# The Foulest Possible Cigarettes **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 4, 2004, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422 "2004-02-04T02:31:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Trucido](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@Trucido](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trucido)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/1 "2004-02-04T02:31:04Z")
“But, **Trucido** , alla dose narsty cigarettes is der foulest!” No, I’m looking for really bad stuff, cigarettes that would make even a three-pack-a-day lifer wince at every draw. Shredded manure, cardboard filter, and searing menthol? Perfect! Makhorka tobacco wrapped in toilet paper? Great! So tell me the worst possible cigarettes in wide circulation in Texas, or, more likely, that I can order online. Why do I want to know? I don’t smoke, but all my friends do. I’ve had so much fun watching the complicated negotiations and obligations that they go through borrowing, loaning, and giving cigarettes that I feel like throwing a monkey wrench in the works. Maybe I’ll write a paper or something. “Psychology of Cigarette Bartering Among Young Suburban Americans.” Yeah, that’s the ticket. ---
**Author:** ![fishbicycle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@fishbicycle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fishbicycle)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/2 "2004-02-04T02:52:22Z")
Here are six kinds I wouldn’t smoke again for all the tea in China: From Canada: **Sweet Caporal** unfiltered (if they still make them), **Export** unfiltered, and **Daily Mail** rolling tobacco (floor sweepings at the rejected tobacco barn) From the US: **Top** rolling tobacco (like Daily Mail, it’s a tossup which is more toxic) From Holland: **Drum** rolling tobacco From France: **Gitanes** unfiltered. Cigarettes like this have truly earned the name _coffin nails_. \ ---
**Author:** ![Geoduck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c37758/32.png) [@Geoduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geoduck)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/3 "2004-02-04T03:17:21Z")
I have not smoked a cigarette since 1986, but I clearly remember the horror of trying to smoke those French Gitanes things. ---
**Author:** ![Soul\_Brother\_Number\_Two](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/soul_brother_number_two/32/3515_2.png) [@Soul\_Brother\_Number\_Two](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soul_Brother_Number_Two)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/4 "2004-02-04T03:33:18Z")
In my experience, Gitanes are almost as bad as you can get. Any short unfiltered smog was, for me, unsmokable, where as the long ones were okay. Long ones are Pall Mall and Chesterfields, short ones are Camels and way worse, Luckies. Come to think of it, Luckies may be worse than Gitanes, especially of you buy them from a machine so they are nice and stale. I always enjoyed the heck outta Drum. Geezzzz, I wish I could smoke… ---
**Author:** ![Tentacle\_Monster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ba9def/32.png) [@Tentacle\_Monster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tentacle_Monster)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/5 "2004-02-04T04:07:38Z")
There’s a discount generic food brand called Always Save. All their products share the same basic design: bright yellow packages, with one leg of the A and the L extended down through the S in Save to make a kinda-sorta dollar sign. These people also make cigarettes. In the same bright yellow packaging. I’ve never been brave or desperate enough to try any. ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/6 "2004-02-04T06:53:54Z")
Gauloise were always harsh IIRC. The hideous cigs my grandma used to smoke were Pall Mall or Viceroy, non-filtered but had a filter painted on it for appearances’ sake! ---
**Author:** ![Tedster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4491bb/32.png) [@Tedster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tedster)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/7 "2004-02-04T06:58:29Z")
No no no… Most of the above mentioned ciggies are fine quality, but unfiltered, which do tend to separate the men from the boys. What the OP’er wants is a nasty smoke - might I suggest one of the bargain basement imported brands available online for $7 - $10 a carton. Stale Chinese floor sweepings, can’t get much worse than that. ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/8 "2004-02-04T07:42:45Z")
> [@fishbicycle](#): > > Here are six kinds I wouldn’t smoke again for all the tea in China: > > From Canada: **Sweet Caporal** unfiltered (if they still make them), **Export** unfiltered, and **Daily Mail** rolling tobacco (floor sweepings at the rejected tobacco barn) I haven’t seen a Sweet Caps in ages (filtered or unfiltered), I don’t know if they still make them. Unfiltered Export is still available and I never heard of Daily Mail rolling tobacco (I smoke Players rolling tobacco myself), you might want to try British Consol if you can find it, the brand has lost much of its former popularity, so you’re almost guaranteed to get stale tobacco. > [@](#): > > From Holland: **Drum** rolling tobacco > > From France: **Gitanes** unfiltered. I kinda like Drum myself, once in a while, and France is not the only country making Gitanes, we grow and make our own here also (it’s also available as rolling tobacco), but I have to admit it is an acquired taste. For foul cigarettes, you might try to find Russian papirossa (spelling ?), they make Gitanes seem divine in comparaison. ---
**Author:** ![Trucido](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@Trucido](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trucido)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/9 "2004-02-04T07:56:01Z")
All fine ideas. I suspect that filterless cigarettes would work for a little while, but they would become used to that too quickly. Where might I order online the really nasty stuff, like the stale Chinese floor sweepings or Russian cigarettes? Failing that, though, it’s unfiltered Gitanes or Gauloises for the moochers, because those are the only ones mentioned that I can find. Their lungs will hate me. ---
