# The greatest vulgar, obscene, blasphemous, profane, or otherwise NSFW quotations **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 12, 2008, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-vulgar-obscene-blasphemous-profane-or-otherwise-nsfw-quotations/463224 "2008-09-12T04:14:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2008, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-vulgar-obscene-blasphemous-profane-or-otherwise-nsfw-quotations/463224/61 "2008-09-18T17:28:57Z")
> [@Cisco](#): > > He was ex-PFC Wintergreen all throughout _Catch-22_ IIRC. > > I can’t believe no one has mentioned anything from South Park yet. I like: > > “You are a boner-biting dick-fart fuckface!” > > And of course: > If I remember later I’ll look through my set of _Preacher_ paperbacks. There are some doozies in there. Naw, he rose to ex-sargeant ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2008, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-vulgar-obscene-blasphemous-profane-or-otherwise-nsfw-quotations/463224/62 "2008-09-18T17:57:54Z")
Huh. They might swear less, but a good chunk of _Always Sunny_ is certainly more obscene than most of this thread. “DB, my man, you got tossed into the right dumpster.” ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2008, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-vulgar-obscene-blasphemous-profane-or-otherwise-nsfw-quotations/463224/63 "2008-09-18T19:36:21Z")
Mr. Garrison, from South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut: “I don’t trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn’t die.” ---
**Author:** ![Influential\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Influential\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Influential_Panda)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-vulgar-obscene-blasphemous-profane-or-otherwise-nsfw-quotations/463224/64 "2008-09-20T04:16:02Z")
Walter Sobchak: Saturday, Donny, is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That means that I don’t work, I don’t get in a car, I don’t fucking ride in a car, I don’t pick up the phone, I don’t turn on the oven, and I sure as shit **DON’T FUCKING ROLL!!** Shomer shabbos! ---
**Author:** ![Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ed655f/32.png) [@Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crown_Prince_of_Irony)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-vulgar-obscene-blasphemous-profane-or-otherwise-nsfw-quotations/463224/65 "2008-09-20T05:59:27Z")
The all-time classic - from _Clerks._: ‘Happy-Scrappy’ Mom: Excuse me, do you sell videos? Randal Graves: Yeah, what’re you looking for? ‘Happy-Scrappy’ Mom: Happy Scrappy Hero Pup. Randal Graves: Uh, once second. I’m on the phone with the distribution house now, lemme make sure they got it. ‘Happy-Scrappy’ Mom: 'Kay. Randal Graves: What’s it called again? ‘Happy-Scrappy’ Mom: Happy Scrappy Hero Pup. ‘Happy-Scrappy’ Kid: Happy Scrappy! ‘Happy-Scrappy’ Mom: She loves it. Randal Graves: Obviously. Uh, yeah, hi. This is RST Video calling. Customer number 4352, I’d like to place an order. Okay, I need one each of the following tapes: “Whispers in the Wind”, “To Each His Own”, “Put It Where It Doesn’t Belong”, “My Pipes Need Cleaning”, “All Tit-Fucking Volume 8”, “I Need Your Cock”, “Ass-Worshipping Rim-Jobbers”, “My Cunt and Eight Shafts”, “Cum Clean”, “Cum-Gargling Naked Sluts”, “Cum Buns III”, “Cumming in Socks”, “Cum On Eileen”, “Huge Black Cocks with Pearly White Cum”, “Girls Who Crave Cock”, “Girls Who Crave Cunt”, “Men Alone II: The KY Connection”, “Pink Pussy Lips”, oh, yeah, and, uh, “All Holes Filled with Hard Cock”. Yup. Oh, wait a minute. Uh, what was that called again? ---
**Author:** ![Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ed655f/32.png) [@Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crown_Prince_of_Irony)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2008, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-vulgar-obscene-blasphemous-profane-or-otherwise-nsfw-quotations/463224/66 "2008-09-20T06:06:30Z")
Damn, just missed the edit window - I just saw on review that **Krokodil** posted the Happy Scrappy Hero Pup bit on page 1. But it’s so damn funny it **deserves** to be posted twice. Yeah. . . [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-greatest-vulgar-obscene-blasphemous-profane-or-otherwise-nsfw-quotations/463224.md?page=3)