# The following is not cat food **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 18, 2004, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780 "2004-10-18T04:18:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/21 "2004-10-18T11:49:43Z")
> [@](#): > > Hey kambuckta watching a cat with bugger-all teeth eat anything is amusing. That head-to-the-side determination always makes me giggle. The excessive slobbering is a bit off-putting though. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![calm\_kiwi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9fc348/32.png) [@calm\_kiwi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/calm_kiwi)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/22 "2004-10-18T11:52:32Z")
What you call slobbering they call do-it-your-self gravy 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/23 "2004-10-18T11:55:18Z")
You’re just fucking gross **calm**. I like your style. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 12:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/24 "2004-10-18T12:01:18Z")
I had a cat that was crazy about cantaloupe. He could eat a small bowl of melon pieces all by himself. You would have thought it was catnip. ---
**Author:** ![calm\_kiwi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9fc348/32.png) [@calm\_kiwi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/calm_kiwi)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/25 "2004-10-18T12:11:31Z")
Gross? You can’t handle gross! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Elza\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Elza\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elza_B)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/26 "2004-10-18T12:51:51Z")
My old girl would eat ANYTHING. She loved Doritos - she’d lick the cheese off of them, then gum them until they were soft enough to chew and swallow. she also loved to lick the coating off of M&Ms - she wouldn’t eat the chocolate, but she loved that candy coating. My parents’ youngest cat is a bread fiend - my parents can’t leave it on the counter because he jumps up on the counter and rips through the bag to get to it. They’ve come downstairs many times to find a ripped bag of bread that’s been half eaten. My two will try anything once. My girl tried to help herself to blueberry preserves last night and actually liked them. I had to hold my toast high in the air to finish it so that she wouldn’t get to it. And we can’t leave anything out or he’ll try to get to it. My husband caught him licking our pumpkin cookies last night on the counter. Ava ---
**Author:** ![Pyrrhonist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/919ad9/32.png) [@Pyrrhonist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pyrrhonist)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/27 "2004-10-18T13:02:26Z")
Our cat MooMoo loves BBQ potato chips. She’ll stick her paw into an open bag and pull them out herself. A few years ago we found an unopened bag of BBQ potato chips on the floor of the pantry, a hole ripped in the bottom, and half chewed chips strewn out. ---
**Author:** ![Lady\_of\_the\_Lake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e19adc/32.png) [@Lady\_of\_the\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lady_of_the_Lake)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/28 "2004-10-18T13:15:13Z")
My cat drinks from my rabbits water bottle. She has her own water bowl, but likes his…pushes the poor guy out of the way to get to it! :eek: And string…but I figured that was a normal ‘cat thing’. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![gum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bbe5ce/32.png) [@gum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gum)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/29 "2004-10-18T13:15:19Z")
I truly wish I could leave _anything_ edible on the counter. If only for a minute. My two spooks _know_ they’re not allowed on the counter, but when I sneak into the kitchen, they’re there. Me yelling: “HAAAAAAAAAA, you STINKO” scares them off for a bit, but a half-eaten sandwich, left alone for a nano-second, is gone in, indeed, a nano-second. Truth is: Broccoli, broadbeans and fudge await the same fate. Don’t you love the way cats listen to you? ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/30 "2004-10-18T14:00:34Z")
Dry dog food isn’t cat food. Hamburger buns are not cat food. Giant blocks of pepper jack cheese are not cat food. Uncooked pasta is not cat food. And yet my cat eats these things. She’s voracious. I had to start keeping the cat food in a tin, because she’d claw through the bag to get at it. Then I had to start keeping the dog food in a tin, because she’d claw through the bag to get at it. Then I had to put baby locks on my cabinets, because she’d climb on the counter, open the doors, knock down boxes of graham crackers and pasta and such, claw them open and pig out. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/31 "2004-10-18T14:23:22Z")
BBQ ribs are not cat food BBQ chicken is not cat food BBQ potato chips are not cat food (Are we seeing a pattern here?) Campbell’s beef vegetable soup is not cat food Plastic grocery bags are not cat food My hairbrush is not cat food Neither is my head. Keep it up, and the cat \*will \* be dog food. ---
