# The greatest lines in film history? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 9, 2003, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098 "2003-03-09T16:38:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![vl\_mungo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc8723/32.png) [@vl\_mungo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vl_mungo)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2003, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/41 "2003-03-09T21:45:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by notcynical \* > \*\*“Do you not know that King Kong the first was just three foot six inches tall? He only came up to Faye Wray’s belly button. If God could do the things that we can do he’d be a happy man.” - _The Stunt Man_ \*\* Great quote from a great movie! Here’s some of my favorites (also I’m pretty partial to my sig): Navin R. Johnson in The Jerk: The new phone book’s here! The new phone book’s here! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity I need! My name in print! That really makes somebody! Things are going to start happening to me now. Johnny in Johnny Guitar: There’s only two things in this world that a ‘real man’ needs: a cup of coffee and a good smoke. \_ Pee Wee Herman in Pee-wee’s Big Adventure: There’s things about me you don’t know, Dottie. Things you wouldn’t understand. Things you couldn’t understand. Things you shouldn’t understand. \_ Johnny Hooker in The Sting: Luther said I could learn some things from you. I already know how to drink. Captain Benjamin L. Willard in Apocalypse Now: Never get out of the boat. Absolutely god damn right. Unless you were goin’ all the way. Kurtz got off the boat. He split from the whole fuckin’ program. Larson E. Whipsnade in You Can’t Cheat an Honest Man (1939) said As my dear old grandfather Litvak said (just before they swung the trap), he said “You can’t cheat an honest man. Never give a sucker an even break or smarten up a chump.” ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2003, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/42 "2003-03-09T21:59:34Z")
Shodan, the Gandi quote can be life-changing. It is absolutely one of my favorites. The same is true for jesseboy’s quote from _Lawrence of Arabia_ – “Nothing is written!” Do you remember the final words on the subject? You have to have seen _Love Story_ to appreciate these lines from _What’s Up Doc_: Barbra Streisand: “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.” Ryan O’Neil: “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard!” ---
**Author:** ![SojournerSamson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/67e7ee/32.png) [@SojournerSamson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SojournerSamson)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2003, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/43 "2003-03-09T21:59:43Z")
“Made it, Ma,…Top of the world!” Cody Jarrett in White Heat ---
**Author:** ![Roadwalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e19b73/32.png) [@Roadwalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roadwalker)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2003, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/44 "2003-03-09T22:35:25Z")
You’ll find a slight squeeze on the hooter an excellent safety precaution, Miss Scrumptious. ---
**Author:** ![scablet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/53a042/32.png) [@scablet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scablet)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2003, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/45 "2003-03-09T23:07:45Z")
“How do you shoot the devil in the back? What if you miss?” “Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?” “I am in a world of shit.” “You know, there are two things I don’t like about you, Felicia: your face. So how about shutting both of them?” ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2003, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/46 "2003-03-09T23:08:53Z")
Hmmn… No lines from Casablanca? It has to have more memorable quotes than any other movie! These aren’t exactly correct, because I’m going off memory, but these lines are quite famous: “Louis, this looks like the start of a beautiful friendship.” “Play it once, Sam. For old times’ sake.” “Here’s looking at you, kid.” “Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.” “Round up the usual suspects.” ---
**Author:** ![Manatee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/50afbb/32.png) [@Manatee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manatee)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2003, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/47 "2003-03-09T23:30:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TTT \* > \*\*OTHO, where is **Manatee** ’s one from? \*\* What, no one jumped on this? It’s **The African Queen**. ---
**Author:** ![II\_Gyan\_II](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/bbe5ce/32.png) [@II\_Gyan\_II](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/II_Gyan_II)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2003, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/48 "2003-03-09T23:51:20Z")
While not a favorite, what about Eastwood in Dirty Harry: _Go ahead punk, make my day_ ---
