# The Fat Man Rants
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [October 31, 2005, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779 "2005-10-31T20:34:52Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@capybara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/capybara)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/21 "2005-11-01T00:31:11Z")
Oh, imagine the psychic pain of being an unhip, 30-something grad student, overweight, and going to the student gym at. . . UCSB. Where there must be an Anorexia Glee Club student group, and everyone wears little thong undies and crop-t’s that say ‘Porn Star’ or ‘Princess’ bearing their deep tan and navel piercings. You get on one of the treadmills and realize that with every step it goes THUD THUD THUD and no one ELSE’S machine is saying THUD.
I gave up on that quickly. In the woods no one hears your footsteps.
The fact is, you fit people, that for many of us working out is in no way fun and in no way CAN be fun for quite some time-- eventuially perhaps but not today. Fun is something you experience when you are not suffering and in pain. The rest of that are trying to get where you are. It takes some time-- it’s not just a mental condition. It’s not a state of mind. It’s the difference between “Ooh! Down to a 9-minute mile! Feel the burn!” versus “I tried to work up to two miles today but got shinsplints and now it hurts in the middle of the night.”
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### Author:  [@StarvingButStrong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StarvingButStrong)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/22 "2005-11-01T00:53:39Z")
I have a t-shirt that says “Do Not Talk to the Anti-Social Bitch” – maybe you could find something like that to wear?
And wearing headphones works good, too. They don’t even have to be plugged into anything, they get the message “don’t want to talk” across without a word.
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### Author:  [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/23 "2005-11-01T01:07:23Z")
I am with the OP. When I could run, I quickly found that I hated running with other people, period. If I want to talk to you, I’ll call you and we’ll have coffee.
When I joined Curves (need low impact now)–I LIKE the results. I like the way exercise makes me feel, _afterward._ I have never, through PE classes, swimming competitively my whole childhood, through JV swimming in HS, aerobics, Tai bo–you name it–I have NEVER felt good when exercising. I have never looked forward to it in the same way as say a European vacation or payday. It’s something to be done, and as quickly as possible, so I can get on with my day.
Endorphins, schmendorphins.
I am fairly fit and coordinated and like physical activity–I just never have experienced that runner’s “high” or whatever.
Everyone is different–and those who DON’T want to be chatty at the club shouldn’t have to be. One thing I dislike about Curves is that is all women–and they want to TALK their workout away. Ugh. Leave me alone to concentrate on my form/exercise/heart rate whatever.
Why is it so difficult to understand that exercise is NOT “fun” for everyone? To each his own.
I promise I would never bother you, **mamboman**.
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### Author:  [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/24 "2005-11-01T03:41:39Z")
dude, you have to check out swimming.
I’m there in the water, with no glasses on (can’t see) and earplugs or [headphones](http://www.h2oaudio.com/) (can’t hear) and it’s AMAZING. I’m under water with my fat self and no one can see me, and if they do I don’t care because I can’t see or hear them, and I’m truly in a world of my own. I think people try to talk to me all the time but sorry - can’t hear ya!
Ever tread water in the deep end listening to “Dark Side of the Moon”?
Bliss.
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### Author:  [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/25 "2005-11-01T04:28:19Z")
An excellent rant, and one that really resonates with me. It drives me batshit when people try to talk to me at the gym. I’ve been running for more than 15 years now, and unless I’m on a long run or with a friend, I prefer working out in my own little world with as few interruptions as possible. You know that “flow” runners are supposed to get into when they’re running? Real hard to get into when some idiot is yammering away at me about what diet they’re on. I’m fine with a “Hi.” or “Is this treadmill broken?” or even a “How are you?” But I honestly don’t want to commiserate with the person next to me about how big our guts are and how hard we have to work to get them to go away. Especially since I’m pregnant and beginning to show, which evidently opens me up to a whole new world of random jackasses talking to me at the gym.
“Oh, my God! You shouldn’t be running! You’re pregnant.” “Why are you doing squats with that [extremely light] bar? Aren’t you worried you’re going to kill your baby?” Never mind that my doctor’s fine with me doing whatever I can for as long as I comfortably can - I ought to listen to some random yahoo instead because, well, he’s there. He _must_ be the expert.
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### Author:  [@zweisamkeit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zweisamkeit)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/26 "2005-11-01T04:56:54Z")
> [@Kalhoun](#):
>
> I’ll never understand why touchy, self-loathing types go to public gyms. If you can’t afford the equipment at home, go on off hours or something so those fat fucking nice people don’t try to be pleasant to you. Those selfish fucks. How dare they try to be nice to an obviously fat person! FUCK THEM!
Exactly. It couldn’t be that they’re just trying to be nice and polite. If you’re around a big bunch of people, don’t act like it’s the biggest surprise in the world that you might have to interact with them occasionally. I’m not saying to have the attitude of “Thank God, people are saying hi to me at the gym!” but cripes.
