# The greatest LIVING American hero. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 18, 2002, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504 "2002-12-18T06:40:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/81 "2002-12-18T20:51:05Z")
Was it Janet Reno? ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/82 "2002-12-18T20:59:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pkbites \* > \*\*But can you all image the pain in my chest when, for a while, I thought it was my son who wrote that about Madonna!😛 \*\* Oh, and why would that have been bad, _pray tell_? ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/83 "2002-12-18T21:03:06Z")
People, people, people, we have already had this discussion in numerous other threads. It has been scientifically proven that the greatest American to ever walk the Earth, a hero to billions on the planet today, is Richard Drew of the Minnesotta Mining and Manufacturing Corporation (3M). In the 1920’s Mr. Drew gave mankind a promethean gift. He invented duct tape. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/84 "2002-12-18T21:05:27Z")
Greta van Susteren? ---
**Author:** ![Legomancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/779978/32.png) [@Legomancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Legomancer)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/85 "2002-12-18T21:08:31Z")
This is going nowhere. allow me a rewrite. “So I look to see who the greatest living American hero was, and it was me! The paper I thought was written by that neighbor chick was actually written by my son, and he was talking about how much he admired and respected me. He told in moving detail about how I had saved him from a life of drug-driven crime, and how much he loved me. Tears welled in my eyes as I read the lines of keyboard-captured prose. Then my son walked in and asked what I was doing. He was a little angry at first, but when he saw my tears of joy, he ran over and hugged me. ‘I love you, Dad!’ he said.” Perfect! I’m thinking of Michael Keaton for the dad and maybe that Malcolm kid for the son! ---
**Author:** ![NYR407](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbe5ce/32.png) [@NYR407](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NYR407)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/86 "2002-12-18T21:11:27Z")
Lego, is it Speilberg the Director? ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/87 "2002-12-18T21:20:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Legomancer \* > \*\*This is going nowhere. allow me a rewrite. > > “So I look to see who the greatest living American hero was, and it was me! The paper I thought was written by that neighbor chick was actually written by my son, and he was talking about how much he admired and respected me. He told in moving detail about how I had saved him from a life of drug-driven crime, and how much he loved me. Tears welled in my eyes as I read the lines of keyboard-captured prose. Then my son walked in and asked what I was doing. He was a little angry at first, but when he saw my tears of joy, he ran over and hugged me. ‘I love you, Dad!’ he said.” \*\* _Coming soon to an inbox near you!_ ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/88 "2002-12-18T21:36:37Z")
Patty Duke? ---
**Author:** ![kabbes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e99b99/32.png) [@kabbes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kabbes)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/89 "2002-12-18T22:44:18Z")
Bah. I still prefer ra-ra-Rasputin. After all, he _is_ the lover of the Russian Queen. pan ---
**Author:** ![Cabbage](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@Cabbage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cabbage)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/90 "2002-12-18T23:03:31Z")
> [@](#): > > My guess for the Greatest American Hero is Ralph Hinkley. What! You mean that fucked up dude that shot President Reagan? I believe you meant Ralph _Hanley_. ---
**Author:** ![js\_africanus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@js\_africanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/js_africanus)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/91 "2002-12-18T23:12:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pkbites \* > \*\*Do kids even know what the term “Hero” means? What are they teaching in public schools? \*\* Maybe they’re teaching kids how to use a dictionary. > [@](#): > > Main Entry: he·ro > Pronunciation: 'hir-(")O, 'hE-(")rO > Function: noun > Inflected Form(s): plural heroes > Etymology: Latin heros, from Greek hErOs > Date: 14th century > 1 a : a mythological or legendary figure often of divine descent endowed with great strength or ability b : an illustrious warrior c : a man admired for his achievements and noble qualities d : one that shows great courage > 2 a : the principal male character in a literary or dramatic work b : the central figure in an event, period, or movement > 3 plural usually heros : SUBMARINE 2 > 4 : an object of extreme admiration and devotion : IDOL Let’s see, Madonna is a “legendary” pop-star with considerable skill–that’s 1.a. Madonna is admired for her musical achievements and her efforts to make sexuality less taboo–that’s 1.c. Some may say that she had to have courage to push back sexual boundries–that’s 1.d. She dominated the pop scene for a while, and some may say she did ground breaking work–that’s 2.b. People do have extreme admiration and devotion to her–that’s 4. Is she the _greatest_ American hero? I wouldn’t say so, but the question rests in the girl’s argument, not your indignation.:rolleyes: While you’ve certainly failed in proving her wrong, you _have_ proved that actually using a dictionary can teach you something. ---
**Author:** ![Strainger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strainger/32/244_2.png) [@Strainger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strainger)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/92 "2002-12-18T23:21:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cabbage \* > \*\*What! You mean that fucked up dude that shot President Reagan? I believe you meant Ralph _Hanley_. \*\* Actually that was [_John_ Hinckley](http://www.law.