# The Gauntlet has been thrown! Justin Bieber vs Tom Cruise, in the Octogon... who wins? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 10, 2019, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297 "2019-06-10T13:55:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/61 "2019-06-11T14:24:30Z")
^ You should know, you hunk-a hunk of burning Mod. šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Dale\_Sams](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/779978/32.png) [@Dale\_Sams](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dale_Sams)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/62 "2019-06-11T14:49:11Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Iā€™m amazed at how effective Tom Cruiseā€™s PR is. You guys actually believe he is a Hollywood stuntman in great condition because you heard it from internet tabloid coverage. But of course why would anyone think a nutbag cultist would be dishonest? šŸ˜•:rolleyes: If only there were some kind of footage of him doing stunts. Or of the great shape heā€™s inā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/63 "2019-06-11T14:58:27Z")
> [@Dale\_Sams](#): > > If only there were some kind of footage of him doing stunts. Or of the great shape heā€™s inā€¦ Right. Because movies are totally realistic. Actors donā€™t use makeup or stunt doubles or special effects to make things look different than they really are. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/64 "2019-06-11T15:13:55Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > I donā€™t get the love for Cruise. 56 years old is old for combat sports, and Bieber has a height and reach advantage and is in great shape at least as much as Cruise is. Heā€™ll beat the shit out of Cruise. My thoughts, as wellā€¦but you voted Cruise in the poll, I see. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/65 "2019-06-11T15:18:43Z")
Bieber is 5ā€² 9ā€³, roughly _triple_ Cruiseā€™s height. My money is on the kid. ---
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/66 "2019-06-11T15:23:33Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Iā€™m amazed at how effective Tom Cruiseā€™s PR is. You guys actually believe he is a Hollywood stuntman in great condition because you heard it from internet tabloid coverage. But of course why would anyone think a nutbag cultist would be dishonest? šŸ˜•:rolleyes: This is dismissive and uninformed. He does a lot of his own stunts and lots of training. Check it out: [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/H8-P8sJNHk0/hqdefault.jpg "Collateral Tom Cruise training") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8-P8sJNHk0) The fight training starts at about 2:20. Hip yourself. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/67 "2019-06-11T15:24:44Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Bieber is 5ā€² 9ā€³, roughly _triple_ Cruiseā€™s height. My money is on the kid. Yup. Stacking up Sylvester Stallone, Chuck Norris, and Cruise on top wearing a trench coat they look as tall as full grown man. ---
**Author:** ![garygnu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garygnu/32/2924_2.png) [@garygnu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garygnu)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/68 "2019-06-11T15:32:15Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Right. Because movies are totally realistic. Actors donā€™t use makeup or stunt doubles or special effects to make things look different than they really are. Because Tom Cruise is insane, heā€™s been doing his own stunt work for decades now. He really had climbed Burj Khalifa and hung onto a plane taking off, etc. ---
**Author:** ![Gray\_Ghost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c0e974/32.png) [@Gray\_Ghost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gray_Ghost)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/69 "2019-06-11T15:36:14Z")
Thereā€™s mention upthread of Bieber taking up boxing, ā€˜trainingā€™ with Floyd Merriweather, etcā€¦ Is Bieber a big MMA fan/aficionado like I understand that Joe Rogan, John Cusack and Keanu Reeves are? If MMA is one of Bieberā€™s hobbies and he works diligently at it, then my moneyā€™s on Bieber, for the age issues already mentioned. If not, Tom Cruise is a pretty determined individual. I wouldnā€™t put it past Tom to learn enough MMA in six months to beat anyone that wasnā€™t already skilled in the art. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/70 "2019-06-11T15:37:58Z")
> [@garygnu](#): > > Because Tom Cruise is insane, heā€™s been doing his own stunt work for decades now. He really had climbed Burj Khalifa and hung onto a plane taking off, etc. Sorry, I didnā€™t realize you were there to witness those things. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/71 "2019-06-11T15:48:39Z")
Given that the overwhelming majority of our knowledge comes in the form of ā€œsomething somebody told meā€ā€¦ via books, data, movies, texts, instructional pamphlets, radio, TV, internet, vocal, etcā€¦ insisting upon a first hand witness account is silly. ---
