# The GIANT JESUS
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [November 29, 2004, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203 "2004-11-29T20:14:49Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Pullet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pullet)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/21 "2004-11-30T02:01:41Z")
> [@Cisco](#):
>
> Aren’t xtians supposed to, like, not worship statues and such?
To nitpick: they don’t, not even Roman Catholics despite the accusations of others, and these particular morons probably aren’t actually worshiping this giant piece of cheese. However, some x-tians are stupid enough to believe that a game of “I’ve got the biggest statue” will impress the three-person judging panel and win them the grand prize giant lie of a cheeseball. Very similar to the “I’ve made the most pilgramages” or the “I’ve donated the most money” games. This is why I left.
Sorry for the hyjack if you were joking.
Chicken kisses.
---
### Author:  [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/22 "2004-11-30T02:11:54Z")
[Check out the choir photos.](http://www.firechoir.com/fcphotos.html) Especially the [close ups.](http://www.firechoir.com/fullimages/Karen%2BWilson_f.jpg) Every one of them seems to have this “deer in headlights/I’m stoned on some really good reefer right now,” expression on their faces. I know it’s harsh of me, but I can’t help but read [this gal’s bio](http://www.firechoir.com/bios8.html#angie) and laugh hysterically for some reason.
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### Author:  [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/23 "2004-11-30T02:21:44Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#):
>
> Oh yeah, anybody else notice that [dude’s wife](http://www.darlenebishop.org/bio.html) missed her calling as a 60s album cover model?
Hey, don’t knock Darlene - she’s tight with [Rob Parsley](http://www.darlenebishop.org/gallery.html), whoever that is.
---
### Author:  [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/24 "2004-11-30T02:36:17Z")
My own personal giant Jesus is [the one](http://www.eurekaspringsarkansas.com/photos/statue.jpg) in Eureka Springs, Arkansas; from the front it’s blocky, but from the rear it looks _exactly_ like a milk carton.
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### Author:  [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/25 "2004-11-30T02:47:52Z")
> [@Manduck](#):
>
> Hey, don’t knock Darlene - she’s tight with [Rob Parsley](http://www.darlenebishop.org/gallery.html), whoever that is.
Apparently, he’s the scammer – preacher-- who runs [Break Through Ministries.](http://www.breakthrough.net/) I’m assuming that [the jailbait on the left](http://www.darlenebishop.org/laci_and_ashton.jpg) is his daughter, to which I can only say [one thing\*.](http://www.hosstyle.com/Goofy%20shit/Goofyshit31/images/IdHitIt.jpg)
\*Were it actually legal for me to do so, and we weren’t doing it “for Gawd,” but just because it was sweaty, nasty, and oh so much fun.
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### Author:  [@Etherman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Etherman)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/26 "2004-11-30T04:05:11Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#):
>
> the jailbait on the left is his daughter, to which I can only say [one thing\*.](http://www.hosstyle.com/Goofy%20shit/Goofyshit31/images/IdHitIt.jpg)
It makes it so much more amusing to me that when I clicked that link, I got a “too many users connected” error from the site.
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### Author:  [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/27 "2004-11-30T04:10:52Z")
> [@Etherman](#):
>
> It makes it so much more amusing to me that when I clicked that link, I got a “too many users connected” error from the site.
Hit “reload” and it should load. It’s hosted on a crappy ISP.
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### Author:  [@Khampelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khampelf)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/28 "2004-11-30T04:41:40Z")
In the Tradition of Bishop Usher, perhaps, The Stats don’t add up. A Six story, 42 foot high jesus has only 7 ft. per Jesus/Story.
I can only conclude this Congregation thinks Jesus was a Hobbit.
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### Author:  [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/29 "2004-11-30T06:39:31Z")
Kinda looks like a cross between Jesus and the [“Cardiff Giant.”](http://www.museumofhoaxes.com/cardiff.html) Only without the class and elegance of P.T. Barnum added to the mix.
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### Author:  [@E.Thorp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E.Thorp)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 7:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/30 "2004-11-30T07:02:41Z")
When I was growing up (in Ohio, a fairly Jesus-friendly place), there was no giant Jesus statue per se in my town, but there was a little Jesus statue with a light casting a giant Jesus-shadow on the church’s otherwise blank, bleak façade. Some teenagers (under interrogation, I will deny everything) used to enjoy sneaking up behind the statue and moving its arm, making the Jesus-shadow wave at passing cars.
