# The funniest graffito I've ever seen... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 10, 1999, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272 "1999-12-10T23:46:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 1999, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/1 "1999-12-10T23:46:00Z")
…went like this: I can’t eat breakfast Because I’m thinking of you. I can’t eat lunch Because I’m thinking of you. I can’t eat dinner Because I’m thinking of you. I can’t sleep Because I’m hungry. Second funniest is now my sig. Anybody else got a really good one? * * * Lyxdesics of the lowrd untie! ---
**Author:** ![leafrog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cab0a1/32.png) [@leafrog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leafrog)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/2 "1999-12-11T00:20:00Z")
In High School, sitting in the library at one of those little privacy carols (sp?), I looked up and noticed that someone had written: Godot, Waited and waited, but you never showed. What gives? I got the giggles so hard I had to leave the library. * * * Make it fit. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/3 "1999-12-11T00:28:00Z")
First day at the University, I sat down in a stall and noticed that someone had scrawled in huge letters on the inside of the door: “CALL YOUR MOTHER!” Perhaps not the best joke, but kinda surreally poignant and eerie. ---
**Author:** ![elelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@elelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elelle)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/4 "1999-12-11T01:13:00Z")
Restroom graffiti: Here I sit Buns aflexin’ Just gave birth To another Texan. HAR… ---
**Author:** ![voguevixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5ac83/32.png) [@voguevixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voguevixen)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/5 "1999-12-11T03:03:00Z")
There’s a freeway overpass my husband and I go under on our way to his mother’s in Sacramento. (I think it’s on 580.) It always says something amusing, our personal favorite: LOVE STINKS! (and next to it in another color and writing style): Yeah yeah! Talk about songs getting stuck in your head! (We always refer to this as the “love stinks” bridge. :)) * * * "There’s a snake in my boot! ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/6 "1999-12-11T03:04:00Z")
Enjoyable on several levels, this was written in under the standard: **Jesus Saves** . . . . _Moses Invests_ ---
**Author:** ![elelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@elelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elelle)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/7 "1999-12-11T03:39:00Z")
This was in the UNC-Chapel Hill library restroom for awhile in the 80s, a rewrite of native son James Taylor: In my mind, I’m going to her vagina Can’t you just see her mons shine Can’t you just feel her hips grind Ain’t it just like a gal of mine To want it from behind… Best part is about UNC, it stayed up a long time. ---
**Author:** ![The\_LION](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8e7dd6/32.png) [@The\_LION](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_LION)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/8 "1999-12-11T03:47:00Z")
elelle NOT FUNNY !!! T LION A Texan and proud of it! ---
**Author:** ![melanietarrant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/898d66/32.png) [@melanietarrant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/melanietarrant)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/9 "1999-12-11T05:40:00Z")
i saw this written on the walls in a restroom i’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal labotomy ---
**Author:** ![elelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@elelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elelle)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/10 "1999-12-11T05:49:00Z")
LION: I wavered with the disclaimer, BUT, even being a Texas fan, still love the rhyme with “aflexin”. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 9:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/11 "1999-12-11T09:25:00Z")
In the basement of the Architecture Building of the University of Texas at Austin, there is a set of steps that lead downward into a blank wall–it looks like a doorway that has been bricked up and plastered over. On the wall, somebody has scrawled, “For the love of God, Montresor!” DHR ---
**Author:** ![Luxus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/58f4c7/32.png) [@Luxus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Luxus)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 11:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/12 "1999-12-11T11:46:00Z")
In one of the bathrooms in the Reed College library there is an ongoing graffiti, written in the spaces of grout between the tiles (it takes up an entire wall) dedicated to using the word “grout” creatively in a sentence: i.e. Peter the Grout, Grout Scott, ect. Not extremly funny but there are some pretty creative ones. ---
**Author:** ![Luxus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/58f4c7/32.png) [@Luxus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Luxus)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 11:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/13 "1999-12-11T11:46:00Z")
In one of the bathrooms in the Reed College library there is an ongoing graffiti, written in the spaces of grout between the tiles (it takes up an entire wall) dedicated to using the word “grout” creatively in a sentence: i.e. Peter the Grout, Grout Scott, ect. Not extremly funny but there are some pretty creative ones. ---
**Author:** ![meek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce73a5/32.png) [@meek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meek)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/14 "1999-12-11T11:59:00Z")
In a roadside tavern bathroom stall door, scratched deep into the metal door was the words… **"I FUCKED YOUR MOTHER!".** Penciled very neatly underneath it was… _“Go home Dad, you’re drunk.”_ * * * Wishing all you at the SDMB Happy Xmas and a GREAT 2000 and beyond! ---
**Author:** ![AzRaek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/azraek/32/16739_2.png) [@AzRaek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AzRaek)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/15 "1999-12-11T14:31:00Z")
Damn, I should have gone to college, if only for the grafitti. The funniest one I’ve seen: someone spraypainted a water tank with “I LOVE YOU MOM” She must be proud. * * * John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt. That’s my name too. Wait, no it isn’t. ---
**Author:** ![PatrickM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7feea3/32.png) [@PatrickM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickM)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/16 "1999-12-11T15:16:00Z")
In Boston in the 1970’s I say: Jesus Saves! And Esposito Scores on the Rebound! ---
**Author:** ![PatrickM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7feea3/32.png) [@PatrickM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickM)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/17 "1999-12-11T15:17:00Z")
Damn typos: I saw, not say. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/18 "1999-12-11T15:57:00Z")
My all-time favorite is this: “I LOVE YOU SWEATHEART!” painted in enormous letters on a freeway overpass. Continuing the bathroom stall theme, one such stall in high school read, “In days of old, When knights were bold, And rubbers weren’t invented, Men tied a sock Around their cock And babies were prevented!” I wonder how many high schoolers actually tried that one. * * * I used to think the world was against me. Now I know better. Some of the smaller countries are neutral. [Laura’s Stuff and Things](http://members.aol.com/lrconaway) ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/19 "1999-12-11T15:58:00Z")
A railroad bridge over the John C Lodge Expressway in Detroit, through the late sixties and early seventies, bore the message (one letter to a framed panel) L I O N E L. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 1999, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/20 "1999-12-11T16:47:00Z")
My Pop told me this one, and I didn’t believe him 'til many years later when I saw a photo of it in a “History of American Ballparks”. The Phillies, always wanting to make a buck, had erected a billboard in right field at the old Baker Bowl. Selling the advertising space to a soap company, it proudly bore the slogan, “The Phillies use Lifebouy soap.” Halfway through the season, when the Philies were all but mathematicaly eliminated from the pennant race, an intrepid “hacker of the day” added a hastily painted postscript… “and they still stink.” It stayed up there for the rest of the season. Apparently the Lifebouy folks and the Philies were to cheap to replace it. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272.md?page=2)