# The Going Rate For a One Legged Hooker **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 14, 2008, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397 "2008-03-14T20:28:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/1 "2008-03-14T20:28:44Z")
I was surprised to read that the going rate for a hooker with nice teeth in New York was around $1000/hour. I was curious what the rate would be for those men I once read about in Penthouse who preferred one legged hookers. Well it turns out I didn’t have too wait long for my answer. Heather Mills will now recieve 25,000,000 pounds for 35,015 days of marriage, presumably for Paul to dally with her. That comes to $1442/hour. She couldn’t PAY me that much to fuck her. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/2 "2008-03-14T20:31:24Z")
For 25 million pounds I think I’d fuck anyone. ---
**Author:** ![Gukumatz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/74df32/32.png) [@Gukumatz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gukumatz)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/3 "2008-03-14T20:34:55Z")
[QUOTE=Antinor01] For 25 million pounds I think I’d fuck anyone. [/QUOTE] Hell, for that much money, I’d fuck _everyone_. ---
**Author:** ![LilShieste](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9f8e36/32.png) [@LilShieste](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LilShieste)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/4 "2008-03-14T20:35:43Z")
So… all wives are hookers? ---
**Author:** ![Jonno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f19dbf/32.png) [@Jonno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonno)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/5 "2008-03-14T20:36:22Z")
[QUOTE=The Flying Dutchman] Heather Mills will now recieve 25,000,000 pounds for 35,015 days of marriage, presumably for Paul to dally with her. [/QUOTE] I had no idea they had been married since 1912. Wow! ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/6 "2008-03-14T20:38:59Z")
Every time a woman figures prominently in the public eye several posters always come out and proclaim loudly that they could never, ever, ever have sex with that woman. I find that extremely funny. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/7 "2008-03-14T20:39:11Z")
[QUOTE=CelticCowboy] I had no idea they had been married since 1912. Wow! [/QUOTE] Sorry, read hours instead of days. ---
**Author:** ![NightRabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbce88/32.png) [@NightRabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NightRabbit)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/8 "2008-03-14T20:41:38Z")
[QUOTE=LilShieste] So… all wives are hookers? [/QUOTE] If they demand 25 million pounds for having married you… yes. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@The\_Flying\_Dutchman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Flying_Dutchman)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/9 "2008-03-14T20:42:49Z")
[QUOTE=LilShieste] So… all wives are hookers? [/QUOTE] No. Some are cooks, some are maids, some are nannys. ---
**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/10 "2008-03-14T20:44:27Z")
Hell, I’d sleep with McCartney for $25 million. Then I’d find out how many diamonds Kristen is worth now. ---
**Author:** ![LilShieste](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9f8e36/32.png) [@LilShieste](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LilShieste)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/11 "2008-03-14T20:56:44Z")
Calling her a hooker because of this is ridiculous, though. What if she only receives $100? Does that just make her a really cheap hooker? What about any other divorce settlement, in which the woman (or even the man) receives some determined portion of the matrimonial assets? Damn. Prostitution is a bigger problem than I thought. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/12 "2008-03-14T21:01:14Z")
[QUOTE=LilShieste] So… all wives are hookers? [/QUOTE] ANA. Don Juan: a word against chastity is an insult to me. 427 DON JUAN. I say nothing against your chastity, Señora, since it took the form of a husband and twelve children. What more could you have done had you been the most abandoned of women? 428 ANA. I could have had twelve husbands and no children: thats what I could have done, Juan. And let me tell you that that would have made all the difference to the earth which I replenished. 429 THE STATUE. Bravo Ana! Juan: you are floored, quelled, annihilated. 430 DON JUAN. No: for though that difference is the true essential difference—Doña Ana has, I admit, gone straight to the real point—yet it is not a difference of love or chastity, or even constancy; for twelve children by twelve different husbands would have replenished the earth perhaps more effectively. Suppose my friend Ottavio had died when you were thirty, you would never have remained a widow: you were too beautiful. Suppose the successor of Ottavio had died when you were forty, you would still have been irresistible; and a woman who marries twice marries three times if she becomes free to do so. Twelve lawful children borne by one highly respectable lady to three different fathers is not impossible nor condemned by public opinion. That such a lady may be more law abiding than the poor girl whom we used to spurn into the gutter for bearing one unlawful infant is no doubt true; but dare you say she is less self-indulgent? 431 ANA. She is more virtuous: that is enough for me. 432 DON JUAN. In that case, what is virtue but the Trade Unionism of the married? – [_Man and Superman,_](http://www.bartleby.com/157/) by George Bernard Shaw ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/13 "2008-03-14T21:17:35Z")
DON JUAN: Lady, I love my cigar, but I take it outta my mouth once in a while! ---
**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2008, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/14 "2008-03-14T21:24:35Z")
[QUOTE=Bryan Ekers] DON JUAN: Lady, I love my cigar, but I take it outta my mouth once in a while! [/QUOTE] I thought that was Groucho Marx, or am I being wooshed? ---
**Author:** ![chique](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4491bb/32.png) [@chique](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chique)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2008, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/15 "2008-03-15T03:37:31Z")
Fucking brilliant OP, man. Started off as another ho-hum Spitzer bitch but at the end I actually LOLed. Guffawed, even! Great job, Dikeman. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2008, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/16 "2008-03-15T03:55:44Z")
[QUOTE=chique] Fucking brilliant OP, man. Started off as another ho-hum Spitzer bitch but at the end I actually LOLed. Guffawed, even! Great job, Dikeman. 🙂 [/QUOTE] Heh, I’d fuck Heather Mills if she just took me out to a nice restaurant and bought me flowers. 😉 She’s a good looking woman. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2008, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/17 "2008-03-15T16:28:30Z")
[QUOTE=LilShieste] Calling her a hooker because of this is ridiculous, though. . [/QUOTE] True, lass. She’s not a hooker, by Billy Bones. She’s a peg-legged Pirate, AARRRR! And poor Paul is a silly old man, who thought he could recapture the days when he was the sexual fantasy of millions of teenyboppers. She took advantage, & all the booty she could plunder. Ar. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2008, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/18 "2008-03-15T16:35:53Z")
In Cambodia, I think it may be five bucks a pop. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2008, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/19 "2008-03-15T16:51:56Z")
25% off ---
**Author:** ![Lazlo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lazlo/32/9678_2.png) [@Lazlo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lazlo)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2008, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397/20 "2008-03-15T18:06:25Z")
[QUOTE=runner pat] 25% off [/QUOTE] Bastard! I can’t stop laughing! 😃 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-going-rate-for-a-one-legged-hooker/441397.md?page=2)