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### Author:  [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/31 "2004-11-30T07:11:52Z")
**E. Thorp** , I just may have ruined my keyboard with a spit-take after reading your post…
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### Author:  [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/32 "2004-11-30T09:32:56Z")
> [@Eve](#):
>
> [This](http://www.corrosionsource.com/technicallibrary/corrdoctors/Modules/Landmarks/christ-location.htm) is the Giant Jesus that really creeps me out–it’s 2330 feet tall and ready to take a swan dive into the Rio harbor!
I can’t wrap my mind around that thing being 2330 feet tall. I mean, am I having a TOTAL brain fart here or weren’t the WTC Towers considerably less than that (1500-something?) and isn’t the Statue of Liberty less than a tenth of that (180ish feet?)?
---
### Author:  [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/33 "2004-11-30T12:56:07Z")
Y’know what this Super Jesus needs?
A frommage shop across from it: **Cheeses of Nazereth**
You knew that one was coming.
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### Author:  [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/34 "2004-11-30T12:58:15Z")
Is it just me or does the Messiah look like he is sinking in quicksand?
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### Author:  [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/35 "2004-11-30T13:13:02Z")
> [@Cisco](#):
>
> I can’t wrap my mind around that thing being 2330 feet tall. I mean, am I having a TOTAL brain fart here or weren’t the WTC Towers considerably less than that (1500-something?) and isn’t the Statue of Liberty less than a tenth of that (180ish feet?)?
It’s 2330 feet above sea level, being perched on a mountain. It’s actually “only” 38 metres tall, whatever that is in US units. 150 feet?
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### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/36 "2004-11-30T13:14:15Z")
I think Jesus got Andrew Lloyd Webber’s musicals mixed up. You’re suppose to be auditioning with a song from “Jesus Christ Superstar,” not “Don’t Cry for Me Argentina.” Or maybe he’s just tired of being typecasted.
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### Author:  [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/37 "2004-11-30T14:50:46Z")
> [@jjimm](#):
>
> It’s 2330 feet above sea level, being perched on a mountain. It’s actually “only” 38 metres tall, whatever that is in US units. 150 feet?
_What?!_ The damn tourism site said it was 2330 feet tall! Good thing I didn’t go flying down to Rio (“by the sea-oh”), or I’d have been _really_ pissed off to find a teeny-tiny 150-foot Jesus.
“_Hey!_ Where the hell’s my 2330-foot Jesus, dammit?!”
---
### Author:  [@lovelyluka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lovelyluka)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/38 "2004-11-30T15:06:09Z")
> [@Eve](#):
>
> “_Hey!_ Where the hell’s my 2330-foot Jesus, dammit?!”
[hijack]
I feel for you. On a personal note, [Mile High Stadium](http://www.ballparks.com/baseball/national/milehi.htm) was particularly disappointing.
[/hijack]
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### Author:  [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/39 "2004-11-30T15:25:18Z")
> [@Eve](#):
>
> [This](http://www.corrosionsource.com/technicallibrary/corrdoctors/Modules/Landmarks/christ-location.htm) is the Giant Jesus that really creeps me out–it’s 2330 feet tall and ready to take a swan dive into the Rio harbor!
>
> Gives me the heebie-jeebies.
Evidently, size DOES matter!
---
### Author:  [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2004, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/40 "2004-11-30T15:28:55Z")
> [@Eve](#):
>
> _What?!_ The damn tourism site said it was 2330 feet tall! Good thing I didn’t go flying down to Rio (“by the sea-oh”), or I’d have been _really_ pissed off to find a teeny-tiny 150-foot Jesus.
>
> “_Hey!_ Where the hell’s my 2330-foot Jesus, dammit?!”
[hijack cont.] On a trip to Ireland, my then-boyfriend-now-husband made me trudge through 2K of muddy, cow paddy infested fields, climbing over barbed wire and tripping through the gorse on a rainy afternoon to look at a rock. A bloody rock. Apparently, it was a very historically significant rock that was supposed to be shaped like a cat or something. Looked like a stupid boulder to me. I am now commited to the idea of separate vacations. Far, far away from my academic historian of a husband, you’ll find me sipping a shockingly colored drink by the pool. [/hijack]
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