# The ex-felon vs the two drunk douchebags **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 15, 2011, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696 "2011-10-15T00:51:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/21 "2011-10-15T03:12:29Z")
> [@magellan01](#): > > If the fractured skull happened with the initial blows I applaud them without reservation. If they happened with the last series of blows, I applaud them with a little reservation. It’s not always easy to stop once the defense mechanism is triggered. Still, the douchebags set things in motion. Justice was served. And it rained great blows down upon them. I friggin love it. That’s because you’re a terrible person. I don’t mean that as a joke, you’re literally a complete failure as a human being. Some of that can be laid at the feet of your inferior reasoning skills, but really, your parents need to shoulder some of the blame. ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/22 "2011-10-15T03:14:06Z")
> [@Terr](#): > > No. The “internet-tough” are the people who think that when they’re in a fight they can manage to maintain proportionality of response. No, internet-tough is when you think beating an unarmed woman with a metal bar is laudable. You’re a twerp. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/23 "2011-10-15T03:14:23Z")
> [@Terr](#): > > No. The “internet-tough” are the people who think that when they’re in a fight they can manage to maintain proportionality of response. I’ve known people who’ve been in fights. They survived because they could maintain proportionality of response. The guy in the video could not and now he’s been arrested for assault. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/24 "2011-10-15T03:16:26Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > I’ve known people who’ve been in fights. They survived because they could maintain proportionality of response. . Of course they did. The ones that miscalculated died or went to prison. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/25 "2011-10-15T03:17:31Z")
> [@Lobohan](#): > > No, internet-tough is when you think beating an unarmed woman with a metal bar is laudable. > > You’re a twerp. What does being a woman have to do with it? Does having a dick make you more metal bar tolerant? ---
**Author:** ![magellan01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@magellan01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magellan01)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/26 "2011-10-15T03:20:39Z")
> [@Lobohan](#): > > That’s because you’re a terrible person. I don’t mean that as a joke, you’re literally a complete failure as a human being. > > Some of that can be laid at the feet of your inferior reasoning skills, but really, your parents need to shoulder some of the blame. You’ll understand, of course, if I don’t give a shit what you think about me. The inexplicable ridiculously overwrought ego you have, which is put on display every day on these boards, is comical in the extreme. So, yawn. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/27 "2011-10-15T03:22:25Z")
> [@Terr](#): > > No. The “internet-tough” are the people who think that when they’re in a fight they can manage to maintain proportionality of response. Bullshit. There is a difference between giving it everything you have in a fight when you are defending yourself and having no mercy on a fellow human who has clearly been bloodied and defeated. ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/28 "2011-10-15T03:23:10Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > What does being a woman have to do with it? Does having a dick make you more metal bar tolerant? Nothing in particular. But having a dick generally means you are stronger, larger and shaped by nature to be better in close-in hand-to-hand combat. There are, of course, exceptions. Take it as an admonition that beating someone to the extent that they have life threatening injuries when they are much, much weaker than you isn’t a feat worthy of praise. Was that sufficient to put out the fiery outrage you were stoking? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![magellan01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@magellan01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magellan01)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/29 "2011-10-15T03:24:39Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > I’ve known people who’ve been in fights. They survived because they could maintain proportionality of response. The guy in the video could not and now he’s been arrested for assault. And if there’s a trial with the video shown on court, he should get off. If I was on the jury he’s be a free man. I feel sorry for the guy, as well. He spend the last third of his life in jail. He gets out and is doing what we want him to: working. It’s not a great job, but he’s doing what he can. And then these two assholes show up and fuck him up that way? Fuck that. The douchebags got what they deserved. ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/30 "2011-10-15T03:26:04Z")
> [@magellan01](#): > > You’ll understand, of course, if I don’t give a shit what you think about me. The inexplicable ridiculously overwrought ego you have, which is put on display every day on these boards, is comical in the extreme. So, yawn. My ego? Of the two of us, I’m not the one trying to keep a large segment of the population from marrying because it _offends my sensibilities_. Keep fucking that chicken, Magellan. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/31 "2011-10-15T03:27:15Z")
> [@Lobohan](#): > > Nothing in particular. But having a dick generally means you are stronger, larger and shaped by nature to be better in close-in hand-to-hand combat. So you are a sexist? ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/32 "2011-10-15T03:28:14Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > So you are a sexist? So you’re a dipshit? ---