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### Author:  [@Chotii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chotii)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/27 "2005-11-01T05:59:58Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#):
>
> Everyone is different–and those who DON’T want to be chatty at the club shouldn’t have to be. One thing I dislike about Curves is that is all women–and they want to TALK their workout away. Ugh. Leave me alone to concentrate on my form/exercise/heart rate whatever.
I work out at Curves 4X/week, and I _WANT_ to talk to people. Geez, the women at Curves are frequently the only adults I see for most of the day, not counting the lady at the post office, or the cashier at the grocery store. But I see a lot of women who simply radiate ‘do not talk to me’ vibes. Sometimes I’m literally next to them, station by station, for two full circuits. They don’t want to talk, I can tell, so I don’t talk to them. I’ll call the employee over and chat with her. It helps my time go more quickly. It gives me adult conversation. That’s valuable to me. Or, sometimes, I’ll just listen to other people talk. What I can’t stand is feeling that I _cannot_ talk to _anyone_. Then I feel alone, and the entire workout becomes work for me, rather than enjoyable, and I’m less likely to want to even go the next time.
I hated the ‘regular’ gym because I had no idea what to do, the things I could figure out to do ultimately hurt me (like the stair-climber, and too much treadmill), and I felt isolated. If I wanted to be alone for an hour, I’d go for a fricking walk and save myself the $40 a month! Curves is good for me: they tell you what to do, the machines are low-stress, I don’t wind up with back pain like I did with the treadmill, and it’s a 5 minute drive away. And I like the fact it’s all women, so I don’t feel self-conscious in front of a bunch of strange men. So, I’m glad I have the option, anyway. And I’m glad regular gyms work for some other people.
I’m glad, by the way, to hear the perspective of someone who doesn’t _want_ to talk, because in the absence of actual information, I tend to blame myself for these things.
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### Author:  [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/28 "2005-11-01T06:20:38Z")
> [@mamboman](#):
>
> … Hey guy selling personal training sessions. Did you interrupt me? You hate to pull me out of the zone. I have news for you mister, I wasn’t in any fucking zone – **I was listening to the White Album**.
Well no WONDER, how can you be expected to get into the zone listening to The White Album???
😃
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### Author:  [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/29 "2005-11-01T06:29:52Z")
> [@Pedro](#):
>
> You sound like a gelatinous ass.
Teasing the OP about trying to work out to the White Album aside. He’s right. And I enjoy the hell out of the gym. Unlike the OP, I LOVE cardio and lower body and am learning to tolerate upper body (the only reason I don’t like it is because I have such puny upper body strength).
Anyway, I LOVE it, and I feel the same way he does. I AM in the zone. From the second I start heading toward the gym in my car I’m working out my routine for that day and I’ve already got my first set worked out in my head and am mentally THERE when I walk in the door.
The gym is there for a reason, and it’s not idle chit chat. I am going for that high and the accomplishment, as well as getting my chub gone too. When I work out with a partner, we have fun, we laugh and joke, but we get ON WITH IT and don’t dilly dally and lag.
You wouldn’t stop your car in the middle of a carwash, shut down production and start a coffee klatch would you? Or stop everyone in the middle of taking their SATs to have a party?
It’s a task, some like it, some hate it, but it has a purpose and it’s clueless at best, and rude as hell when intentional to interrupt somene’s routine.
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### Author:  [@mamboman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mamboman)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/30 "2005-11-01T09:38:49Z")
> [@CanvasShoes](#):
>
> Well no WONDER, how can you be expected to get into the zone listening to The White Album???
>
> 😃
Man, the White Album _is_ the zone…
mm
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### Author:  [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/31 "2005-11-01T12:09:41Z")
**Chotii** --I hear you, but I don’t want to talk to strangers at Curves. A “good morning” or “nice day” is one thing–I do not want sustained conversation, at all.
So I am the one giving off the vibe. I hate that I have to do that. Why can’t I just come in and do my thing and leave? I have to assume my don’t mess with me face just to shut people up-ugh.
The only reason I do Curves is for the whole body workout. I tend to neglect the upper body if given half a chance.
And now I see why I don’t belong to a gym–I would be irritated by a guy coming over to give me advice etc, **overlyverbose**. Oy-are you tempted to hit them with the bar? I would be.
Basically, I like to exercise alone. I can’t do that at present, but I don’t see a reason to turn it into a social hour.
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### Author:  [@Madd\_Maxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Madd_Maxx)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/32 "2005-11-01T12:25:07Z")
> [@Nithotep](#):
>
> There’s a video game out that some people might want to look into called [Yourself! Fitness](http://www.yourselffitness.com/)\
I checked out the site and it looks interesting. Your post sounds like you have used it for a bit, how do you like it? Are you using the PC version or one of the console versions? How long is your average work out and how many times a week? If it’s not too personal, what kind of results have you had? You can email me through my profile instead of hijacking this thread any further. Thanks for sharing the link though.
