# The Fat Moronic Bitch Who Bumped My Brand New Car **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 16, 2003, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614 "2003-05-16T04:42:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/21 "2003-05-16T06:08:27Z")
> [@](#): > > Lastly, concerning the girth of this so-called human female. She wasn’t just fat. She was morbidly obese. Wow! That bad, huh? I used to be a fat, ugly, bitch – even _morbidly obese_! The shame! The shame! Now I’m just an ugly bitch who thinks you are pond scum. You’ll get no sympathy here from me, peon. (Driving away in my hot red Chrysler Sebring convertible…) ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/22 "2003-05-16T06:18:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Keith Berry \* > \*\*You are hysterical, ludicrous, and nakedly neurotic. > \*\* I’m all for naked people! Yay! ---
**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/23 "2003-05-16T06:24:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lizard \* > The moralists turn on **Lizard** for daring to imply that the OP has a right to dislike anyone for any reason. **yosemitebabe** is already there. What? Please copy and paste where I wrote that I thought the OP had no “right” to dislike anyone for any reason. I was merely pointing out that the size, computer choice, diet (color of hair, number of toes, or many other detaisl) really have no bearing on whether or not a person is a big jerk who will hit-and-run. I mean, really. If I started an OP where I ranted on and on about how someone I didn’t like wore purple and she had 2 cats and liked open-toed shoes, while really, my main beef was that she was a gossip, wouldn’t you wonder why in the hell I was ranting on about the cats, purple, and open-toed shoes? What the hell does that have to do with gossiping? ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/24 "2003-05-16T06:26:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Keith Berry \* > \*\*I don’t judge people on the basis of a few posts, posts that are more designed to vent and express discontent than they are for people to take seriously. > > You are hysterical, ludicrous, and nakedly neurotic. > > The fact that you bothered to even respond to my posts, considering that you aimed to start an argument from the beginning, shows that you have very little of a life and even less self-esteem. \*\* Neurotic? Are you channeling Woody Allen circa 1977? You are a pretentious dolt with a large vocabulary used ineptly. I haven’t seen you take any responsibility for your feculent post. Your skill in reading me is similar to your sensitivity to others: it;s nearly non-existant. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/25 "2003-05-16T06:40:00Z")
Oh for the love of fuck, has everyone forgotten that this bitch hit his car and sped off? So then what she did is okay since he made light of her weight? “That bitch hit and ran! Oh, but wait, he called her a _fat_ bitch! In that case I have no sympathy for his loss and I’m glad she hit his god damn car and sped off. Crime rules when it’s against people who name call!” Riiiiight. **Keith** , I’m sorry about your fender bender. That super sucks. No it wasn’t all that nice of you to yell “YOU GODDAMNED FUCKING FAT BITCH!!!” at her, but hell, that whore deserved it. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/26 "2003-05-16T06:42:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mockingbird \* > **You are a pretentious dolt with a large vocabulary used ineptly.** Takes one to know one, apparently. ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/27 "2003-05-16T07:17:59Z")
> [@](#): > > Oh for the love of fuck, has everyone forgotten that this bitch hit his car and sped off? Pretty much. I think it’s called _kharma_. ---
**Author:** ![lucwarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e19adc/32.png) [@lucwarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lucwarm)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/28 "2003-05-16T08:06:50Z")
For what it’s worth, where I live (in the suburbs of NYC), the thin people seem to be ever so slightly more annoying than the fat people. Just my observation. As far as the OP goes, I agree that the driver’s size is irrelevant, but it does add a little flava to the story. Sorta like the rant here a week ago about the hot chick on roller blades ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 9:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/29 "2003-05-16T09:26:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Michael Ellis \* > \*\*Takes one to know one, apparently. \*\* Wow. Further stupidity from you. _What a shock_. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 9:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/30 "2003-05-16T09:37:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Zoe \* > \*\*Pretty much. > > I think it’s called _kharma_. \*\* Critizing someone’s personal appearence let’s the bitch off the hook for hit and run? ---
**Author:** ![Reuben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/54ee81/32.png) [@Reuben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reuben)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 9:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/31 "2003-05-16T09:56:05Z")
Has anyone else noticed that the most hateful, bilious, intolerant vitriol we see on these boards is invariably spewed out in the name of tolerance? Give the OP a break here. He’s not “sizeist”, he’s just venting! With very good reason. Deriding the physical aspects of some specific person who’s just done you a bit of no good is only human, and is harmless enough. Unless you are _that specific person_ the abuse is aimed at, why do you care? Watching these humourless Holy Joes, who seem to count all time lost when they aren’t hypocritically berating some hapless doper or other for imagined slights or lack of tolerance, always reminds me of something Flashman once said about sanctimonious idiots “who fight their way on to the Cross then bawl for the fellow with the hammer and the nails.” ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 9:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/32 "2003-05-16T09:59:29Z")
