# The I need answer fast game. **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [January 26, 2009, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119 "2009-01-26T20:38:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Bootis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e8c25b/32.png) [@Bootis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bootis)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2009, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/61 "2009-01-29T05:00:36Z")
I think you may be in luck, Hasn’t monkey poo been used in the past to successfully impregnate cold weather gnomes? Does anyone know the manual overide code for the RT2100-a Hydrolic Magno Vice + Testicle rest? Need Answer Fast. ---
**Author:** ![willthekittensurvive](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/91b2a8/32.png) [@willthekittensurvive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/willthekittensurvive)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2009, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/62 "2009-01-29T07:31:21Z")
> [@Bootis](#): > > Does anyone know the manual overide code for the RT2100-a Hydrolic Magno Vice + Testicle rest? Need Answer Fast. Just pull the plug * * * Everyone around me is getting the Flu, this year it seams to be a nasty one. I have issues with accepting help, do not like others to see me sick, and do not want people to come and nurse me. I live alone and have a fridge but no freezer, what would be smart preparations to make for a week of incapacitation? need advice fast( feeling a bit nauseous allready) ---
**Author:** ![DfrntBreign](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f6c823/32.png) [@DfrntBreign](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DfrntBreign)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2009, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/63 "2009-01-29T11:29:59Z")
> [@willthekittensurvive](#): > > Just pull the plug > > * * * > > Everyone around me is getting the Flu, this year it seams to be a nasty one. > I have issues with accepting help, do not like others to see me sick, and do not want people to come and nurse me. > > I live alone and have a fridge but no freezer, what would be smart preparations to make for a week of incapacitation? > > need advice fast( feeling a bit nauseous allready) Get all the “Chicken Soup” MREs you can get yer hands on and lots of water. (Don’t forget the crackers and ginger ale and the kitten food.) Put blankets, TV remotes and lots of sappy movies where you can reach them. And Kleenex. Lot’s of Kleenex. A Big plastic bowl nearby can come in handy, too. I have the owner of Ticketmaster tied up in my living room. He’s already signed over his entire financial empire to me. Should I announce the new “Fair or Free” pricing policy before or after I turn him over to the angry mob outside? ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2009, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/64 "2009-01-29T15:05:40Z")
After. Let them vent their long-suppressed rage on him before they hoist you to their shoulders in adulation. I’ve been in the whaling biz for a long time, and for quite awhile have wanted to catch this particular whale. Some people think I’m obsessed with it, but they just don’t understand. Now I see this damned whale is swimming straight at my ship. We’re becalmed. What should I do? Need answer fast. ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2009, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/65 "2009-01-29T15:18:38Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#): > > I’ve been in the whaling biz for a long time, and for quite awhile have wanted to catch this particular whale. Some people think I’m obsessed with it, but they just don’t understand. Now I see this damned whale is swimming straight at my ship. We’re becalmed. What should I do? Need answer fast. Find an extremely good looking young sailor with a speech impediment. Have him falsely accused of mutiny and have him lash out in anger and accidentally kill his accuser. Try him, convict him, strap him to the mast, and then execute him. Help. I’m easily confused about 19th century American novelists named Herman. What should I do? Need answer fast. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2009, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/66 "2009-01-29T16:09:28Z")
Separate them into different genres, maybe, then alphabetically by their last names. It works in my local library. I am on a hillside as an avalanche has started - should I try and outrun the boulders, or dodge them…need answer fast! ---
**Author:** ![willthekittensurvive](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/91b2a8/32.png) [@willthekittensurvive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/willthekittensurvive)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2009, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/67 "2009-01-29T16:19:21Z")
> [@ivan\_astikov](#): > > I am on a hillside as an avalanche has started - should I try and outrun the boulders, or dodge them…need answer fast! Remember you don’ t have to outrun the avalanche…you only have to out run the person next to you! A family heirloom with some minor magical properties has come into my possession. I just found out it rightly belongs to the ruler of a neighbouring super power, apparently he is ready to go to war to get it back, he does not yet know I have it what would you do? need advice fast ---
**Author:** ![Trepa\_Mayfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@Trepa\_Mayfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trepa_Mayfield)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2009, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/68 "2009-01-29T16:49:09Z")
Give it to him. It’s not worth going to war over. I’m running down an alleyway, and I think something’s behind me, but every time I look, it’s just shadows, and these high heels really hurt. What should I do? ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2009, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/69 "2009-01-29T23:42:10Z")
