# The feelings fallacy

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-feelings-fallacy/131415>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [October 8, 2002, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-feelings-fallacy/131415 "2002-10-08T18:48:07Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 1\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![Abe\_Babe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3ab097/32.png) [@Abe\_Babe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abe_Babe)\
**Post date:** [October 10, 2002, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-feelings-fallacy/131415/41 "2002-10-10T21:38:41Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by SPOOFE \*  
> \*\*You can always have your consciousness transferred onto a microchip and transfer your person into a robotic body. Then you’ll be Cyber-Scylla, the heartless, clinical machine, immune to feelings and emotions… striking fear into the hearts of evildoers everywhere… \*\*

You mean he’d become a Republican? 😉

Using the gobear example, I disagree with the statement that being accosted by some bigots would not hurt his feelings. It would almost certainly produce anger, which is a form of having his feelings hurt. It would also probably produce sadness that such people haven’t been bred out of the gene pool. It’s not that he is “letting” these people get the better of him. Certain comments/insults/actions whatever would produce hurt feelings in anybody.

That said, there are times when you _should_ hurt somebody’s feelings. My oldest daughter is almost six, and when she does something significantly wrong, the missus and I don’t belittle her or call her names, but we most certainly will end up hurting her feelings (often by letting her know she hurt our feelings or the victim’s feelings). That’s part of teaching or disciplining.

This guy needed to have his feelings hurt. He had continuously been taking advantage of the company, and needed disciplining. The way you handled it was completely appropriate. Inappropriately would have included something along the lines of making light of his bad family situation, or denigrating his heritage or family.

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