# The GIANT JESUS
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [November 29, 2004, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203 "2004-11-29T20:14:49Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 5
### Author:  [@iggy\_popov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iggy_popov)
#### Post date: [December 9, 2004, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/81 "2004-12-09T17:07:22Z")
A Jesus tap dancing Christ would be enertaining as well. Wouldn’t you think?
---
### Author:  [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)
#### Post date: [December 9, 2004, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/82 "2004-12-09T17:45:39Z")
> [@AskNott](#):
>
> Then there’s the **Touchdown Jesus**
Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goalposts of life?
---
### Author:  [@JoeSki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JoeSki)
#### Post date: [December 9, 2004, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/83 "2004-12-09T21:43:48Z")
> [@Shirley Ujest](#):
>
> Is it just me or does the Messiah look like he is sinking in quicksand?
I like to think he’s bursting throughthe ground like some kind of holy rolling Kool Aid Man. One wonders what his following catch phrase would be…
---
### Author:  [@JoeSki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JoeSki)
#### Post date: [December 9, 2004, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/84 "2004-12-09T21:49:06Z")
I for one welcome our new giant zombie Jesus overlords.
Admit it. You’re all jealous I beat you to the punch.
---
### Author:  [@northcountry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/northcountry)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2004, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/85 "2004-12-10T04:03:08Z")
> [@Kalhoun](#):
>
> Did anyone see the statue of the giant Jesus at a church in (Ohio, maybe?)? It stood six stories tall and was just the upper torso, arms and head. Kinda scary. In a King Kong Meets Mothra kind of way. I saw this briefly on MSNBC this morning and haven’t been able to find anything else on it all day. Anyone? Anyone?
Makes perfect sense - oversized parishoner comes out of oversized big box retailer after realizing BIG savings by going there, goes to oversized church to get saved (more savings) by a 60 ft Jesus statue.
He’d be rolling over in his grave - if he were still in it…
---
### Author:  [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2004, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/86 "2004-12-10T04:54:48Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#):
>
> And a giant Christ on a Cracker Statue, and a Jesus Christ in a Chicken Basket Statue, and a Christ on a Pogo Stick Statue and. . . .
And John the Baptist on a Harley to go with them.
---
### Author:  [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2004, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/87 "2004-12-10T06:02:16Z")
Christ **on** a cracker? They always told me Christ **is** the cracker! :dubious:
---
### Author:  [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2004, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/88 "2004-12-10T14:23:56Z")
> [@Harimad-sol](#):
>
> > [@Tuckerfan](#):
> >
> > And a giant Christ on a Cracker Statue, and a Jesus Christ in a Chicken Basket Statue, and a Christ on a Pogo Stick Statue and. . . .
>
> And John the Baptist on a Harley to go with them.
So, who’s good with Photoshop?
---
### Author:  [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)
#### Post date: [December 10, 2004, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/89 "2004-12-10T20:22:45Z")
> [@Eve](#):
>
> [This](http://www.corrosionsource.com/technicallibrary/corrdoctors/Modules/Landmarks/christ-location.htm) is the Giant Jesus that really creeps me out–it’s 2330 feet tall and ready to take a swan dive into the Rio harbor!
>
> Gives me the heebie-jeebies.
Yeah, but that Jesus doesn’t look like he just crawled out of a vat of acid.
The Ohio Giant Jesus looks like Darth Jesus.
“Join me…Peter. It is your destiny!”
“The Faith in you is strong, young of Tarsus…but you are not a Disciple yet.”
“No, God, I am your father!”
(Hey, Darth Jesus would be a GREAT user name!)
---
### Author:  [@ktallarigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ktallarigo)
#### Post date: [September 15, 2005, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/90 "2005-09-15T05:26:43Z")
> [@asterion](#):
>
> Think anyone goes out there with a football and tries to kick it through?
