# The "Garfield" Where Jon Drinks Dog Semen **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 3, 2006, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272 "2006-01-03T20:10:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Last\_Surviving\_Guindon\_Fan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/0ea827/32.png) [@Last\_Surviving\_Guindon\_Fan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Last_Surviving_Guindon_Fan)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2006, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/101 "2006-01-05T19:43:07Z")
> [@Trunk](#): > > I love the last panel. Looks like Jon’s about to tap dat. Jon Arbuckle has done so little tapping he makes Dilbert look like Porfirio Rubirosa. (That was for the really old folks.) Anyway, I just joined this forum after Bup alerted me to this thread. The thread is much funnier than the strip, and it reminds me of the only funny Cathy strip ever: the one in which she “is in the bathroom giving the copier repairman a swirley.” Of course, it was funny only until I learned that a swirley was not a knobjob. ---
**Author:** ![tim314](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim314/32/3468_2.png) [@tim314](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tim314)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2006, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/102 "2006-01-05T21:38:40Z")
The more I think about it, the more obvious it is that it couldn’t _possibly_ be meant to be semen. Even Jon Arbuckle wouldn’t be stupid enough to mistake a cup of semen for a cup of coffee, because the two liquids have completely different colors, plus coffee isn’t that thick. (I’m assuming dog semen looks like human semen – I wouldn’t know.) I’m sure it was meant to be a cup of some dark-colored liquid that looked like coffee – probably some medicine for pregnant dogs. (Obviously, this wouldn’t actually make Jon give birth to a litter, but then again, neither would semen.) ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2006, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/103 "2006-01-05T21:53:13Z")
> [@tim314](#): > > (I’m assuming dog semen looks like human semen – I wouldn’t know.) Semen, like blood, is pretty much the same no matter what it comes out of. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2006, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/104 "2006-01-05T22:03:03Z")
> [@tim314](#): > > (I’m assuming dog semen looks like human semen – I wouldn’t know.) Red rocket! ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2006, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/105 "2006-01-05T22:09:01Z")
> [@fetus](#): > > Semen, like blood, is pretty much the same no matter what it comes out of. As long as it originated on this planet, anyway. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![rainy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c2a13f/32.png) [@rainy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rainy)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2006, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/106 "2006-01-05T22:35:12Z")
> [@fetus](#): > > Semen, like blood, is pretty much the same no matter what it comes out of. There’s something way too matter of fact and knowing about this statement for it not to be errie in a Hannibal Lectur kind of way. \ ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2006, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/107 "2006-01-06T02:00:39Z")
> [@Last Surviving Guindon Fan](#): > > Of course, it was funny only until I learned that a swirley was not a knobjob. _spit take_ ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2006, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/108 "2006-01-06T04:48:57Z")
Okay, let’s be honest. Liz is just making the “healthy puppy” comment to distract from the fact that she is bending over and tempting Jon to “hit her”. There. I said it. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2006, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/109 "2006-01-06T05:40:36Z")
> [@tim314](#): > > (I’m assuming dog semen looks like human semen – I wouldn’t know.) It does. Trust me. Tastes pretty much the same, too. Or so I’ve heard. ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2006, 7:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/110 "2006-01-06T07:30:52Z")
> [@rainy](#): > > There’s something way too matter of fact and knowing about this statement for it not to be errie in a Hannibal Lectur kind of way. Yeah. I’d say you pretty much don’t want to know. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerous\_Nan\_McGrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecd19e/32.png) [@Dangerous\_Nan\_McGrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerous_Nan_McGrew)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2006, 8:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/111 "2006-01-06T08:52:31Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > …steamin’ cup of fido jizz. doo dah, doo dah… /totally stolen from some SDMB thread I read a long time ago ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2006, 8:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/112 "2006-01-06T08:58:28Z")
> [@fetus](#): > > > [@RickJay](#): > > > > Ours too, but we used the Latin “Fuma vas sperma canis.” > > I originally ignored the words “the Latin” and read this in Spanish, and as you can imagine I had a devil of a time figuring out “The dog sperm smokes you go”. In Soviet Russia, dog sperm smokes _you_! ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2006, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/113 "2006-01-08T19:20:28Z")
