2001-11-15T22:46:26Z")
So sue me. I’m a philosophy major. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2001, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423/26 "2001-11-15T23:48:13Z")
The following exchange between my brother and youngest sister: Bro: Stop acting like an idiot! Sis: Who’s acting?? Still cracks me up after all these years. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423/27 "2001-11-16T01:20:23Z")
My ex-roommate used “English Major” as an insult. What-ever. ---
**Author:** ![milo\_minderbinder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecb155/32.png) [@milo\_minderbinder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/milo_minderbinder)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2001, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423/28 "2001-11-19T17:10:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Anubis \* > \*\*Okay… > **milo\_minderbinder** , are you Irish? Do you know what Amadaun means? \*\* Nah, I’m Scottish - just a [sneaky cheat.](http://homepage.tinet.ie/~nobyrne/a.htm) 😉 ---
**Author:** ![manwithaplan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f1d935/32.png) [@manwithaplan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manwithaplan)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2001, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423/29 "2001-11-19T17:45:47Z")
My friend was accusing someone of cowardice and said “you’re a chicken - quack, quack”. (Maybe you had to be there.) BTW, it’s amadán (not that it really matters). ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2001, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423/30 "2001-11-19T17:56:40Z")
A local radio personality was droning on about a local politico who was seemingly disliked non-whites. The insult?.. “every time he opens his mouth, another racial epitaph:confused: comes out!” Another one… A local bar was having a “Trivia Contest” night. One could win t-shirts, free beer, etc. I answered correctly twelve questions in a row. My friend’s girlfriend was getting peeved that I got so many correct while she was faltering. On question #13, I faltered and couldn’t even guess at an answer. The exchange went like this… Me- I don’t know. Her- AH HA! YOU don’t know! Me- Nope, not a clue! Her- See?! Me- Huh? 😕 Her- You’re not as smart as you think! Yeah, I know. It would have been WAAAAY too easy to recover from THAT last stinging remark, but I took the high road instead. ---
**Author:** ![Podkayne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Podkayne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Podkayne)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2001, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423/31 "2001-11-19T21:09:06Z")
“You know, you’re not impressing anybody.” _blink, blink_ What makes you think I’m trying to impress anyone? Oh, wait, I see now . . . _your_ pitiful life revolves around choosing every word, every stitch of clothing, every last detail to impress your half-wit worthless friends, and you are incapable of grasping the fact that someone might like to do a good job at something they enjoy for reasons of personal pride and satisfaction. [sup]\*[/sup] [sup]\*[/sup] This worldly and self-confident reply is precisely _not_ the way I responded in my freshman year of high school. As I recall, I just muttered, “Gimme back my paper or I’ll tell Mrs. G-------.” However, I happened to meet this same young man in the dining hall during my sophomore year of college. We ate lunch together, and he asked my major, and, cringing, waiting for the insult, I told him. He sighed sadly, and said, “That’s so cool. You actually know what you want to do with your life. I’m just majoring in government because I can’t think of anything better to do.” So, take heart, teenaged Dopers. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. I was called “cool” by the meanest boy in my high school. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-dumbest-insults-youve-ever-heard-thread/93423.md?page=1)