# The Fantastic Four; is anyone gonna see this turd? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 7, 2005, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422 "2005-07-07T06:01:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/41 "2005-07-07T16:49:14Z")
> [@Robot Arm](#): > > A guy I used to work with had an interesting theory about how to make a superhero movie work; when you cast the hero, don’t choose someone who can play the hero, choose someone who can play the secret identity. _Superman_ worked because Christopher Reeve could be convincing as Clark Kent. _Spider-Man_ works because Tobey Maguire makes a damn good Peter Parker. That’s… actually a really good theory. Heh. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/42 "2005-07-07T16:54:01Z")
I was really hoping for Bill Murray to reprise his role as Johnny Storm, but I’ll go see it anyway. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/43 "2005-07-07T17:55:10Z")
But … but … we _have_ to watch it. The TV told us to. ---
**Author:** ![Jurph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/50afbb/32.png) [@Jurph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurph)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/44 "2005-07-07T17:56:09Z")
> [@Robot Arm](#): > > A guy I used to work with had an interesting theory about how to make a superhero movie work; when you cast the hero, don’t choose someone who can play the hero, choose someone who can play the secret identity. _Superman_ worked because Christopher Reeve could be convincing as Clark Kent. _Spider-Man_ works because Tobey Maguire makes a damn good Peter Parker. …And Christian Bale is the most believable Bruce Wayne yet! I like it. The only thing I don’t like is the fact that this film appears to be headed for Turdburg, and I’m going to be on the first bus because I’m going with a bunch of friends. ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/45 "2005-07-07T18:07:40Z")
I’ve got 2 free passes to see it tonight, so I’ll go. ---
**Author:** ![Jurph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/50afbb/32.png) [@Jurph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurph)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/46 "2005-07-07T18:13:46Z")
> [@Robot Arm](#): > > A guy I used to work with had an interesting theory about how to make a superhero movie work; when you cast the hero, don’t choose someone who can play the hero, choose someone who can play the secret identity. _Superman_ worked because Christopher Reeve could be convincing as Clark Kent. _Spider-Man_ works because Tobey Maguire makes a damn good Peter Parker. …And Christian Bale is the most believable Bruce Wayne yet! I like it. The only thing I don’t like is the fact that this film appears to be headed for Turdburg, and I’m going to be on the first bus because I’m going with a bunch of friends. ---
**Author:** ![Nobody](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/94ad74/32.png) [@Nobody](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nobody)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/47 "2005-07-07T18:17:22Z")
Although I’ve a couple of comic book movies, and they were actually half way decent, every time a new comic book movie, or sequil comes out, I’m pretty apathetic, and if I watch one at all, it’s gonna be on DVD. Same with the Fantastic 4. However, if they make one where they battle Galactus, you better believe I’ll be there. ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/48 "2005-07-07T18:21:47Z")
Ioan Gruffudd, mmmm. ---
**Author:** ![Emerald\_Hawk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Emerald\_Hawk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emerald_Hawk)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/49 "2005-07-07T18:28:14Z")
> [@tripthicket](#): > > I’ll just very briefly and quietly mention the Corman movie, which I have never actually seen, but of which I have read many opinions. Oh man, the original unreleased Fantastic Four movie was terrible. However, some parts were so hilariously bad they were good. At one point, Dr. Doom is giving a long speech about his evil plan to our fantastic heroes. Now, since Dr. Doom wears a mask, the actor who plays him can’t really infuse him with the emotion he needs using facial expressions. Instead, he compensates with hand gestures. Over compensates, that is. When he describes the “laser” used by his plan, he makes a little gun with his right hand, and uses his left index finger to demonstrate the beam coming out of his little gun. At another point, he mentions “irony”. He comes up with a gesture where he makes two V’s with the middle and index fingers and points them towards each other, with the backs of his hands facing forward. If I ever get “irony” in charades I am so set. Assuming someone other than me has seen the movie that is 🙂 . To this day my friends and I still make the sign whenever someone mentions irony. ---
**Author:** ![Arch\_Trout](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9f8e36/32.png) [@Arch\_Trout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arch_Trout)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/50 "2005-07-07T18:36:22Z")
I’ve seen X-Men, Batman, Blade, Spiderman, Constantine, Daredevil, Elektra, Sin City etc…so yeah, I’ll go along and see it, fully expecting it to be rubbish. Can’t get off the comic book to movie adaptation rollercoaster, it’s a compulsion! ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/51 "2005-07-07T18:41:00Z")
Well, I was a big fan of the '60s FF comix, so I’ll give the movie a shot. If it’s bad, and so far it looks like it’ll be somewhere between mediocre and truly dire, I’ll entertain myself by making fun of the characters. It’s all good. ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/52 "2005-07-07T18:56:17Z")
