# The Fantastic Four; is anyone gonna see this turd? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 7, 2005, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422 "2005-07-07T06:01:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Raguleader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/258eb7/32.png) [@Raguleader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raguleader)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/21 "2005-07-07T14:03:00Z")
Oh, and also, I’m highly economically amused. I thought the Wing Commander movie was a blast. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![middleman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9a140/32.png) [@middleman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/middleman)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/22 "2005-07-07T14:09:32Z")
I was getting a little excited about it until these reviews came in. It looked like X-Men lite. Now it is beginning to look like a turd sandwich. And it is a shame too. I really wanted this movie to do very well. Not because of the first one, but can you imagine how cool the SECOND one would be? ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/23 "2005-07-07T14:17:34Z")
I want to see it, because Fantastic Four is what got me reading comics in the first place, but I’m beginning to get concerned that I’ll regret spending $9 on a ticket. **GuanoLad** , do you really think “Mister Fantastic” sounds dumber than “Mister Incredible”? Yet “The Incredibles” was an awesome movie. ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Tonya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/4491bb/32.png) [@Queen\_Tonya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Tonya)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/24 "2005-07-07T14:31:48Z")
I have a twelve yo son, we’ll see it for sure, probably opening day. ---
**Author:** ![Birdmonster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/71e660/32.png) [@Birdmonster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Birdmonster)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/25 "2005-07-07T14:54:20Z")
On a quasi-realted note, has any movie ever been more cross-marketed than this one? I don’t even think Star Wars 3 had as many product tie ins. ---
**Author:** ![SisterCoyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@SisterCoyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SisterCoyote)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/26 "2005-07-07T15:02:47Z")
I won’t pay to see it in the theater, and probably won’t willingly pay to rent it. I want to know why, with all the FX tech that’s available, they can’t make Ben Grimm look like he’s actually made of stone rather than a guy in a foam rubber suit. ---
**Author:** ![Raguleader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/258eb7/32.png) [@Raguleader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raguleader)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/27 "2005-07-07T15:04:17Z")
> [@SisterCoyote](#): > > I won’t pay to see it in the theater, and probably won’t willingly pay to rent it. > > I want to know why, with all the FX tech that’s available, they can’t make Ben Grimm look like he’s actually made of stone rather than a guy in a foam rubber suit. Dude… do you have any idea how hard it is to MAKE realistic-looking foam rubber suits in CGI? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Wolfian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7ea924/32.png) [@Wolfian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfian)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/28 "2005-07-07T15:13:35Z")
My favorite line from Ebert’s review: > [@Ebert](#): > > it is no consolation to her that invisible nudity is more of a metaphysical concept than a condition. Man can that guy diss movies. Looks like this is going to be a wait for HBO thing. ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/29 "2005-07-07T15:23:21Z")
I dunno about going to the theater, but Jessica Alba’s in it, and the fire guy was in _Not Another Teen Movie_, so I’ll probably catch it eventually. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/30 "2005-07-07T15:30:56Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > It’s got Jessica Alba in it, doesn’t it? Opening day, baby! Yeah, but she’s _invisible_! :mad: > [@CalMeacham](#): > > I haven’t followed it in ages, but back in the 1960s, when Stan Lee and Jack Kirby were putting it together, this was one of the absolute Best comics. From about issues 30 to 100 it showed mind-blowing cosmic adventures with Kirby’s wonderfully operatic artwork. The FF got me into comics, especially the Galactus/ silver surfer story. > [@](#): > > If the movie manages to capture a tenth of that it’ll be good. It won’t. They appear to totally mangle the Doctor Doom Character. ---
