# The "gay lisp" **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [April 22, 2003, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311 "2003-04-22T13:52:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Iteki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/eada6e/32.png) [@Iteki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iteki)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2003, 11:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/21 "2003-04-23T11:12:34Z")
mcbiggins, I have only encountered one gay guy that lisped, and that was due to a speech impediment. I have encountered (lots of) irish, english and scandinavian gay guys, and (some each) of american, african, indian, eastern-european/russian, western european. Never heard anyone with an overly sibilant speech pattern, but as I say, there are none the less _other_ “faggy-accents” within each community. ---
**Author:** ![Fugazi79](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ccd318/32.png) [@Fugazi79](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fugazi79)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2003, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/22 "2003-04-23T18:33:03Z")
Im gay myself, and many of “the crew” has that lisp. Dont know where it came from and why some seem to be “immune” to it (such as myself) But I can tell you one thing it became less obvious to me as I’ve been out longer. 5 years ago after meeting someone… say a bit festive, I would think immediatly, wow, what a lisp, now it doesnt jump out so much. ---
**Author:** ![drhess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/94ad74/32.png) [@drhess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drhess)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2003, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/23 "2003-04-23T19:37:07Z")
Isn’t it possible that str8 men would be more likely to have effeminate manners, lisps, etc. if hetero society didn’t “ban” it? Perhaps some gay men, those who don’t care and other factors, are more likely to drop the concern (conscious or not) for acting straight? To answer the original posting: you could only really know this by tracking lisping kids into adulthood. Even then, when is a guy gay? Would many not-yet-gay men ruin the study by checking straight? : ) Not entirely related, but I read that most men who have anorexia, few do, are gay. Bio, or socio? ---
**Author:** ![WeRSauron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f19dbf/32.png) [@WeRSauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WeRSauron)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2003, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/24 "2003-04-23T20:47:31Z")
I think accents, mannerisms, etc., all have to do with environment. Part of it, of course, is biological. My voice is feminine. I talk on the phones a lot at work, which is always interesting. Many people automatically assume I’m a woman. And I and my coworkers have decided that there is no polite way for me to inform the customer that I am a guy. My accent, I have noticed, changes depending on who I’m with and where I am. With family and other South Asians, I speak with a South Asian accent. With Americans, I have an American accent. With Europeans, I have a European accent. I also pick up speaking habits from good friends and acquaintances. My brief sojourn in the gay community informs me that some people pattern their behavior to blend in the gay community - some do it only when around other gay people and others are “on fire” all the time. But this is normal - one reason I speak with a South Asian accent is to blend in the South Asian community. Humans are, after all, very social animals. WRS ---
**Author:** ![Susanann](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ab992/32.png) [@Susanann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Susanann)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/25 "2003-04-24T00:04:33Z")
None of the gay men I ever knew had a lisp - they were all the macho/sports/masculine/military types like Rock Hudson/Montgormery Cliff. None of the lesbian women I have known have ever had a lisp. The only ones I ever saw with a lisp, are the fictional make believe ones on tv. ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/26 "2003-04-24T01:55:58Z")
I’m surprised no one has mentioned David Sedaris’s great collection of essays titled _Me Talk Pretty One Day_, in which he talks about how, as a boy in school, he was sent to a speech therapy class, which he calls “Future Fags of America” (or something like that). (FTR, Sedaris is gay.) I’m straight, but I’ve had many people tell me they thought I was gay upon meeting me. No one has been able to tell me exactly what it is that makes them think that, but my speech is definitely a factor, though I definitely don’t lisp (at least in the “clathic thenthe”). I also don’t like sports. ---
**Author:** ![Iteki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/eada6e/32.png) [@Iteki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iteki)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2003, 9:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/27 "2003-04-24T09:43:17Z")
Could it be how you spell your surname? 😃 :d&r: ---
**Author:** ![Early\_Out](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Early\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Early_Out)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/28 "2003-04-25T05:00:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by drhess \* > \*\*To answer the original posting: you could only really know this by tracking lisping kids into adulthood. \*\* To repeat myself, no, this won’t tell you anything at all. The childhood “lithp” and the gay “lissssp” aren’t the same thing. Other than the fact that both involve nonstandard pronunciations of the “s” sound, they have nothing to do with each other. ---
**Author:** ![TGWATY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b5e925/32.png) [@TGWATY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TGWATY)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/29 "2003-04-25T05:46:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by slipster \* > \*\*There is some discussion of this in Henry Bellamann’s novel **King’s Row, \*\* it is said that it is typical for gay men to pursue young adoscent men whose sexual identities have not yet “matured”.** I don’t remember this at all. **slipster** , could you provide the chapter? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/30 "2003-04-25T06:43:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TGWATY \* > Since homosexuality in females and males may not have the same biological cause, we wouldn’t expect the same correlation in men and women. ergo, no “lisp” in homosexual women. Well, with the women, their accents are obscured by their constant use of power tools. Just kidding. ---
**Author:** ![drhess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/94ad74/32.png) [@drhess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drhess)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/31 "2003-04-25T19:10:31Z")
Early Out, where did you get this idea that the gay lisp is sibiliant only? I think the lisp people are imitating is the “classic” one. See the various jokes above and in the link to Cecil’s answer. ---
