# The funniest graffito I've ever seen... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 10, 1999, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272 "1999-12-10T23:46:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![SSgtBaloo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@SSgtBaloo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSgtBaloo)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 1999, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/81 "1999-12-27T23:28:00Z")
When I went to Jr. College the restrooms had large pads of white paper (about the size of a newspaper front page) bolted to the inside of the stall doors and over the urinals. I presume that this was an attempt to ensure that the graffitti would be confined to a disposable surface. One day, my friend told me about a graffitti he saw that read as follows: \\\“God is Dead.” \_Nietsche_\\ In different handwriting right beneath it was written: \\\“Nietsche is dead.” \\_God_\ When I went to check, the janitors had been through and pulled down the “full” sheets, so I couldn’t find it. –Baloo * * * I once lost my corkscrew and had to live on food and water for several days -W.C. Fields [http://members.tripod.com/~Bob\_Baloo/index.htm](http://members.tripod.com/~Bob_Baloo/index.htm) ---
**Author:** ![Chinaco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71c47a/32.png) [@Chinaco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chinaco)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 1999, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/82 "1999-12-28T19:23:00Z")
At East Carolina University, North Carolina, one of the women’s dorms is called “Fleming Hall” with the name in big letters on the roof. On several occasions some wiseguy or other has managed to get up on the roof and switch the E and the A so it would read “Flaming Hell” instead. What a hoot… * * * I once lost my corkscrew and had to live on food and water for several days." --W.C. Fields ---
**Author:** ![Narile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@Narile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Narile)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 1999, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/83 "1999-12-29T05:52:00Z")
Once at Wright State saw a sign on a door that was meant to inform students that a class had been moved to another room. The sign read: Grief and Depression have been moved to Room 129. Underneath someone had written: Happiness and Joy have been canceled indefinitely. Another fun one is done by taking two Wright-State University stick on decals, and a School of Nursing one and altering it so you get a decal that reads: Wright-State-Wrong-University. * * * \>\>Being Chaotic Evil means never having to say your sorry…unless the other guy is bigger than you.\<\< —The dragon observes ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 1999, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/84 "1999-12-29T20:36:00Z")
Two that made me giggle— In a Baltimore restaurant, the “Hostess Will Seat You” sign was altered to read, “Hostess Will eat You.” And on a New York bus, the “Press Yellow Tape for Next Stop” read, when I saw it, " Yell for Next Stop." ---
**Author:** ![spankboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@spankboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spankboy)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 1999, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/85 "1999-12-31T12:04:00Z")
Susanville, California, has a restaurant named the ‘Country Kitchen’, just up the road from the prison. I remember that their slogan was ‘A good place to fill your family’. Of course, someone altered it to ‘A good place to kill your family’. * * * From Hell’s heart, I stab at thee- ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2000, 9:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/86 "2000-03-26T09:08:00Z")
I saw this on one of those hot air hand dryers: Instructions: 1.press button 2.rub hands under hot air 3.( altered to read) wipe hands on pants and in a stall at Towson University ( when it was still Towson State) Jesus Saves! at 1st National Bank! * * * Cecil said it. I believe it. That settles it. ---
**Author:** ![Crystalguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dbc845/32.png) [@Crystalguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crystalguy)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2000, 11:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/87 "2000-03-26T11:33:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by The LION: > \*\*elelle > > NOT FUNNY !!! > > T LION > > A Texan and proud of it!\*\* Absolutely!! * * * Crystalguy ---
**Author:** ![casdave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@casdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/casdave)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2000, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/88 "2000-03-26T15:38:00Z")
On a motorway bridge on the M1 northbound in the UK in huge letters and during a major recession. ITS GRIM UP NORTH This become the title of the KLF’s song. ---
**Author:** ![dekayx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c6cbf5/32.png) [@dekayx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dekayx)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2000, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/89 "2000-03-26T16:02:00Z")
alomg the lines of Mojo’s, I saw this one at the races- W e A ll L ook L ike A ssholes C hasing E arnhart ---
**Author:** ![Spoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@Spoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoke)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2000, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/90 "2000-03-26T16:04:00Z")
OK, I have several. From a library carrel at Duke’s Perkins Library: > [@](#): > > QUESTION AUTHORITY!! > > (And then below that, in different handwriting…) > > SAYS WHO??? And for the literary-minded… Perkins Library (can you tell I worked there?) has a sub-sub-basement, with a maze of dark and musty rooms. After winding through there doing some research in old newspapers, I came to a room that had to be the deepest and most hidden away in the bowels of the library. Over the portal to this crypt-like room, someone had penned: > [@](#): > > All hope abandon, ye who enter here! One from a bathroom stall with a lot of other graffitti: > [@](#): > > One would think, from the flow of wit, > That Shakespeare’s ghost comes here to shit! And from an old bus station pay toilet: > [@](#): > > Here I sit, all broken hearted; > Paid to shit, and only farted! ---