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### Author:  [@Who\_me\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Who_me_1)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/33 "2005-11-01T12:50:27Z")
I really don’t understand, I talk to people in the store, on the street, in the laundromat… if I went to the gym, I’d talk to them there too. If you don’t want to talk, then feel free to ignore me, tell me to shut the fuck up and go the fuck away or whatever.
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### Author:  [@Uvula\_Donor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uvula_Donor)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/34 "2005-11-01T12:55:36Z")
> [@mamboman](#):
>
> Don’t you even think about talking to me when I’m at the Gym
I thought fat people were supposed to be jolly.
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### Author:  [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/35 "2005-11-01T13:57:10Z")
I’m totally with the OP.
For those of you who enjoy exercise, good for you. You have a gift.
But stop saying things like, “first step is to enjoy exercise.” There are some of us who will never enjoy it. We just have to do it like taking medicine. Your attempts at encouragement and good cheer are not helping. This is work, this is slogging. Just let us get through it.
We’re not at the gym to participate in some endorphine-enhanced group hug. We’re not there to help create some kind of psychic “we’re all in this together” atmosphere.
We’re there to sweat. And if we need to watch television, read, listen to music, or watch our little portable DVDs to get through it, just leave us the fuck alone.
Exercise sucks. It’s painful and, worse, it’s boring. I need distraction. So don’t bother me with your happy talk.
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### Author:  [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/36 "2005-11-01T14:10:49Z")
> [@Uvula Donor](#):
>
> I thought fat people were supposed to be jolly.
That is just freaking hilarious, Thank you, thank you thank you…
Now to the OP, yeah I’m with ya here. But as **DiosaBellissima** so ably pointed out, perhaps a few deep breaths would help? If it’s all that stressful you’re going to stop going and you don’t need that.
I recently moved and had to go from a Powerhouse Gym, to one associated with a hospital nearby. The change is incredible. Not only is it bigger and nicer but it’s not filled with lycra babes and muscle goons in tank tops. Just regular folks, some of them fat and jolly (or not apparently…), some of them skinny hot housewives (whom I ogle quite discreetly and NEVER attempt to strike up conversation with), and some normal guys like me. Aside from people that know each other from outside of the place, I see very little chatting up, or picking up going on.
It’s sooooooo nice. It justifies the roughly doubling of the monthly fee for me to have access to the equipment I want when I want it, and work out in peace and quiet.
Perhaps a change of scenery is in order?
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### Author:  [@Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Plastic_Ninja)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/37 "2005-11-01T14:23:34Z")
Different things work for different people, I find.
I’ve had workouts I enjoyed. Mostly it’s a horrible chore of dragging myself into the workout room or gym, forcing myself through however much exercise, and finally giving up after a few days/weeks/whatever.
Two things worked for me.
First: long, long ago when I first started college, I was on a vegetarian diet (long story) and went to the gym with my walkman. The music in there was very energetic and rhythmic and after a few minutes of exercise I realized suddenly it didn’t HURT. It wasn’t unpleasant. It was actually quite euphoric and relaxing, like I’d slipped out of a place where I had to worry about my physical body because it was doing just fine on its own. I got an hour’s workout and felt fantastic. Never been able to replicate that, and I don’t want to give up meat in order to try it (then again, with the weight I’ve gotten to, it might not be a bad idea… and those lentil pitas were fairly tasty).
Second: karate class, after a month. The first week or two was so much fun, and then it got difficult like moving through molasses for about two or three weeks. And then it was what I looked forward to all day. Not having the money to go and having a schedule change got me out of the habit, and now I’m trying to get back in.
YMMV, of course. Everyone’s does. But being physically active doesn’t HAVE to be a chore.
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### Author:  [@Plynck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Plynck)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/38 "2005-11-01T14:38:50Z")
> [@mamboman](#):
>
> If you say one more condescending oleaginous word to me, I’m going to put out your eyes, burn down your house and slaughter and skin your pets.
I burning your calories.
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### Author:  [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/39 "2005-11-01T15:00:15Z")
> [@Plynck](#):
>
> I burning your calories.
If someone else could burn my calories for me, I wouldn’t have to go to the gym.
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### Author:  [@Pedro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pedro)
#### Post date: [November 1, 2005, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-man-rants/328779/40 "2005-11-01T15:04:12Z")
> [@CanvasShoes](#):
>
> It’s a task, some like it, some hate it, but it has a purpose and it’s clueless at best, and rude as hell when intentional to interrupt somene’s routine.
I’m not sure why you are replying to me. It’s fine to want to be left alone at the gym. I’m like that too. It’s not fine to pretend to be a victim of society because of “living well” so everybody should just bend over backwards for the fat man.
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