**Author:** ![Elza\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Elza\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elza_B)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/32 "2004-10-18T15:02:10Z")
Actually, I realized the most memorable thing my boy has eaten - I was eating pancakes and syrup one night for dinner, and I looked up to see him _stalking_ my plate on the coffee table. He went after the pancakes like they were mice - and in about ten seconds, he had stalked, attacked, and eaten a vicious piece of pancake with syrup. He looked damn proud of himself, too. Apparently, we were under attack and didn’t even realize it. It took him forever to get the syrup off of his paws, though. Ava ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/33 "2004-10-18T15:54:43Z")
To my girlfriend’s cat: Electrical cords are not cat food. Glue is not cat food. Magic marker ink is not cat food. Electricity (from an outlet) is not cat food. Blueberry muffins are not chairs. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/34 "2004-10-18T16:21:41Z")
> [@Fear Itself](#): > > I had a cat that was crazy about cantaloupe. He could eat a small bowl of melon pieces all by himself. You would have thought it was catnip. Heh–me too. First night I got this little alley kitten (a “gift” from my housemate’s friend, who thrust it into my hands), I had no food in the house at all except for an acorn squash and some soy milk. I gave the cat half of my squash, including all the seeds, as well as some soy milk; she gobbled it up, and the next day I bought her some real cat food. She’s about twelve years old now, and her favorite food is still squash or melon seeds. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/35 "2004-10-18T16:32:29Z")
My folks have one of the strangest cats I’ve ever known, in that it won’t eat anything but Friskies cat food. Not the dry stuff, the semi-dry kibble. She’ll sniff a plate or a bowl, but she won’t eat out of it. Just her regular cat food. The dog, on the other hand, will eat anything except spinach, and he\* loves\* tomatoes. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f07891/32.png) [@Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Plastic_Ninja)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/36 "2004-10-18T16:42:28Z")
In my long spate of catlessness, I had forgotten this dance: Little Plastic Ninja: _sits on couch, puts dinner on little table_ Duncan da Cat: _sits up next to Ninja, purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr_ LPN: _pets Duncan, starts eating_ D: _starts slooowly crawling into lap_ LPN: _thinks this is cute but mostly ignores, eating another broccoli frond_ D: _starts subtly leaning in for the food_ LPN: _sees through Duncan’s subtlety, picks up, puts arm’s reach away on the couch_ D: _decides to get rid of all subtlety, making a mad dash for the plate_ LPN: _is tempted to bat cat across room but remembers his bad hip, picks him up and moves him away again_ Repeat last two steps about three more times. Oddly enough, this is the first cat I’ve ever had who does not like ice cream – not even melted ice cream. Just won’t bother with it. He seems fond of…cat food. Granted, the stuff he gets is pretty spiff. Ingredients list looks about as good as human food. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/37 "2004-10-18T16:59:23Z")
Are you sure it’s a kitten you have and not a puppy? ---
**Author:** ![MissTake](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misstake/32/3189_2.png) [@MissTake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissTake)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/38 "2004-10-18T17:03:10Z")
Bern, in her need to prove what a starving waif she is, eats paper and tape. Clee loves french fries and BBQ potato chip. Both, when they are being particularly weird, eat spider webs. It’s not unusual to see one of them in a basement corner licking the wall. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f07891/32.png) [@Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Plastic_Ninja)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/39 "2004-10-18T17:13:19Z")
Oh. And my hair. I brought him up to sleep in my bed with me last night. He proceeded to SPOON me :eek: and then crawl up to my shoulders and neck, give me a quick massage, and then chew on my hair, purring like a chainsaw all the while. Weird cat. ---
**Author:** ![tremorviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47774/32.png) [@tremorviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tremorviolet)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780/40 "2004-10-18T17:14:46Z")
> [@photopat](#): > > My folks have one of the strangest cats I’ve ever known, in that it won’t eat anything but Friskies cat food. Not the dry stuff, the semi-dry kibble. She’ll sniff a plate or a bowl, but she won’t eat out of it. Just her regular cat food. This is how my cats are too. They only eat cat food. I think it’s because I never ever offer them scraps plus I’m a vegetarian so there’s never any yummy meat scraps for them. It is nice not having them beg when I’m eating. My big kitty used to constantly chew through phone cords and only phone cords. It was such a huge pain in the ass in the days before cell phones. Now, he’s switched to the plastic in cheap sports watch bands and he loves to eat the cotton off the Q-tips… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-following-is-not-cat-food/269780.md?page=3)