**Author:** ![TeleTronOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4af34b/32.png) [@TeleTronOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeleTronOne)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/32 "2003-04-25T20:17:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Alan Smithee \* > \*\* > I’m straight, but I’ve had many people tell me they thought I was gay upon meeting me. No one has been able to tell me exactly what it is that makes them think that, but my speech is definitely a factor, though I definitely don’t lisp (at least in the “clathic thenthe”). I also don’t like sports. \*\* I thought I was the only one. I also have this habit of putting my hand on my hip when I talk. Some of the uhh… slower people I’ve known over the years have noted this by making such sophisticated quips as “huhuhuh… dude, you look totally gay, huhuhuh”. Shoulda seen the looks on their faces when I mentioned I didn’t like football. Anyway, I’m going to chime in and vote for the lisp to be an acquired thing. Of the gay guys I’ve known over the years, only one has had a noticeable lisp, and he was the only one who grew up around a supportive base of other gay individuals, which, I imagine, is where he picked it up. ---
**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/33 "2003-04-25T20:44:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Biffy the Elephant Shrew \* > \*\*I can’t think of a single gay person I’ve ever known, even ones who acted camp, who lisped. \*\* I’ve known a couple gay men who did lisp. Especially my friend Michael (of the Bancroft Lounge, if you’re out there). He lisped, limp-wristed, tsk’d and would lay the tips of his fingertips gently on your arm when he talked to you. He’s the one person who came closest to tempting me to “try it”, but I just wasn’t interested. My loss, probably. Peace, mangeorge ---
**Author:** ![Qazzz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/aeb1de/32.png) [@Qazzz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qazzz)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/34 "2003-04-25T21:00:43Z")
Hmmmm maybe I shouldn’t have titled this thread the “gay lisp.” Because it’s not always a lisp. But I mean, some guys when they speak just “sound gay,” and usually they are. But what makes a person sound gay? Being gay? Or is it environmentally produced? A lot of people who have responded seem to think that it’s something that’s adopted, but I can’t be so sure, considering that kids often grow up with it (like David Sedaris, I have several friends who were sent to speech classes as children, BEFORE they ever came out of the closet or frequented gay bars). Maybe my gaydar is just too finely tuned or something. I’m sure other gay people can attest to the fact that little physical indicators take on a lot of meaning when it comes to gaydar: stiffness of the shoulders, the rapidity that someone looks to the ground upon being met with a glance, hands in the pockets, etc, etc, etc. I don’t know… ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/35 "2003-04-25T21:52:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Iteki \* > \*\*Could it be how you spell your surname? 😃 > > :d&r: \*\* 😕 > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TeleTronOne \* > \*\*I thought I was the only one. I also have this habit of putting my hand on my hip when I talk. Some of the uhh… slower people I’ve known over the years have noted this by making such sophisticated quips as “huhuhuh… dude, you look totally gay, huhuhuh”. Shoulda seen the looks on their faces when I mentioned I didn’t like football. > \*\* Hmmm. Maybe we should form a support group. On second thought, a bunch of gay-acting men getting together to talk about our feelings . . . it might not help our case! > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Qazzz_ > \*\*I’m sure other gay people can attest to the fact that little physical indicators take on a lot of meaning when it comes to gaydar: stiffness of the shoulders, the rapidity that someone looks to the ground upon being met with a glance, hands in the pockets, etc, etc, etc. > \*\* Stiffness of shoulders? Hands in the pockets? 😕 I don’t **think** I do these things, but I never thought to check. I had no idea they were “gay” things to do. ---
**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/36 "2003-04-25T22:28:53Z")
What I want to know is, why is it impossible for a gay man to whistle? ---
**Author:** ![drhess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/94ad74/32.png) [@drhess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drhess)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/37 "2003-04-25T23:54:20Z")
huh? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2003, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/38 "2003-04-26T00:11:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by drhess \* > \*\*huh? \*\* It’s an old myth that gay men can’t whistle, given some extra weight by being cited in the Ian Fleming novel _The Man With the Golden Gun_. ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2003, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/39 "2003-04-26T02:02:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mangeorge \* > \*\*What I want to know is, why is it impossible for a gay man to whistle? \*\* Sure, they can blow. ## Peace. Both Liberace and Rock Hudson whistled. ---
**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2003, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311/40 "2003-04-26T03:02:53Z")
Okay. So _only_ gay men can whistle. BTW; How many of you guys whistled when they first read the “can’t whistle” post, just to be sure? That was the point of James Bond’s line in the above mentioned novel. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-gay-lisp/170311.md?page=3)