**Author:** ![quahha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/bb73d2/32.png) [@quahha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quahha)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 10:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/10 "2004-02-04T10:55:01Z")
I played in a band with a guy who smoked “Magic” brand herbal cigs. They smelled so foul that club owners would not let us play again unless he agreed to not smoke them. ---
**Author:** ![Scarf-Ace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Scarf-Ace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarf-Ace)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/11 "2004-02-04T11:08:40Z")
What you _really_ want is “beedies”. I don’t know if thats just a local slang term for these obnoxious smokes, but you can try looking in your local head shop. They come in plastic bags of 20 or so and are actually conically rolled dried leaves (very thick) containing an anonymous blend of lung damage. I was duped into smoking them for a while, mainly due to novelty value, thinking I was cool, but gave them up when I realised the light-headed rush I got from them was probably asphyxiation. [hijack]Has anyone else smoked these? Tell me i’m not the only dumb-ass here…[/hijack] ---
**Author:** ![cherry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cherry)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/12 "2004-02-04T14:09:27Z")
I was going to say beedies too, they are indian cigarettes, usually cops will stop you on the street because they look like joints but they are actually cigarettes. ---
**Author:** ![cherry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cherry)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/13 "2004-02-04T14:16:28Z")
Actually I wanted to say that when I did smoke I thought that bidis and hookas tasted okay, on the other hand, Rothmans blue and Dunhill in Canada are gross, and I started on Silk Cuts/Benson and Hedges as my frame of what I did like. I had a cigarette from Indonesia that was disgusting I couldnt finish it. ---
**Author:** ![Algorithm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/algorithm/32/12204_2.png) [@Algorithm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algorithm)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/14 "2004-02-04T14:18:32Z")
> [@Meta-Gumble](#): > > [hijack]Has anyone else smoked these? Tell me i’m not the only dumb-ass here…[/hijack] Yeah, I smoked those for awhile. I got the same lightheaded feeling and attributed it to the supposedly higher nicotine content. The main reason I smoked them was that the flavored ebony leaves that hold the tobacco were great for rolling joints in. When I first unrolled one of the leaves I was surprised to find there was actually a little filter hidden inside of it. ---
**Author:** ![Dante](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dante/32/9673_2.png) [@Dante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/15 "2004-02-04T15:07:32Z")
If you’re in Guyana at any time, stop by a street vendor and pick up a couple of cigarettes. They have no markings. They have no logo. They have no name. Man, they are **foul**! I was staying down there with a friend and his family over Christmas in '93, and they dared me to try them. Then they double dog dared me. Well, I couldn’t have that… **Cough, cough, hack, sputter…ACK!** Nasty. Doubt you can order them online though. ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/16 "2004-02-04T15:15:37Z")
I know a guy who smokes Bull Durhams. He says nobody ever borrows a cig from him more than once. ---
**Author:** ![TelcontarStorm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3ab097/32.png) [@TelcontarStorm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TelcontarStorm)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/17 "2004-02-04T15:36:08Z")
OPer, Youy can ruin the flavor of any good cigarette merely by letting them sit around a few days and get dried out. Especialy a pack of **Rodgers** _shutter_ > [@fishbicycle](#): > > From the US: **Top** rolling tobacco (like Daily Mail, it’s a tossup which is more toxic. > \ Ever try **Bugler**? (The stuff is so bad I can’t even remember the correct spelling!) Blue packaging. Tobacco is indigenous to the New World. It is grown everywhere in the world. Find the cigarette tobacco grown outside of the Americas and there you will consistantly find the worst smokes. The absolutly worst I can remember is a Brittish smoke that was oval shaped insted of round, no filter. It probly has been almost 20 years since I had one and I’d prefer to forget the experience. ---
**Author:** ![fishbicycle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@fishbicycle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fishbicycle)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/18 "2004-02-04T17:46:12Z")
> [@TelcontarStorm](#): > > Ever try **Bugler**? (The stuff is so bad I can’t even remember the correct spelling!) Blue packaging. No, but I’ve seen it in the stores, and I’ve seen winos smoking it, and Top. Generally, if you see winos smoking a particular brand, it’s a pretty good indication that you don’t need to try it yourself! I stayed at Salvation Army hostels on a hitchhiking trip across Canada once, and I wish I could erase from my brain the memory of the smell of the BO, rancid foot stench, booze, vomit and Daily Mail smoke. Unfortunately, it’s never gonna go away. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/19 "2004-02-04T20:16:07Z")
You could always check out [eBay](http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3270865832&category=44). I’m not a smoker, but you know a ten year old pack of Russian smokes has to be pretty bad. ---
**Author:** ![Scarf-Ace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Scarf-Ace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarf-Ace)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2004, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422/20 "2004-02-04T20:43:21Z")
Algorithm: > [@](#): > > When I first unrolled one of the leaves I was surprised to find there was actually a little filter hidden inside of it. Wow you must have got the “luxury” variety, the ones I smoked were filter free. I never tried this myself but I had a friend who smoked a cinammon stick to see if he could get high. Judging by the smell, black smoke and coughing it had to be fairly rank. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-foulest-possible-cigarettes/227422.md?page=2)