Great idea! This monstrous piece of cream cheese is halfway between my college and my hometown, next time I’m driving home I’ll send one through the uprights.
---
### Author:  [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)
#### Post date: [September 15, 2005, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/91 "2005-09-15T06:09:11Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#):
>
> [Check out the choir photos.](http://www.firechoir.com/fcphotos.html) Especially the [close ups.](http://www.firechoir.com/fullimages/Karen%2BWilson_f.jpg) Every one of them seems to have this “deer in headlights/I’m stoned on some really good reefer right now,” expression on their faces. I know it’s harsh of me, but I can’t help but read [this gal’s bio](http://www.firechoir.com/bios8.html#angie) and laugh hysterically for some reason.
I think it’s this line that really does it for me: “I cannot describe the huge impact that Solid Rock has made on both myself and my family.” She’s not stoned, she’s concussed!
[sub]Hey, I’m responding to a year old post! Eh, fuck it.[/sub]
---
### Author:  [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)
#### Post date: [September 15, 2005, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/92 "2005-09-15T07:41:07Z")
Sweet zombie Jesus!
---
### Author:  [@Hung\_Mung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hung_Mung)
#### Post date: [September 15, 2005, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/93 "2005-09-15T07:44:23Z")
> [@Larry Mudd](#):
>
> Remember: King Kong died for your sins.
Also, Mr. Mamamoto can swallow his nose.
---
### Author:  [@Eleusis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eleusis)
#### Post date: [September 15, 2005, 7:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/94 "2005-09-15T07:48:49Z")
> [@Larry Mudd](#):
>
> Sweet zombie Jesus!
Not to mention that _everybody_ knows Jesus is exactly nine hundred feet tall.
I tripped it myself, firsthand.
---
### Author:  [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)
#### Post date: [September 15, 2005, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/95 "2005-09-15T08:15:25Z")
> [@MEBuckner](#):
>
> That cross is totally not to scale. There’s not way you could fit the Giant Jesus on there (or even the Giant Half of a Jesus). It’s like they must have crucified the Baby Jesus instead.
See that’s why you need to read the Bible; God can do anything he wants.
---
### Author:  [@Eleusis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eleusis)
#### Post date: [September 15, 2005, 8:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/96 "2005-09-15T08:34:03Z")
> [@Mangetout](#):
>
> God can do anything he wants.
[Who???](http://www.venganza.org/)
---
### Author:  [@Eleusis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eleusis)
#### Post date: [September 15, 2005, 8:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/97 "2005-09-15T08:35:30Z")
> [@Eleusis](#):
>
> [Who???](http://www.venganza.org/)
[my bad](http://www.venganza.org/images/wallpapers/noodledoodle1600_1200.jpg)
---
### Author:  [@PigBoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PigBoy)
#### Post date: [September 15, 2005, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/98 "2005-09-15T13:52:37Z")
The field goal reference reminds me of a few pictures I made to show the white chocolate messiah in his travels around more of the Cincinnati area.
First, of course, is his presence in the [Bengals’ football stadium](http://www.pbase.com/piggiston/image/41235026.jpg).
On warm days, Jesus enjoys [recreational boating on the Ohio River](http://www.pbase.com/piggiston/image/41235025.jpg).
And finally, the centerpiece of downtown Cincinnati, [Fountain Square (renamed Jesus Square)](http://www.pbase.com/piggiston/image/41235024.jpg).
---
### Author:  [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)
#### Post date: [September 15, 2005, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/99 "2005-09-15T13:58:37Z")
> [@Eleusis](#):
>
> [Who???](http://www.venganza.org/)
Great site. But aren’t they worried about offending … you know … Cthulhuists?
---
### Author:  [@Mehitabel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mehitabel)
#### Post date: [September 15, 2005, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203/100 "2005-09-15T17:03:08Z")
Is it really that color?? Won’t it melt?
[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203.md?page=4)
[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-giant-jesus/277203.md?page=6)