# The eleventh commandment

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-eleventh-commandment/779431>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [February 10, 2017, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-eleventh-commandment/779431 "2017-02-10T00:54:23Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 3\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Weisshund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ba8739/32.png) [@Weisshund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weisshund)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2017, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-eleventh-commandment/779431/21 "2017-02-11T18:43:45Z")

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> [@Navigator66](#):
>
> But, I always kept to the Eleventh Commandment: Thou shall never, never, ever get caught.
> 
> Served me very well over my life.

Thou shalt always get caught, thou mayest just not know when.  
But the longer it is, the worse she will make you pay.  
And yes, i may have to side with two many cats  
well actually i have to slightly disagree with cats as to the subtype or jerk

Narcissistic Self Fulfilling Jerk, assuming truth since i can neither prove nor disprove what you say.

No lecture, that would be about as useful as lecturing a heroin addict

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**Author:** ![Weisshund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ba8739/32.png) [@Weisshund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weisshund)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2017, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-eleventh-commandment/779431/22 "2017-02-11T18:59:34Z")

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> [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#):
>
> Slacker. There are 613 commandments we Jews must follow.

Yes, but those are gifts, and the big 10 are part of those 613.

Us Goyim, we only got 7.  
I dunno, Noah was cheap and he only bought us the basic subscription package?

Anyways, we can not do the 613 mitzvah, i would not say it is not allowed, but that  
it is useless and means nothing, because we would be doing them not out of obedience or part of our side of the promised agreement, it would be because We decided, and We chose to rather than because He asked.

So, yea, you guys got all the good stuff, all the extended gift package stuff.  
Thank him we are still allowed bagels lox and corned beef though.

Now, if you could please direct some more of your Jewish brethren to florida?  
I can find Cuban Mexican Jamaican Tai Chinese and Japanese, every place, you think i can find one good Jewish deli? No  
Cant even find a good pickle ☹  
_apologies for hijacking the jerk thread_

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**Author:** ![Navigator66](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/43a26b/32.png) [@Navigator66](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Navigator66)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2017, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-eleventh-commandment/779431/23 "2017-02-11T20:04:32Z")

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They say, with age and experience, if your lucky, comes a little wisdom. So, I’ll just leave those gauntlets lie where they are, smoke some more ganja, and listen to the calming voices in my head.

Besides, the Widow Jones just called, she coming over in a bit with a plate of warm, homemade chocolate chip cookies. She likes the ganja too, always makes her frisky.

Note to self: DO NOT get so stoned before she gets here and forget where you put the blue boner pills, like you did last time.

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