**Author:** ![Omorka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/50afbb/32.png) [@Omorka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omorka)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2003, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/49 "2003-03-09T23:56:18Z")
Ooh, someone mentioned _What’s Up Doc_ but didn’t include: “I can’t see!” “Of course you can’t see, we’re inside a Chinese dragon!” Of course, there’s always: “Total protonic reversal . . .” “Okay, that’s bad. Important safety tip. Thanks, Egon.” ---
**Author:** ![GrinnaGirla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e8c25b/32.png) [@GrinnaGirla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrinnaGirla)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2003, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/50 "2003-03-10T00:08:10Z")
“You can’t leave. All the plants will die.” Stripes “I’m not even supposed to be here today.” Clerks ---
**Author:** ![mozart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@mozart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mozart)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2003, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/51 "2003-03-10T00:45:41Z")
" there is no spoon"…The Matrix ---
**Author:** ![look\_ninjas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b2d939/32.png) [@look\_ninjas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/look_ninjas)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2003, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/52 "2003-03-10T00:52:12Z")
“If I was on fire, no one in this family would piss on me to put me out.” “Let’s strike a match and see.” from The Lion in Winter (possible slightly misquoted, but you get the drift.) ---
**Author:** ![RawkStah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/46a35a/32.png) [@RawkStah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RawkStah)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2003, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/53 "2003-03-10T01:20:19Z")
“I want my father back, you son of a bitch.” – Inigo Montoya in “The Princess Bride” Brian: Look, you don’t have to follow me! You’re all individuals! Multitude: Yes! We’re all individuals! Individual: I’m not! – from “The Life of Brian” ---
**Author:** ![Klaatu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Klaatu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Klaatu)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2003, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/54 "2003-03-10T01:45:57Z")
General Beringer (Barry Corbin) in _War Games_: “Goddammit, I’d piss on a spark plug if I thought it’d do any good!” ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2003, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/55 "2003-03-10T03:15:24Z")
“Go, get the butter.” **Last Tango in Paris** “He’s got a real purty mouth, ain’t he?” **Deliverance** “Hitler was better looking than Churchill, he was a better dresser than Churchill, he had more hair, he told funnier jokes, and he could dance the pants off of Churchill.” **The Producers** ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2003, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/56 "2003-03-10T05:41:44Z")
“Mein Fuehrer…I can walk!” ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Mook](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Mr.Mook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Mook)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2003, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/57 "2003-03-10T06:08:11Z")
“Charlie don’t surf” - A/N “It’s not personal Sonny, it’s business” - Godfather “Come to the tables and stuff yourselves!” - Errol Flynn in Robin Hood “What do we do now?” Redford in “The Candidate” And guess: “What is your name?” “Ke-” “Wonderful to meet you, Ke-!” ---
**Author:** ![teleute12](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@teleute12](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teleute12)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2003, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/58 "2003-03-10T06:30:14Z")
“I’m the king of the world!” – Titanic Okay, so maybe that’s more one for most-often quoted lines in film history? and from The Princess Bride: “My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.” “He’s only _mostly_ dead.” (paraphrase) ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2003, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/59 "2003-03-10T06:39:40Z")
(after getting an arm torn off) **You ruined my jacket!** (to henchmen) **Kill 'em a lot.** –Paul Reubens in _Buffy the Vampire Slayer_ ---
**Author:** ![RawkStah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/46a35a/32.png) [@RawkStah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RawkStah)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2003, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098/60 "2003-03-10T06:45:30Z")
“KAAAA-NEEEEH-DAAAA!” - “Akira” (OK, so it’s not all that great, but it’s memorable.) “Sometimes, the magic doesn’t work.” – “Little Big Man” “I’m goan git a coupl’a pipe-hittin’ niggas to go to work on his ass with a pair of pliers and a blowtorch. We goan git mideval on his ass.” – “Pulp Fiction” (Probably misquoted) “I was cured, all right.” – “A Clockwork Orange” “Hail to the king, baby.” – “Bruce Campbell vs. The Army of Darkness” Chas: “Is it dark?” Richie: “It’s a suicide note.” – “The Royal Tennenbaums” Boromir: “They have a cave troll.” – “The Lord of The Rings: The Fellowship of The Ring” “Stay on target!” – “Star Wars: A New Hope” “Mmm. Gum.” – “Cabin Boy” “Man, oh, man. I hate them Fancy Lads.” – “Cabin Boy” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-lines-in-film-history/160098.md?page=4)