> [@Birdmonster](#): > > On a quasi-realted note, has any movie ever been more cross-marketed than this one? I don’t even think Star Wars 3 had as many product tie ins. Well, I haven’t seen FF window blinds, airline barf bags, dog clothing, Mr. Potato Heads, Legos, lottery tickets, marshmellow cereal, fruit snacks, pinatas, cookie jars, and new M&M and Pop Tart flavors. _Sith_ had all these things (plus the typical fast food/cel phone/action figure tie-ins), and much more. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/53 "2005-07-07T19:03:57Z")
> [@Wolfian](#): > > My favorite line from Ebert’s review: > > > [@Ebert](#): > > > > it is no consolation to her that invisible nudity is more of a metaphysical concept than a condition. Hilarious. Interesting when you think about the fact that Alba refused to appear nude in a role as a _stripper_. ---
**Author:** ![Nobody](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/94ad74/32.png) [@Nobody](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nobody)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/54 "2005-07-07T19:08:11Z")
> [@acsenray](#): > > Hilarious. Interesting when you think about the fact that Alba refused to appear nude in a role as a _stripper_. Is she supposed to be a stripper in the Fantastic Four or are you referring to her role in Sin City? If so, I haven’t seen the movie, but I read an interview in Entertainment Weekly, where she and director discussed nudity, and she had absolutely no problem with it, but the director decided against it because the movie had plenty of nudity and violence, and so on already, and having Alba do nude scenes, in his opinion, would have been overkill. ---
**Author:** ![Soapbox\_Monkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed655f/32.png) [@Soapbox\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soapbox_Monkey)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/55 "2005-07-07T19:09:11Z")
> [@watsonwil](#): > > Not because of the first one, but can you imagine how cool the SECOND one would be? That’s my only gripe with the new wave of super hero movies. Why the need to show the origin of each and every one of them? In some cases it takes up half the movie, so that nothing _really_ great can even be shown until the second one. I had to wait 3 years for a _good_ Spiderman movie (I really disliked the first one). Why not take an example from the first Burton Batman film. No long drawn out origin stories. Bad guys are about, Batman comes in and whoops some ass. What, are audiences these days mentally incapable of being able to handle being dropped into the middle of a story in progress? They need to see the entire set up? ---
**Author:** ![audiobottle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc8723/32.png) [@audiobottle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/audiobottle)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/56 "2005-07-07T19:15:20Z")
> [@Master Control](#): > > Is she supposed to be a stripper in the Fantastic Four or are you referring to her role in Sin City? If so, I haven’t seen the movie, but I read an interview in Entertainment Weekly, where she and director discussed nudity, and she had absolutely no problem with it, but the director decided against it because the movie had plenty of nudity and violence, and so on already, and having Alba do nude scenes, in his opinion, would have been overkill. That’s odd, because I thought I remembered reading an article in… was it Wired?.. that said she didn’t want to do nudity because of what her father would say. I think she then said something about how it would be bad enough having him see her in the skimpy costumes or something (note: I haven’t seen Sin City yet). ---
**Author:** ![Soapbox\_Monkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed655f/32.png) [@Soapbox\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soapbox_Monkey)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/57 "2005-07-07T19:15:46Z")
> [@Licentious Ectomorph](#): > > I do wish DC would make a good superhero movie. Well for that to happen they would need better superheroes first. 😛 _ducks_ ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/58 "2005-07-07T19:18:22Z")
> [@Master Control](#): > > Is she supposed to be a stripper in the Fantastic Four or are you referring to her role in Sin City? If so, I haven’t seen the movie, but I read an interview in Entertainment Weekly, where she and director discussed nudity, and she had absolutely no problem with it, but the director decided against it because the movie had plenty of nudity and violence, and so on already, and having Alba do nude scenes, in his opinion, would have been overkill. I am talking about Sin City. And if that’s what they said, then I have a big :dubious: regarding their honesty and forthrightness. “Plenty of nudity and violence”? If that’s what they said; my only reaction is that I’m sick of people equating nudity and violence. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/59 "2005-07-07T19:19:24Z")
> [@Soapbox Monkey](#): > > Well for that to happen they would need better superheroes first. 😛 > > _ducks_ Aw, c’mon–I’m a Marvel fangirl, but Batman, Superman, et al. rock _hardcore_. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Thalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f475e1/32.png) [@Thalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thalion)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2005, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422/60 "2005-07-07T19:20:49Z")
> [@Master Control](#): > > I read an interview in Entertainment Weekly, where she and director discussed nudity, and she had absolutely no problem with it, but the director decided against it because the movie had plenty of nudity and violence, and so on already, and having Alba do nude scenes, in his opinion, would have been overkill. Let me get this straight - Jessica Alba said, “Hey, I’ll do a nude scene” and the director said, “Nah, that’s not necessary”? I had a lot of respect for him after seeing _Sin City_. Now you tell me that he’s the enemy of men everywhere! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fantastic-four-is-anyone-gonna-see-this-turd/311422.md?page=4)