**Author:** ![AlsoNamedBort](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alsonamedbort/32/3213_2.png) [@AlsoNamedBort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AlsoNamedBort)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/72 "2019-06-11T16:28:59Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Sorry, I didnā€™t realize you were there to witness those things. Are you suggesting that they took the time and money to fake behind the scenes footage? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/73 "2019-06-11T16:53:38Z")
Behind the scenes is where the _real_ lies are! Chill, TriPolar. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/74 "2019-06-11T16:55:45Z")
Iā€™m taking the unwise route of approaching this seriously. If it happened right now, probably Cruise ā€“ unless Bieber has been training MMA (or BJJ or something comparable) under the collective radar. So far, nothing has come out to suggest this. If they get six months to prepare, more likely Bieber. At his age, Cruise is more likely to suffer training injuries ā€“ and take longer to recover from them. As the younger, more limber man, Bieber would ramp up his fight game much more quickly. Cruise may also figure that he already knows how to kick ass and be a little less receptive to training. This is assuming that they both take this pretty seriously. The more they take it as a lark (like a quickie Celebrity Boxing thing), the more the odds favor Cruise. The hypothetical implies that they take it pretty seriously, though, so I would pick Bieber, especially under MMA rules. Did either Bieber or Cruise wrestle in high school / Jaycees? ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/75 "2019-06-11T16:59:32Z")
> [@StusBlues](#): > > Iā€™m taking the unwise route of approaching this seriously. > > If it happened right now, probably Cruise ā€“ unless Bieber has been training MMA (or BJJ or something comparable) under the collective radar. So far, nothing has come out to suggest this. > > If they get six months to prepare, more likely Bieber. At his age, Cruise is more likely to suffer training injuries ā€“ and take longer to recover from them. As the younger, more limber man, Bieber would ramp up his fight game much more quickly. Cruise may also figure that he already knows how to kick ass and be a little less receptive to training. > > This is assuming that they both take this pretty seriously. The more they take it as a lark (like a quickie Celebrity Boxing thing), the more the odds favor Cruise. The hypothetical implies that they take it pretty seriously, though, so I would pick Bieber, especially under MMA rules. > > Did either Bieber or Cruise wrestle in high school / Jaycees? Cruise wrestled in high school. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/76 "2019-06-11T17:02:14Z")
> [@Deser2](#): > > While I am not a fan of either of them and hope it ends up a double-TKO, Bieber does box (not professional) and is trained by Mayweather so Iā€™d say that def gives him an advantage there. > > Heā€™s also taller and younger with a longer reach. Another two checks in his column. And while Tom does his own stunts Bieber has done world tours where heā€™s dancing and singing on stage. There is an insane amount of stamina involved in that which is arguably one of the most important things for a boxer to have. > > I gotta go with Bieber (reluctantly). Bieber and Mayweather [had a nasty falling out a couple of years ago](https://bleacherreport.com/articles/2728609-floyd-mayweather-reportedly-calls-justin-bieber-a-traitor-after-instagram-snub). Then again, they were close enough to have a falling out, so thereā€™s that. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/77 "2019-06-11T17:07:15Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > Cruise wrestled in high school. Interesting. Bieber seems to be more of a striker with the Mayweather connection and all. All things being equal, I usually go with the grappler in these things, unless the striker has a demonstrated ability to stuff takedowns. Like I said, Iā€™ll take Bieber if they train for six months, mostly because that type of training is more likely to aggravate injuries for a man Cruiseā€™s age. If Cruise was actually a decent wrestler, thoughā€¦that changes things. ---
**Author:** ![ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chockfullofheadygoodness/32/511_2.png) [@ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/78 "2019-06-11T17:07:45Z")
Although Cruise has kept himself in good shape, at 56 he could be Losinā€™ It and a serious fight may be Risky Business; he could be the one who Taps out first. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/79 "2019-06-11T17:29:17Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > Chill, TriPolar. I gave Cruise a little credit for wrestling in high school. Thatā€™s as far as Iā€™ll go. I suppose if Bieber had been annoying me as long as Cruise has Iā€™d sound different. ---
**Author:** ![Dale\_Sams](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/779978/32.png) [@Dale\_Sams](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dale_Sams)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2019, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297/80 "2019-06-11T17:38:28Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Sorry, I didnā€™t realize you were there to witness those things. Are you down to Creationist arguments already? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gauntlet-has-been-thrown-justin-bieber-vs-tom-cruise-in-the-octogon-who-wins/835297.md?page=5)