# The FBI is on the case in Nigeria **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 24, 2009, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793 "2009-01-24T16:02:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/1 "2009-01-24T16:02:57Z")
Well, it must be! Right? When one receives an urgent message from “ROBERT S. MUELLER (F.B.I GOVERNOR) WASHINGTON D.C \” – an email with the arresting headline: “[!! SPAM] OFFICIAL LETTER FROM THE F.B.I OFFICE WASHINGTON D.C”. Um, er, that “spam” bit was added by my antivirus – but what does it know? How can it comprehend the importance of a message like this? > [@](#): > > ROBERT MUELLER III > EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR FBI > FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION WASHINGTON DC. > Email: [fbioffice@fed-bureau-investigations.org](mailto:fbioffice@fed-bureau-investigations.org) > FBI SEEKING TO WIRETAP INTERNET > > Attention: > > We believe this notification meets you in a very good state of mind and health. We the Federal bureau of investigation (FBI) Washington, DC in conjunction with some other relevant Investigation Agencies here in the United States of America have recently been informed through our Global intelligence monitoring network that you presently have a transaction going on with the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) as regards to your over-due contract payment which was fully endorsed in your favour accordingly. > > It might interest you to know that we have taken out time in screening through this project as stipulated on our protocol of operation and have finally confirmed that your contract payment is 100% genuine and hitch free from all facet and of which you have the lawful right to claim your payment without further delay. Having said all these we will further advise that you go ahead in dealing with the Central Bank office accordingly as we will be monitoring all their activities with you as well as your correspondence at all level. > > Also be informed that we recently had a meeting with the Executive Governor of the Central Bank of Nigeria in the name Prof. Charles C. Soludo, and Mr Aruna borokini (The Financial Secretary) along with some of the top officials of the Ministry regarding your case and they made us understand that your file has been held in abase depending on when you personally come for the claim. They also told us that the only problem they are facing right now is that some unscrupulous elements are using this project as an avenue to Scam innocent people off their hard earned money by impersonating the Executive Governor and the Central Bank office. > > We were also made to understand that a lady with name Mrs. Joan C.Bailey from OHIO has already contacted them and also presented to them all the necessary documentations evidencing your claim purported to have been signed personally by you prior to the release of your contract fund valued at about US$12,500,000.00 (Twelve million five hundred thousand United States Dollars), but the Central Bank office did the wise thing by insisting on hearing from you personally before they go ahead on wiring your fund to the Bank information’s which was forwarded to them by the above named Lady, so that was the main reason why they contacted us so as to assist them in making the investigations. > > They further informed us that we should warn our dear citizens who must have been informed of the contract payment which was awarded to the from the Central Bank of Nigeria, to be very careful prior to these irregularities so that they don’t fall victim to this ugly circumstance anymore. And incase you are already dealing with anybody or office claiming to be from the Central Bank of Nigeria, you are advised to STOP further contact with them in your best interest and then contact immediately the real office of the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) only with the below information accordingly. > > NAME: MR ARUNA BOROKINI (FINANCIAL SECRETARY CBN) > > OFFICE ADDRESS: CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA. > CORPORATE HEAD QUARTERS, > TINUBU SQUARE, > LAGOS. > > TEL: +234-807-757-3222 > > OFFICE EMAIL: [centralbnkofng@live.com](mailto:centralbnkofng@live.com) > > PRIVATE EMAIL: [arunaborokini001@yahoo.com](mailto:arunaborokini001@yahoo.com) > NOTE: In your best interest, any message that doesn’t come from the above official email address and phone numbers should not be replied to and should be disregarded accordingly for security reasons. Meanwhile, we will advice that you contact the Central Bank office immediately with the above email address and request that they attend to your payment file as directed so as to enable you receive your contract payment accordingly. > > Ensure you follow all their procedure as may be required by them as that will further help hasten up the whole procedures as regards to the transfer of your payment to you as designated. Also have in mind that the Central Bank of Nigeria equally have their own protocol of operation as stipulated on their banking terms. Once again, we will advise that you contact them with the above email address and make sure you forward to them all the necessary informations as follows: full name, address, phone no, and your banking informations, which they may require from you prior to the release of your fund to you accordingly. > > All modalities has already been worked out even before you were contacted and note that we will be monitoring all your dealings with them as you proceed so you don’t have anything to worry about. All we require from you henceforth is an update so as to enable us be on track with you and the Central Bank of Nigeria. Without wasting much time, we advice you to contact them immediately with the above email address so as to enable them attend to your case accordingly without any further delay as time is already running out. In case you need any more