Take off your shoes and go into the closest bar. By the time the ‘something’ catches up with you, you’ll be drunk enough not to care. There’s an undead dictator after me who wants to turn me into throw pillows. How do I get rid of him? Need answer fast, he’s got lockpicks and I’ve only two locks. ---
**Author:** ![Bootis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e8c25b/32.png) [@Bootis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bootis)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2009, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/70 "2009-01-30T00:40:15Z")
> [@Silver Tyger Girl](#): > > There’s an undead dictator after me who wants to turn me into throw pillows. How do I get rid of him? Need answer fast, he’s got lockpicks and I’ve only two locks. This happened to me a few years ago in Pittsburgh. I used one of the locks on a side door as a decoy, and the other lock I put in a sock. While he was picking the decoy, I socked him with the lock-in-sock, which knocked him out for 2 ticks. Enough time to grab his lock picks, onlock the decoy, and be off again, this time with 2 locks, pursued by an undead dictator with no lock picks. Where’s the “Unsend” button on hotmail? ---
**Author:** ![fisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@fisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fisha)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2009, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/71 "2009-01-30T01:27:22Z")
It’s labeled “reply to all.” Help! Being chased by the abominable snowman wielding a chainsaw and a pack of Pall Mall straights. Need answer fast. ---
**Author:** ![Arachne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Arachne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arachne)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2009, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/72 "2009-01-30T02:20:51Z")
Lend the poor guy your lighter! I’ve been climbing up this water spout all day, but I hear thunder in the distance, what should I do? ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2009, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/73 "2009-01-30T03:42:36Z")
> [@Arachne](#): > > Lend the poor guy your lighter! > > I’ve been climbing up this water spout all day, but I hear thunder in the distance, what should I do? Look around and see if you can construct some kind of a rudimentary lathe… Need answer fast. Car is in a spin, do I tap the breaks lightly or accelerate through it? I could never remember which way is correct. Getting dizzy too. ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2009, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/74 "2009-01-30T05:25:05Z")
(Bored so I’ll answer my own one…) Do not operate heavy machinery if dizzyness occurs! Therefore, bail out. Klaatu barada nnn…? nyyy…? Need help fast. ---
**Author:** ![Hoopy\_Frood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hoopy_frood/32/8452_2.png) [@Hoopy\_Frood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hoopy_Frood)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2009, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/75 "2009-01-30T13:50:36Z")
> [@Isamu](#): > > (Bored so I’ll answer my own one…) > > Do not operate heavy machinery if dizzyness occurs! Therefore, bail out. > > Klaatu barada nnn..? nyyy…? Need help fast. It’s Klaatu barada Neerrrgghghhmmmmmmpppp! There, you said the words! Did he fire six shots or only five? I’ve never been one to feel lucky so I need the answer fast! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2009, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/76 "2009-01-30T14:30:49Z")
You’re askin’ the wrong guy, punk. Just won a big war, feel exhausted, and want to spend the night at home but my wife insists on going to the theatre to see a silly comedy. Short of just ordering her - she never takes well to that, despite my title - how can I get my way? Need answer fast. ---
**Author:** ![Sparky812](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb9ed0/32.png) [@Sparky812](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sparky812)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2009, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/77 "2009-01-30T14:40:15Z")
Start fight about her eating habits or her mother. She won’t want to go anywhere with you for a while. What excuse should I use to leave early today? Need help fast. I’d like to be back in bed by 10:00 ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2009, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/78 "2009-01-31T03:35:12Z")
Have you tried calling in dead? Help! There’s a raptor outside and I think he’s trying to figure out the doorknob! ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2009, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/79 "2009-01-31T03:40:02Z")
> [@Silver Tyger Girl](#): > > Help! There’s a raptor outside and I think he’s trying to figure out the doorknob! It’s Chris Bosh. You’ll be fine. I’m starting to bleed uncontrollably from my hands, feet, and the left side. I have no visible injuries, but I need help fast. ---
**Author:** ![Bacon\_Salt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/65b543/32.png) [@Bacon\_Salt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bacon_Salt)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2009, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119/80 "2009-01-31T03:45:58Z")
Oh, you whining little-- walk it off. Jesus Christ. So, I accepted a contract job a few months ago and tomorrow’s my first day. My first order of business is to give a motivational speech, but it’s supposed to rain tomorrow. And? It’s _freezing_ outside. There is, of course, no place indoors big enough to house the crowd so I’m stuck delivering the speech outdoors. Maybe I should break down and use an umbrella, or at least wear a hat? Need answer fast, don’t actually own an umbrella, will need to run out and buy one. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-i-need-answer-fast-game/483119.md?page=5)