OK , now you bastards have got me thinking. How best to make a change in society? Which approach to use? The OP has used words that are inflammatory and _could_ be considered bigoted. Bigotry is certainly something we would like to change in society. But how should we do that? We’ve seen two approaches here. **alice\_in\_wonderland** tried the ‘giving information’ approach, saying that the OP might want to dial back on that kind of talk because it really didn’t help or his position and may be hurtful to somebody else. And in response, the OP disagreed to an extent but seemed to be willing to talk it over. **Mockingbird** took the ‘calling him a piece of shit’ approach, saying that because he used such terminology, he was beneath contempt and not worthy of being a member of decent society. Then the OP dug in his heels and responed in kind, hurling invective at **Mockingbird**. I submit that **alice** ’s approach may be more in tune with our stated purpose, and that **Mockingbird** ’s approach may be counter-productive, but that’s certainly open to debate. ---
**Author:** ![mallocks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f4b2a3/32.png) [@mallocks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mallocks)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/33 "2003-05-16T10:01:03Z")
apparently so. I read the OP as someone who’s very annoyed at getting his car damaged, and someone who still hasn’t cooled down. Evidently he didn’t think he’d bitched about this women enough, so he bitched some more, only about her size. Surely everyone at some point gets really pissed off, to the point where you really hate the person or thing that’s annoyed you. At that point you tend to start lambasting them whatever they’re like. Eventually I’m sure he’ll calm down, and the size of the woman in question won’t matter to him, only that she bumped his car and ran off without even an attempt at an apology. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 11:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/34 "2003-05-16T11:38:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mockingbird \* > \*\*Wow. Further stupidity from you. _What a shock_. \*\* _Further_ stupidity? Care to elaborate? Please? ---
**Author:** ![Chief\_Crunch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e8c25b/32.png) [@Chief\_Crunch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chief_Crunch)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/35 "2003-05-16T12:14:28Z")
Descriptive adjectives be damned! Let’s all be as vague as possible in our rants so we don’t offend anyone! ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/36 "2003-05-16T13:02:06Z")
That sucks that some asshat hit your car, Keith. The fact that she had the nerve to leave the scene of the (albeit small) accident makes it even worse. ---
**Author:** ![Early\_Out](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Early\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Early_Out)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/37 "2003-05-16T13:03:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Chief Crunch \* > \*\*Descriptive adjectives be damned! Let’s all be as vague as possible in our rants so we don’t offend anyone! \*\* Yeah!! How dare **Keith Berry** even _mention_ the fact that the person who hit his car was a woman?! And then call her a _bitch_!!! Clearly, he’s a sexist pig!!! And why is it relevant that this person was driving a minivan?! What’s he got against people who drive minivans?! He must be severely lacking in proper family values. And he’s obviously got issues with people who don’t have much money, since he saw fit to make mention of the fact that the minivan in question was “crappy.” Snooty rich bastard!! And his comment about the fact that the minivan had no license plate should tell all of us that he’s just a proto-vigilante. Hangin’s too good for him!!! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/38 "2003-05-16T13:03:38Z")
Keith, If that woman thinks a license plate is optional, if she thinks stopping at the scene of an accident is optional, do you believe she doesn’t think INSURANCE is optional? Face it, my friend, you were screwed no matter what she did. See, that’s the way it works in America. The people who do the right thing and buy insurance get screwed thirty ways. We subsidize all the ignorant scumbags who don’t buy insurance via the uninsured motorist premium. And if we do get into a wreck, you can be rest assured that some unscrupulous lawyer will turn our most minor accident into a multi-million dollar lawsuit simply because we have insurance. And meanwhile the people who don’t bother paying for insurance get off scot free. (Yes, you can sue them but people who don’t pay insurance generally don’t have anything worth taking. Or you’ll win…and they’ll ignore the judgement just like they ignored the law that said they need to get insurance. ) It’s a great system we have here! So, Keith, Ms. Asshat did you a favor by driving off. Because you at least got the satisfaction of hurling insults at her. That’s undoubtedly more than you would have gotten had she stopped. ---
**Author:** ![Nutty\_Bunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d07c76/32.png) [@Nutty\_Bunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nutty_Bunny)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/39 "2003-05-16T13:06:31Z")
What if the person in question was a “hot chick”? What would you have bitched about then? Probably the fact that she hit your car and ran, and nothing else. > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Keith Berry_\*\*But why do these people BREED? This gigantic, glanduar-disadvantaged whore is going to begat many gigantic, glandular-disadvantaged spawn who will use their short, pathetic lives to talk aloud in movie theatres, harrass gas station attendents, collect welfare, serve prison sentences for drug usage, and drive away from car accidents. \*\* And to imply that because she’s fat, you know enough about her that you can make judgments about her lifestyle is more offensive than you simply calling her a “fat bitch”. I’m fat, does that mean everyone thinks I’m dirty and I smell bad and on welfare? You may come back and say, “Well, I meant that the person who would hit and run is a dirtbag.” But, unfortuneately, you made it abundantly clear in the quoted passage that is was her fat that made you say those things by talking about her and her children’s bodies and not about her hitting your car. Not that your fat-bashing excuses her. She’s clearly a rotten bitch. That sucks about your car. My husband’s two-week old car was sideswiped and he still has the dents. Assholes are naturally drawn to new cars for some reason. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614/40 "2003-05-16T13:10:47Z")
Damn—I wish I’d thought of “Shallowina” for my Board name! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fat-moronic-bitch-who-bumped-my-brand-new-car/175614.md?page=3)