> [@tim314](#): > > The more I think about it, the more obvious it is that it couldn’t _possibly_ be meant to be semen. Even Jon Arbuckle wouldn’t be stupid enough to mistake a cup of semen for a cup of coffee, because the two liquids have completely different colors, plus coffee isn’t that thick. (I’m assuming dog semen looks like human semen – I wouldn’t know.) I’m sure it was meant to be a cup of some dark-colored liquid that looked like coffee – probably some medicine for pregnant dogs. (Obviously, this wouldn’t actually make Jon give birth to a litter, but then again, neither would semen.) Okay, I hate to be a buzzkill but since everyone is trying to analyze the actual intent: 23 years in the veterinary business and I am not aware of any specific doggie pre-natal vitamins. (Although there may be some marketed to dog breeders.) HOWEVER, there is a common vitamin-iron supplement that is coffee-colored but it smells like liver, not coffee. So maybe Mr. Davis had a pregnant dog that was prescribed this supplement and he assumed it was for just pregnant dogs so he used the “healthy litter” comment for the punchline. The “steamin’ cup of fido jizz” bit is much funnier. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Angel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d26b3c/32.png) [@Johnny\_Angel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Angel)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2006, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/114 "2006-01-08T21:47:47Z")
**Wile E** wrote: > [@](#): > > So maybe Mr. Davis had a pregnant dog that was prescribed this supplement and he assumed it was for just pregnant dogs so he used the “healthy litter” comment for the punchline. I seem to recall that he’s allergic to cats. Wouldn’t that usually mean he’s also allergic to dogs? ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2006, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/115 "2006-01-08T22:11:40Z")
> [@Johnny Angel](#): > > **Wile E** wrote: > > I seem to recall that he’s allergic to cats. Wouldn’t that usually mean he’s also allergic to dogs? Not necessarily, people can be allergic to cats but not dogs. Anyway, I was only speculating. He could have been at a friend’s home and saw their dog vitamins. He could have gone to a pet store for research and saw some dog vitamins. He could have served a guest some coffee and the guest spit it out and cried “Bleargh! That tastes like my pregnant dog’s vitamins!”.\* \*Disclaimer: I am not impugning Mr. Davis’ coffee making skills, I am only speculating. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Angel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d26b3c/32.png) [@Johnny\_Angel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Angel)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2006, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/116 "2006-01-08T22:26:11Z")
> [@Wile E](#): > > \*Disclaimer: I am not impugning Mr. Davis’ coffee making skills, I am only speculating. Oh no. You’re merely suggesting that something about his coffee may have inspired what appears to be a joke about dog semen. ---
**Author:** ![Tenar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@Tenar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenar)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2006, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/117 "2006-01-08T23:01:54Z")
> [@tim314](#): > > The more I think about it, the more obvious it is that it couldn’t _possibly_ be meant to be semen. Even Jon Arbuckle wouldn’t be stupid enough to mistake a cup of semen for a cup of coffee, because the two liquids have completely different colors, plus coffee isn’t that thick. (I’m assuming dog semen looks like human semen – I wouldn’t know.) I’m sure it was meant to be a cup of some dark-colored liquid that looked like coffee – probably some medicine for pregnant dogs. (Obviously, this wouldn’t actually make Jon give birth to a litter, but then again, neither would semen.) I think it’s probable that the cup didn’t contain anything but coffee. The cup is indeed a coffee cup, so, as others have observed, the odds are against the contents being anything animal related. It’s well established in the strip that Liz thinks Jon is a disgusting creep and a pain in the ass, so she probably just said what she said about the puppies to freak him out and teach him not to go gulping down things that don’t belong to him. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2006, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/118 "2006-01-08T23:07:41Z")
> [@Tenar](#): > > The cup is indeed a coffee cup… [Look again](http://web.acsalaska.net/~fmurtley/garfield01a.jpg); it has no handle like a coffee cup. It could be any kind of cup, even a specimen cup, for all the detail a comic strip shows. ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2006, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/119 "2006-01-09T01:29:04Z")
> [@Wile E](#): > > \*Disclaimer: I am not impugning Mr. Davis’ coffee making skills, I am only speculating. Methinks Mr. Davis has bigger problems than his coffee skills. BTW, one of the Google ads tells us of a bowel cleansing system. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2006, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272/120 "2006-01-09T02:05:38Z")
> [@fetus](#): > > BTW, one of the Google ads tells us of a bowel cleansing system. Bwahaha! > [@](#): > > Bowel Detox > Why is bowel detox so vital? See if you need internal cleansing! > > Garfield Party Supplies > Only available here! Garfield party supplies: pinatas, decor, and more. > > Soiling Solutions > Novel Treatment Manuals for Ending Encopresis and Enuresis > > Bowel Movements > Learn more about this new and unique laxative with stool softener. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-garfield-where-jon-drinks-dog-semen/338272.md?page=7)