# The ENORMOUS HOMOSEXUAL TAKEOVER thread.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [April 18, 2001, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383 "2001-04-18T02:55:14Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![andygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@andygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andygirl)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/1 "2001-04-18T02:55:14Z")

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My rainbow comrades in arms,

The time is now. Our plot to take over the so-called “straight” dope has been exposed.

[http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=67844](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=67844)

We must now attack before it is too late.

Go, infiltrate the threads. Post with reckless abandonment. Are they talking about movies? Deaths in the family? Dopefests? The Sapir-Worf hypothesis? It doesn’t matter, because you’re _ **gay, gay, gay!** _

Men, I want your lisps up to standards. Women, make sure the lines on your mullets are wonders to behold.

We shall take over to a tasteful disco beat, augmented by woman power chants. Potluck is at 9 pm CST.

We’re here. We’re queer. Nobody is safe.

-ENORMOUSLESBIAN

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**Author:** ![reprise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@reprise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/reprise)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/2 "2001-04-18T03:08:28Z")

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but I’d hate to offend anyone by forcing my bisexuality on posters in threads which don’t “pertain” to me 😉

To hell with showtunes, I’m gonna go play Piaf now.

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**Author:** ![Lucki\_Chaarms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lucki\_Chaarms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucki_Chaarms)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/3 "2001-04-18T03:41:06Z")

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Taking my pink triangular shield in hand, and raising a strangely phallic spear above my head, I go charging into the boards.

Back I say! You there, talking about cars… take this thilly! Yeeha!

You there! Discussing the latest Onion jokes… look at my big bad thpear! Yeaaah!

You! The one yammering about your child… we’re queer and we don’t like Jethuth! Hahaha!

Feel my thting!

MarxBoy

* * *

Perhaps Harriet should have said “Oh mother nature, what a sex maniac you are!” as she was actually gazing down at a reproductive battlefield.

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**Author:** ![Mercutio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/51bf81/32.png) [@Mercutio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mercutio)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/4 "2001-04-18T03:44:43Z")

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**Marxy** , that was so funny I shit my pants.

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**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/5 "2001-04-18T04:20:17Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by andygirl \*  
> \*\*My rainbow comrades in arms,
> 
> The time is now. Our plot to take over the so-called “straight” dope has been exposed.  
> \<snip\>  
> We’re here. We’re queer. Nobody is safe.  
> \*\*

I got called a “fag” in that thread. Does this at least qualify me to be a henchman for you or Esprix or someone after the revolution comes?

What if I admit to knowing all the lyrics to Liza Minnelli’s first musical “Flora The Red Menace” by heart, even the song about how Flora belives in “Free Milk For Kids (because she’s a communist)”?

I didn’t think so. Sniff.

Fenris, always on the outside looking in at all the cool kids and their revolutionary plots. \<sigh\>

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**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/6 "2001-04-18T04:23:55Z")

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[sub]What about us lonely bi guys? Those of us who don’t have lisps or mullets or dress in all black or have inexplicable affinity for shows or women’s tennis?[/sub]

I have it. I will start recruiting over at TMF. They’ve already got a “Gay, Out, Loud, Proud” forum. I think I’ll start recruiting at “Atheist Fools” as some of them also lurk and post a bit in “Christian Fools”.

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**Author:** ![Lucki\_Chaarms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lucki\_Chaarms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucki_Chaarms)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/7 "2001-04-18T04:28:36Z")

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Hey **iamphuna** I’m a bi guy too. I just play it up.

Go for it, have fun. Bi now, gay later, right?

Yeah, that’s what I thought. The pink triangles are located at the back of the room. Grab yourself a Depeche Mode tape from the table and let’s roll.

MarxBoy

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**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/8 "2001-04-18T04:38:51Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by MarxBoy \*  
> Go for it, have fun. Bi now, gay later, right?  
> \*\*

Oh, honey, you have no idea. I just spent tonight hanging out with, among other people, two really cool gay men. One in his 30s, another I have no idea but damn he’s hot. And of course I flirted with the latter because the former was unavailable. This man makes black look like a gift from the Fairy Queen of Fashion (and you KNOW it’s a queen, dear!).

God, I love flirting with men. It’s so liberating. Especially to be able to do it around my mother. Weirds her out a bit, but only because she’s not used to it.

So, MarxBoy, how late you gonna be here?

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**Author:** ![MrVisible](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@MrVisible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrVisible)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/9 "2001-04-18T04:41:38Z")

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Umm… actually, I’m not an enormous homosexual. I’m kinda big, but I’ve lost some weight lately. I’ve been told it looks good on me…

Dammit, my ass just looks too fat to take over any threads tonight.