information in relation with this notification, feel free to get back to us so that we can brief you more as we are here to guide you during and after this project has been completely perfected and you have received your contract fund as stated. > > NOTE: YOU ARE REQUIRED TO RECONFIRM THIS BELOW DETAILS TO THE BANK BEFORE THEY COULD COMMENCE ON THE PROCESSES ON YOUR PAYMENT FILE. > > YOUR FULL NAME: > YOUR ADDRESS: > OCCUPATION: > BANKING INFORMATIONS: > PHONE/FAX NUMBER: > A SCAN COPY OF YOUR INTL PASSPORT/DRIVERS LICENCE > > Thank you very much for your anticipated co-operation in advance as we earnestly await your urgent response to this matter. > > Best Regards, > Robert S. Mueller III > Federal Bureau of Investigation > J. Edgar Hoover Building > 935 Pennsylvania Avenue, > NW Washington, D.C. > 20535 > -0001, USA > Email: [fbioffice@fed-bureau-investigations.org](mailto:fbioffice@fed-bureau-investigations.org) Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must hasten, nay, rush to carry out these vital instructions and do my patriotic bit to stop those evil Nigerian scammers! ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/2 "2009-01-24T16:47:50Z")
I find it hysterical that they want a scan of the international drivers license … I have one, it is simply a heavy paperstock folder with the information from the regular drivers license copied into the right blanks, not even a picture. I got mine made at AAA here in Hartford … How fun would it be to send a scan of one where you carefully edited out the original data and put in pure bullshit info =) ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/3 "2009-01-24T17:24:03Z")
Man, I can’t even get a pinky wave from Cecil Adams, and you merit the personal attention of Robert freaking Mueller! ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/4 "2009-01-24T19:15:05Z")
Scum of the fucking earth. (the Nigerians, not you) They clearly have internet access, why aren’t they busy creating the next Google or taking online courses in medicine and law so they can make their shithole of a country a better place instead of putting all their time and energy trying to sucker people into scams? Yeah yeah it’s all good for a laugh to us but it just bugs me when people waste their lives as parasites instead of trying to work for something better for themselves. ---
**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/5 "2009-01-24T21:58:53Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > Scum of the fucking earth. (the Nigerians, not you) They clearly have internet access, why aren’t they busy creating the next Google or taking online courses in medicine and law so they can make their shithole of a country a better place instead of putting all their time and energy trying to sucker people into scams? > > Yeah yeah it’s all good for a laugh to us but it just bugs me when people waste their lives as parasites instead of trying to work for something better for themselves. What kind of evil, heartless, capitalist SOB are you? Don’t you know that progress and development in Africa is impossible due to centuries of exploitation by white European colonial policies? You should feel priveleged to give up the cash you have stolen from the masses (by pandering to the commands of the running-dog ruling class oligarchs!) and donate it to the Africans suffering from centuries of oppression! But no! Selfish capitalists like you force these poor Nigerians to resort to degrading scams and schemes instead of just having money bequeathed to them as is their due. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/6 "2009-01-24T22:01:44Z")
“The name’s Spondular. Crandal Spondular. I’m with the FBI.” ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2009, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/7 "2009-01-24T23:06:02Z")
> [@ExTank](#): > > What kind of evil, heartless, capitalist SOB are you? Don’t you know that progress and development in Africa is impossible due to centuries of exploitation by white European colonial policies? > > You should feel priveleged to give up the cash you have stolen from the masses (by pandering to the commands of the running-dog ruling class oligarchs!) and donate it to the Africans suffering from centuries of oppression! > > But no! Selfish capitalists like you force these poor Nigerians to resort to degrading scams and schemes instead of just having money bequeathed to them as is their due. Yeah yeah, I’ve heard it all before: it’s the white man’s fault and they really have no other choice, the poor victims that they are. I am guessing this post is meant tongue-in-cheek and you understand the problem with this viewpoint. ---
**Author:** ![Euryphaessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Euryphaessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euryphaessa)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2009, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/8 "2009-01-25T03:59:17Z")
Ooh, I got this one too! I was saving it, hoping I could think of a way to fuck with them, but Hotmail deleted it automatically after seven days. I weep for the lost opportunities. Oh, and this is apropos of absolutely nothing, but whenever I play NHL 08 on Dynasty Mode, my GM’s name is always Crandall Spondular. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2009, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/9 "2009-01-25T05:09:13Z")