**Author:** ![Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/97f17d/32.png) [@Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nu_Vo_Da_Da)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2000, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/91 "2000-03-26T17:18:00Z")
The best graffiti I’ve ever seen is currently decorating the water tower near my college. (Since the 60’s it’s been sort of a tradition to paint the water tower-so much so that the student handbook has a section dedicated to telling you not to) This particular piece of work has been up for over 6 months now, it seems that the administration doesn’t even want to remove a 20+ foot high caricature of the college president from the water tower. Or maybe they just appreciate the work that went into it too much to remove it… * * * Still later, Gerald did a terrible thing to Elsie with a saucepan. ---
**Author:** ![DooWahDiddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9bcb4/32.png) [@DooWahDiddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DooWahDiddy)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/92 "2000-03-27T06:13:00Z")
One of the best photographs I have ever seen, from back in the early 70’s I believe, is of a brick wall with the words CLAPTON IS GOD spraypainted on it. At the very bottom of the photo, you can see a small dog with it’s leg raised, urinating on the wall. * * * Music is harmony, harmony is perfection, perfection is our dream, and our dream is heaven–Amiel ---
**Author:** ![neuro-trash\_grrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3ab097/32.png) [@neuro-trash\_grrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/neuro-trash_grrrl)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/93 "2000-03-27T01:49:00Z")
The walls of our campus radio studio have become totally covered with grafitti of one kind or another. Some of my favorites: Get really stoned! Drink wet cement! When you’re not looking, this is in Spanish. (then underneath, in a different handwriting:) Cuando no estàs mirando, esta es en Español. (next to a phone jack:) Direct line to the president. (with “president” crossed out and “MY ASS!” written in.) (then underneath, in a different handwriting:) Remind me never to use your telephone, then! SATAN (altered to read:) SANTA (further altered to read:) SANTANA * * * Heck is where you go when you don’t believe in Gosh. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Bredin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/96bed5/32.png) [@John\_Bredin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Bredin)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/94 "2000-03-27T19:17:00Z")
In the most recent elections, someone here in Chicago named Schuster ran for office (Congress? General Assembly?) in a very hotly-contested election. One of his ads, a large poster on the side of a railway viaduct over a main street, had some of the letters painted out so that SCHUSTER became S HI TER Every local television station showed the defaced sign by first putting one half on the screen and then the other. They wouldn’t show the whole thing as one picture, but they wanted the audience to put 2 and 2 together, so to speak. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Avumede](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/avumede/32/7235_2.png) [@Avumede](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Avumede)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/95 "2000-03-27T20:39:00Z")
I remember driving from St. Louis to Champaign, IL. I would pass Tuscola, IL, which had a big sign saying “Tuscola! City of pride, growth and opportunity! We make it happen!” After seeing that sign a number of times, you can imagine how amused I was when someone spray painted “Tuscola sucks!” over the next overpass. ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_Naked](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Buck\_Naked](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_Naked)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/96 "2000-03-27T20:43:00Z")
On the walls of some random bar in Pullman Washington, where they used to serve a tray full of beer in shot glasses for $2.00 .10 a piece. They called them dimers… Cunt cunt oh slimy slit All covered in piss and caked with shit A buffalo’s ass should taste as bad But cunt is cunt and must be had. * * * I feel more like I do now than I did when I got here. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Love](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e95f7d/32.png) [@Dr\_Love](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Love)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/97 "2000-03-27T20:47:00Z")
Once me and some friends changed a sign that said, “Haircutters $25 perm special” and changed it to “Haircutter $25 sperm special” the best part was they didn’t change the sign for a week. * * * Dr Love has the answer ---
**Author:** ![zeenard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/85e7bf/32.png) [@zeenard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zeenard)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/98 "2000-03-28T09:32:00Z")
another restroom graffiti: some people come here sit and think I come here shit and stink ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 10:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/99 "2000-03-28T10:33:00Z")
on a restroom door in Dundalk IT. (about 2/3 of the way up the door) * * * (see if you can get over the line) * * * “I’m a rebel, soul rebel. I’m a capturer, soul adventurer” ~Bob Marley [wanna see me?](http://www.angelfire.com/wrestling/elgraplero/me.jpg) Last picture. Thats me on the left. Blue shirt. I dont have the hair colour anymore. ---
**Author:** ![Enright3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/enright3/32/2897_2.png) [@Enright3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enright3)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272/100 "2000-03-28T17:47:00Z")
In Tulsa the 169 overpass had “John Loves Michelle Forever” spray painted on it for years. One day it had a single line drawn through it, and “I guess I was wrong” was written underneath it. Not too funny, but I remember it for some reason… This is a teepee to take a pee pee, This is not a wigwam to beat your tom tom. John Smith, he’s our leader, He’s the one who sucks our peter. For a nickle or a dime, he will suck it any time. If no money, that’s the key! John Smith sucks for free! And finally, it was bound to happen sooner or later, I saw a “for a good time” message on a bathroom stall that had an e-mail address instead of a phone number. * * * New and Improved Enright3 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-funniest-graffito-ive-ever-seen/15272.md?page=6)