**Author:** ![Terr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/839c29/32.png) [@Terr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terr)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/33 "2011-10-15T03:30:40Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > Bullshit. There is a difference between giving it everything you have in a fight when you are defending yourself and having no mercy on a fellow human who has clearly been bloodied and defeated. It’s not like the guy came back after 5 minutes and kicked them again. The whole fight was about 15-20 seconds as far as I can see. It is amusing to see armchair quarterbacks on the internet discussing how in a 15-second violent incident they would certainly have the presence of mind to consider the proportionality of their response to someone attacking them. ---
**Author:** ![magellan01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@magellan01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magellan01)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/34 "2011-10-15T03:30:50Z")
> [@Lobohan](#): > > My ego? Of the two of us, I’m not the one trying to keep a large segment of the population from marrying because it _offends my sensibilities_. Which just proves that you have poor reading comprehension. But I don’t blame you. Lobotomy Boy, for wanting to change the subject. Though it does show you to be the intellectual lightweight you are. So, good job. > [@Lobohan](#): > > Keep fucking that chicken, Magellan. Huh? Why do you refer to your wife as a chicken? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![magellan01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@magellan01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magellan01)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/35 "2011-10-15T03:33:05Z")
> [@Terr](#): > > It’s not like the guy came back after 5 minutes and kicked them again. The whole fight was about 15-20 seconds as far as I can see. > > It is amusing to see armchair quarterbacks on the internet discussing how in a 15-second violent incident they would certainly have the presence of mind to consider the proportionality of their response to someone attacking them. Precisely. Also, even boxers sometime can’t stop at the bell. And they are probably the best trained people on the planet when it comes to going form full-on fight mode to dropping one’s hands. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/36 "2011-10-15T03:39:04Z")
Probably less well trained when it comes to dropping a metal bar on an unconscious woman. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/37 "2011-10-15T03:41:57Z")
> [@Terr](#): > > It’s not like the guy came back after 5 minutes and kicked them again. The whole fight was about 15-20 seconds as far as I can see. > > It is amusing to see armchair quarterbacks on the internet discussing how in a 15-second violent incident they would certainly have the presence of mind to consider the proportionality of their response to someone attacking them. I’ve been in several fistfights in my life and I’ve been attacked unannouced before and I **never** had even the impulse to continue the violence when my foe was defenseless. I think it is the difference between me and that McDonald’s employee when it comes to “self defense”. If left undisturbed, it looked mighty likely that he would have continued to pummel the girl with the pipe until she was dead. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/38 "2011-10-15T03:45:19Z")
> [@magellan01](#): > > Precisely. Also, even boxers sometime can’t stop at the bell. And they are probably the best trained people on the planet when it comes to going form full-on fight mode to dropping one’s hands. Didn’t you spend some time a couple of years back defending the pharmacist who, after legally shooting his robbers, came back into the store and put one in the head of a defenseless person? You know, the pharmacist who was convicted. ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/39 "2011-10-15T03:45:50Z")
> [@magellan01](#): > > Which just proves that you have poor reading comprehension. But I don’t blame you. Lobotomy Boy, for wanting to change the subject. Though it does show you to be the intellectual lightweight you are. So, good job. I didn’t change the subject, I illustrated that your scurrilous attack on me was hypocritical. I leave this one to the peanut gallery. > [@](#): > > Huh? Why do you refer to your wife as a chicken? 😃 Oh you clever duck! Uh… wait, let me think of one… I sodomized your father with a broken broom handle. While roughly shaking the stick inside him, I triggered a shuddering, whole-body prostate orgasm and made him lick his own thick, clotted cum off the dirt floor of the barn we were in. It wasn’t his best moment. And while he was there, huddled, with mud and cum smeared over his face, the only think he could think to say to me was, “I’m so disappointed in my son.” Are we done with the _I did yer ma_ portion of the thread? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2011, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696/40 "2011-10-15T03:48:36Z")
> [@magellan01](#): > > Precisely. Also, even boxers sometime can’t stop at the bell. And they are probably the best trained people on the planet when it comes to going form full-on fight mode to dropping one’s hands. They don’t continue to pummel them once they’ve hit the floor and they’re _down_, however. You are comparing the McDonald’s employee hitting the defenseless girl on the floor with the metal pipe to a boxer who continues to spar at the sound of a round-ending bell. That is not an apt comparison. It should the McDonald’s employee is like a boxer who leans down and continues to hit an opponent who has been knocked out and is in a heap on the floor [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ex-felon-vs-the-two-drunk-douchebags/599696.md?page=3)