**Author:** ![tripthicket](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripthicket/32/297_2.png) [@tripthicket](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tripthicket)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/31 "2005-07-07T15:33:37Z")
I have been a fan of the Fantastic Four since I discovered them in the 60s. I even remember the Saturday morning cartoon from that era (before the H.E.R.B.I.E. cartoon version). Only the fact they’re my absolute favorite superhero title kept me reading them for all this time, as other titles have eclipsed them almost continually since the Lee/Kirby era. They have had good runs here and there, but they’ve always suffered because their basic concept isn’t as cool as other things that have come along since then (despite writers trying to make them cooler by twisting them into what they are not). Also, when writers or artists talk about which title they can’t wait to get their hands on next or someday, the FF is rarely mentioned. I’ll just very briefly and quietly mention the Corman movie, which I have never actually seen, but of which I have read many opinions. I am not expecting this movie to rise to the level achieved by the recent Spider-Man, X-Men, and Batman movies. Again, the basic concept doesn’t fit in with today’s sensibilities, which reveres the anti-hero as much as or more than the hero (_cough_Wolverine_cough_). I’m thinking this may be more like the Hulk and Daredevil movies in story quality. I’m going to see a matinee tomorrow, and I imagine I’ll leave the theater feeling a bit sad that the movie didn’t reach heights I would have liked. But I won’t regret actually seeing a Fantastic Four movie. I hope. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/32 "2005-07-07T16:03:07Z")
> [@](#): > > Plus, it’s always a trip to hear Ioan Grufford talk without a British accent. Took me YEARS to realize he was in Black Hawk Down. Ioan Gruffudd. Yes, he’s pretty versatile. I’ll be seeing this because my mission in life is to keep the girlfriend happy. Somehow the FF have never caught my imagination the way some of the other characters have. I guess this means we won’t be seeing a seriocomic Plasticman movie. ---
**Author:** ![Licentious\_Ectomorph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/5e9695/32.png) [@Licentious\_Ectomorph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Licentious_Ectomorph)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/33 "2005-07-07T16:03:53Z")
I plan to see it, and I’m not even a Marvel fan. I just like superhero movies. I don’t go to them expecting Shakespeare, just some fun action, special effects, and escapism. But what do I know? I like _Batman and Robin_. 😃 I do wish DC would make a good superhero movie. _Batman Begins_ is a step in the right direction. ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/34 "2005-07-07T16:25:42Z")
The Fantastic Four epitomized cool back in the 60s. Forget about Spider-man and the Hulk. The FF had all the cool villains, all the cool gadgets, all the cool soap opera, all the cool supporting characters. They made Marvel. Stan Lee could write so trippily pretentious as to melt his typewriter ribbon and Jack Kirby could incorporate his cigar ashes into his starscapes and it all worked perfectly in context. The abomination I’ve caught glimpses of in the trailers and commercials has nothing whatsoever to do with that wonder. Watch _The Incredibles_ and leave the comics for the cartoons. Enough’s enough. Let’s call a moratorium. ---
**Author:** ![athelas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@athelas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/athelas)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/35 "2005-07-07T16:26:48Z")
> [@cmkeller](#): > > **GuanoLad** , do you really think “Mister Fantastic” sounds dumber than “Mister Incredible”? Yet “The Incredibles” was an awesome movie. Well, _The Incredibles_ was as much satire as anything else. ---
**Author:** ![Birdmonster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/71e660/32.png) [@Birdmonster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Birdmonster)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/36 "2005-07-07T16:35:45Z")
I’m surprised to see all this love for '60s FF. I grew up reading comics in the 80s and I’ve always considered their popularity unbelievable. Apparently they had a hayday in their younger years. Now though, they just seem dated. I’d also like to add that Daredevil, mentioned above, was one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. And not in an enjoyable way ---
**Author:** ![Lanzy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/74df32/32.png) [@Lanzy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lanzy)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/37 "2005-07-07T16:39:05Z")
UP YOURS!!! I’ve waited over 20 years for this movie. I will be in line the day it starts. AND The FF is one of the greatist comic books ever. ---
**Author:** ![PookahMacPhellimey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pookahmacphellimey/32/3175_2.png) [@PookahMacPhellimey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PookahMacPhellimey)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/38 "2005-07-07T16:39:14Z")
Die da? Nein, Freitags ist sie nie da. (Central Euro-Dopers only joke) ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/39 "2005-07-07T16:46:01Z")
Don’t get me wrong. I _love_ the comic books. But when the trailer looks really crappy and they do all the merchandizing before the movie opens…? It’s going to fantasti-suck, in a major way. I’ll rent it when it comes out. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/40 "2005-07-07T16:46:36Z")
A guy I used to work with had an interesting theory about how to make a superhero movie work; when you cast the hero, don’t choose someone who can play the hero, choose someone who can play the secret identity. _Superman_ worked because Christopher Reeve could be convincing as Clark Kent. _Spider-Man_ works because Tobey Maguire makes a damn good Peter Parker. So the question is, can Ioan Gruffudd, Jessica Alba, Chris Evans and Michael Chiklis be convincing as extended-family/scientists/astronauts? In my opinion, probably not. I still may catch it cheap someday, from Netflix or when it makes it to TV. And I’d kinda like the see the 1994 Corman version, too. (I wonder how my friend’s rule about casting will hold up to that one.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422.md?page=3)