Maybe next week, though…

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**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/10 "2001-04-18T06:00:06Z")

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I bow to the will of the masses.

To quote a famous homosexual from _Blazing Saddles_, “Let’s get 'em!”

Esprix

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**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/11 "2001-04-18T06:06:36Z")

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Up in the air - it’s a bird! -it’s a plane! -es una mariposa! - No, it’s…

_ **Superfaggot!** _

:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:  
…🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒…  
…:):):):)…  
…:p:p:p…  
…:eek::eek:…  
…😕…

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**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/12 "2001-04-18T06:34:49Z")

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Able to leap tall theaters in a single skip!

:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:  
…🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒🆒  
…;);););););)😉  
…:):):):):)🙂  
…:p:p:p:p:p  
…:D:D:D:D  
…:(:(☹  
…:eek::eek:  
…😕

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**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/13 "2001-04-18T06:42:12Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by matt\_mcl \*  
> \*\*Up in the air - it’s a bird! -it’s a plane! -es una mariposa! - No, it’s…
> 
> _ **Superfaggot!** _  
> \*\*

Now, what would SuperFaggot’s powers be, exactly?

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**Author:** ![Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_griffin-kentzel/32/14787_2.png) [@Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Griffin-Kentzel)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/14 "2001-04-18T07:00:31Z")

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Hahahahahaha . . . touché, **MarxBoy**!

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**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/15 "2001-04-18T07:41:41Z")

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Gay Agenda International is behind you, GIRLFRIEND!

Let’s get 'em.

Hit 'em where it hurts…

Let’s redecorate their houses in 1970’s colors!

I see a lot of Burnt Orange, Harvest Gold, and Avacado Green in some people’s futures…

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**Author:** ![Redboss](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8baadc/32.png) [@Redboss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Redboss)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/16 "2001-04-18T08:44:45Z")

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dearest **andygirl** , my captain and lezzo good-looker, I **Redboss** will accept your challenge.

Which nobody will remember, because it’s only in the OP.

> [@](#):
>
> We must now attack before it is too late.
> 
> Go, infiltrate the threads. Post with reckless abandonment. Are they talking about movies? Deaths in the family? Dopefests? The Sapir-Worf hypothesis? It doesn’t matter, because you’re gay, gay, gay!

I promise to post thirty times in the next thirty days in an **extremely inappropriate manner** to all kinds of threads, and will mention that I am gay, gay gay!

My first target tonight was [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=1264866#post1264866)

Look out for me, and join me!

[brief sober thought] Or will it just piss everybody off too much? [/brief sober thought]

Redberet

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**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 9:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/17 "2001-04-18T09:13:04Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Hastur \*  
> \*\*Let’s get 'em.
> 
> Hit 'em where it hurts…
> 
> Let’s redecorate their houses in 1970’s colors!
> 
> I see a lot of Burnt Orange, Harvest Gold, and Avocado Green in some people’s futures… \*\*

No…please, dear God, _no_…

You _bastard_…avocado green is a sin against God, an abomination, and you shall be smoten for it!

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**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 9:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/18 "2001-04-18T09:25:37Z")

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All you thespians need to git! And if there’s any of those people out there who’ve had an operation on their private parts to change 'em into the other kind of private parts – you know, “transformers” – then you need to git, too!

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**Author:** ![Lucki\_Chaarms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lucki\_Chaarms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucki_Chaarms)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/19 "2001-04-18T13:28:41Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Snooooopy \*  
> \*\*  
> Now, what would SuperFaggot’s powers be, exactly?  
> \*\*

Well, he can slap the shit out of anything that moves in like 2 seconds flat, he can skip at super speeds, etc.

But his real powers… well have you seen Boogie Nights? Remember the end? Yeah. _that’s_ a super power.

Also, by manipulating the space-time continuum, he can watch up to 12 broadway shows in ONE NIGHT!

They say his powers come from a mysterious source he calls his “Spirit Sprinkles”

MarxBoy

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**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\
**Post date:** [April 18, 2001, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383/20 "2001-04-18T13:55:38Z")

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May I please be a lipstick lesbian? Or an historical lesbian, so I can keep my enterprising frocks? I can be Elsie de Wolf, or Alla Nazimova, or Agnes Moorehead . . . NOT Gertrude Stein, please . . .

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-enormous-homosexual-takeover-thread/62383.md?page=2)