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/hinckley/HBIO.HTM). ---
**Author:** ![Trion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ccd318/32.png) [@Trion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trion)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/93 "2002-12-18T23:33:45Z")
Sorry **Strainger** , but I believe that you’re the one getting wooshed here. When John Hinckley shot at Regan, the creators of the show _The Greatest American Hero_ changed Ralph’s name from Hinckley to Hanley so as to avoid associating the hero with the assasin. **Cabbage** was refering to this name change. (At least I think so.) ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2002, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/94 "2002-12-18T23:42:54Z")
Don’t you know a hero is nothin but a sandwich? Who cares if she put Madonna? Maybe Madonna has affected her alot more than Buzz Aldrin or whoever you would’ve listed. And really, how many living “heroes” do we have anyway? The NYPD and the FDNY were heroes _that day_ but can you use that one word to describe everything that happened in their lives before and after 9/11? ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2002, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/95 "2002-12-19T00:00:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pkbites \* > \*\* > But can you all image the pain in my chest when, for a while, I thought it was my son who wrote that about Madonna! \*\* It wouldn’t be so bad if he was a fan of Aussie band [The Androids](http://www.theandroids.com) and their top 10 single “Do It With Madonna”. By the way, check out Doris Day’s history because she’s a remarkable woman. At 16 she was a promising dancer and planned a professional career. A car accident ended her plans so within 2 years, having never sung before, she became the best female jazz singer in the business. Turning to movies she was the leading female box office star for years. When she retired she found that her husband had embezzled all her money and she was in debt. So she reinvented herself as a TV star and made back her fortune so she could retire and work for animal rights. ---
**Author:** ![Cabbage](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@Cabbage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cabbage)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2002, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/96 "2002-12-19T00:25:14Z")
> [@](#): > > Actually that was John Hinckley. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Strainger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strainger/32/244_2.png) [@Strainger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strainger)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2002, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/97 "2002-12-19T00:54:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Trion \* > \*\*Sorry **Strainger** , but I believe that you’re the one getting wooshed here. When John Hinckley shot at Regan, the creators of the show _The Greatest American Hero_ changed Ralph’s name from Hinckley to Hanley so as to avoid associating the hero with the assasin. **Cabbage** was refering to this name change. (At least I think so.) \*\* Well [I’ll be damned](http://www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/3657/miscellaneous.html). Goddammit, I hate being whooshed. Does it help if I say that I was only 11-12 at the time and don’t remember the show that well? Wait, Donald Regan was shot?! Well, as long as it wasn’t Brian or Dennis. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2002, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/98 "2002-12-19T01:05:48Z")
Well now to be fair, Jesus only resurrected himself. He never came back as anything interesting, like a frog, or a goat, or an Evita poseur. Personally I think now that I would have chosen Patty Hearst. Partly because I think the whole story’s so fascinating, but mainly because I want to give **pkbites** apoplexy. ---
**Author:** ![BZ00000](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/47e85d/32.png) [@BZ00000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BZ00000)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2002, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/99 "2002-12-19T03:24:50Z")
> [@](#): > > After kicking the shit out of him Well, Madonna doesn’t beat her children. :rolleyes: So she has that going for her. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2002, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504/100 "2002-12-19T05:22:31Z")
When I first read the thread, I thought the choice was going to be really stupid. But it’s Madonna. I can see that. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-living-american-hero/143504.md?page=6)