Well, dayyum… Now the Benin Republic is getting into the act! Although their level of sophistication leaves something to be desired: > [@](#): > > Attn Benficiary > > I,AM,REV.John EZE, the Driector of Credit Bank Benin Republic. This is to brin > g to your notice that, I, have paid the fee of your ATM CARD, because the ATM- > card worth $5.4,M USD has less a month to expire and when it expires the money > will go into Government reserve. With that I decided to help you pay the mone > y so that the ATM CARD will not expire,because, I know when you get your ATM C > ARD definitely you must compensate me. > > Now, your ATM CARD has been deposited with ups Courier for delivery direct to > your doorstep.therefore, I, want you to contact ups Courier Company with your > Full Contact informations, so that they can deliver your ATM CARD to your desi > gnated address without any delay. Like I, stated earlier, The delivery charges > has been paid but i did not pay their official keeping fees which is $105 sin > ce they refused. > because, the Reasons they refusal is that they do not know when you will conta > ct them. As of now, I, deposited it on 12th of jan 2009 therefore, try to cont > act them immedaitly to aviod any increase the securitye keeping fee ok.MEAN WH > ILE DON,T FORGET TO GIVE THEM , > > YOUR NAME ======== > Your home ADRESS ======= > YOUR conutry ========= > YOUR PHON NO ======== > YOUR AGE ======= > > YOUR COPY OF ID CARD Below is their Contact Informations, Contact Person: DR V > ICTOR NELLY the dirctor UPS Courier Company Email: (united\_stateparcelservice11 > @live.fr) Tel: +229-93-22-29-19 let me know immediately you rececived your atm > card. > Regard > JOHN EZE > > –\<@nifty広告\>--------------- > SQUARE ENIX×＠niftyのコラボが実現！ 数量限定アイテムも要チェック！ > [http://track.nifty.com/tr/ad/a2y/OTr](http://track.nifty.com/tr/ad/a2y/OTr) ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2009, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/10 "2009-01-25T05:12:41Z")
More importantly, are the FBI investigating this [Nigerian crime](http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5iD60gDx_KfkSillZ51I2rVJ2M8OQD95T73L00)? > [@](#): > > One of Nigeria’s biggest daily newspapers reported that police implicated a goat in an attempted automobile theft. In a front-page article on Friday, the Vanguard newspaper said that two men tried to steal a Mazda car two days earlier in Kwara State, with one suspect transforming himself into a goat as vigilantes cornered him. ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2009, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/11 "2009-01-25T05:19:03Z")
I got this gem today: Attn:Sir/ma. How are you today and hope all is well with you and family?You may not understand why this mail came to you,but i will implore you to take your time to carefully go through this mail. We have been having a meeting for the pass 7 months which ended 4 days ago at our office head quarters New York(UNITED NATIONS). This email is to all the people that feel they have been scammed in any part of the world,the UNITED NATION have agreed to compensate them with the sum of US$ 100,000. This includes every foreign contractors that may have not received their contract sum, and people that have had an unfinished transaction or international businesses that failed due to Government problems etc. We found your name in our list and that is why we are contacting you,this have been agreed upon and has been signed. You are advised to contact Mr. Jim Ovia of ZENITH BANK NIGERIA PLC, as he is our representative in Nigeria, contact him immediately for your Cheque/International Bank Draft of USD$ 100,000. This funds are in a Bank Draft for security purpose OK? so he will send it to you and you can clear it at any bank of your choice. Therefore, you should send him your full Name and telephone number/your correct mailing address where you want him to send the Draft to you. Contact:Mr. Jim Ovia immediately for your Cheque: Person to Contact Mr. Jim Ovia Thanks and God bless you and your family.Hoping to hear from you as soon as you cash your Bank Draft. Making the world a better place. Regards, Mr. Kofi Anan Former Secretary (UNITED NATIONS). GOOD NEWS FROM UNITED NATIONS ---
**Author:** ![KGS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/90ced4/32.png) [@KGS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KGS)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2009, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/12 "2009-01-25T07:15:45Z")
I’m just happy to know the FBI cares about my good state of mind and health. They had me worried. ---
**Author:** ![Creaky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e68b1a/32.png) [@Creaky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Creaky)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2009, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/13 "2009-01-25T16:07:37Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > More importantly, are the FBI investigating this [Nigerian crime](http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5iD60gDx_KfkSillZ51I2rVJ2M8OQD95T73L00)? > > Quote: > One of Nigeria’s biggest daily newspapers reported that police implicated a goat in an attempted automobile theft. In a front-page article on Friday, the Vanguard newspaper said that two men tried to steal a Mazda car two days earlier in Kwara State, with one suspect transforming himself into a goat as vigilantes cornered him. Holy crap, that’s hilarious. Let’s just hope the bad guys here don’t figure out how to do that. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2009, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/14 "2009-01-25T17:05:25Z")
> [@Creaky](#): > > Holy crap, that’s hilarious. > > Let’s just hope the bad guys here don’t figure out how to do that. :eek: Well in some parts of the southeastern US or Mexico goat is considered a great meat for BBQ. Just saying… ---
**Author:** ![Creaky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e68b1a/32.png) [@Creaky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Creaky)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2009, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-fbi-is-on-the-case-in-nigeria/482793/15 "2009-01-26T02:48:24Z")
> [@Rick](#): > > Well in some parts of the southeastern US or Mexico goat is considered a great meat for BBQ. > Just saying… Now, that’s my kind of due process! I’m kidding, I’m kidding. 😃