# The Jehovahs Witlesses called today **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 29, 2009, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596 "2009-01-29T19:24:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2009, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/61 "2009-01-30T21:47:29Z")
We had a sexual assault around here recently where two men posed as Jehovas Witnesses and attacked a woman. That sort of thing might put a stop to door-to-door solicitations. ---
**Author:** ![raindog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@raindog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raindog)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2009, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/62 "2009-01-30T23:45:28Z")
> [@What\_Exit](#): > > Could you possible take the time to explain this? I apologize. It’s a snarky reference to the fact that the Christian faith was _built_ on the type of proselytizing that the JWs are known and reviled for. It is a myth that everywhere Jesus went people swooned over him. To be sure, many were receptive to his message. In as many cases, however, he met with stiff opposition and in more than one occasion he had to run for his life. The commission he gave his Apostles required the same type of door-to-door, village-to-village, synagogue-to-synagogue, town center-to-town center evangelizing. (which they dutifully carried out) Whatever the JW message, it remains true that their “ministry”, no matter how objectionable, is not dissimilar to the methods employed by Jesus, Paul & Co. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2009, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/63 "2009-01-30T23:52:55Z")
You have a point **Raindog**.But there is an important difference. The Apostles were preaching a message that their audience had not heard before. The JWs are preaching to people who have already heard all about Jesus. ---
**Author:** ![raindog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@raindog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raindog)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2009, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/64 "2009-01-31T00:07:31Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > You have a point **Raindog**.But there is an important difference. The Apostles were preaching a message that their audience had not heard before. The JWs are preaching to people who have already heard all about Jesus. True, but I see nothing in the texts that indicates they were ever to stop. IOW, there seems to be nothing that indicates that once the message was ‘well known’ their job was done. In fact, one of many texts is **Matthew 24:14** ,\* “And this good news of the kingdom will be preached in the entire world as a witness to all the nations and then the end will come.”\* **Matthew 28:19-20** says \* “19Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in[a] the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”\* And there are many others. Also surely Jesus well known in certain parts----IOW, the fame of Jesus and his exploits preceded the Apostles in many cases. Sill, like Jesus there were many times where their message was eagerly accepted, and times when they were beaten, stoned and publicly flogged. Lastly, it is true that most people have heard of Jesus (in the whole world, actually) in the most general, oblique way. You may be surprised how little is known about him in the bible. For many, this knowledge or awareness is the first time they’ve ever heard it. ---
**Author:** ![Pazu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pazu/32/15522_2.png) [@Pazu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pazu)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2009, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/65 "2009-01-31T00:12:07Z")
> [@the raindog](#): > > Of course, I have no way of knowing whether this exchange took place or not. I have read enough of your posts (and the palpable, visceral bias attendant in them) to believe that they never said anything like that _at all._ In fact, I highly doubt they visited you in person _at all._ > > I’ll concede it may have happened. I am simply saying _I don’t believe you._ Coincidentally, that’s pretty much my response to JW proselytizing. ---
**Author:** ![raindog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@raindog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raindog)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2009, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/66 "2009-01-31T00:12:55Z")
> [@Pazu](#): > > Coincidentally, that’s pretty much my response to JW proselytizing. You’re not alone. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2009, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/67 "2009-01-31T14:01:26Z")
> [@the raindog](#): > > I’ll concede it may have happened. I am simply saying _I don’t believe you._ The reverse of that is the basis of many religious beliefs: Even if it didn’t happen, I believe it. ---
**Author:** ![cosmosdan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a6a055/32.png) [@cosmosdan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cosmosdan)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2009, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/68 "2009-01-31T14:08:28Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > Ask them if they’ve heard the good news about Amway. Now that’s funny. It would be great if you had pamphlets or something and kept interrupting their witnessing but had a huge goofy smile the whole time. I have a friend who does a great little kid on the phone for phone solicitors and has been known to do a great imitation of a mentally retarded adult. I hope the JW hit his place. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2009, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/69 "2009-01-31T15:15:18Z")
Oddly enough, I’ve found them to be fairly polite and considerate. I got the same initial “Hi, we’re… oh crap, a gaijin” reaction that **Pope Jewish** did. But once I said I wasn’t interested they said thanks and good-bye and never came back. No scare tactics on my part required beyond my typical Saturday-afternoon unkemptitude. The funny thing is that I lived less than a block from their church; I guess they all figured that anyone that close by had to have been visited already. ---
**Author:** ![EpiGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8c91f0/32.png) [@EpiGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EpiGirl)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2009, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/70 "2009-01-31T16:07:29Z")
I had to make an extra trip around the block when they came by one day (it wasn’t a Saturday and it wasn’t very early) while I was driving home from a trip out and they were approaching my front door! Besides that, not many JW come by here. Maybe I just sleep through their doorbell rings. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2009, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/71 "2009-01-31T16:47:18Z")
> [@razncain](#): > > [http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9E06E5DD1639F931A35755C0A963958260&partner=rssnyt&emc=rss](http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9E06E5DD1639F931A35755C0A963958260&partner=rssnyt&emc=rss) > > Hell of a way to go. I wonder how they reported that story in their church bulletin. > > razncain I think it is terrific that the Air Force was on the job protecting the community, but why did they use an entire plane rather than just strafe or bomb? I guess they forgot to arm up before they launched. Anyway, congratulations to them for a job well done, but points off for not using a more fiscally responsible method. ---
**Author:** ![kitemaker\_chuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a88e4f/32.png) [@kitemaker\_chuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kitemaker_chuck)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2009, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/72 "2009-02-01T03:59:35Z")
I kinda’ like it when the JWs appear on my doorstep. I’m pretty good at “double-talk”, so I can take control of the conversation and send them on their merry way in a slightly more confused condition than they were when they first knocked on my door. ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2009, 8:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/73 "2009-02-01T08:16:39Z")
> [@PopeJewish](#): > > I had an amusing run in with some JWs a couple months back. > > See, back in America, I always just used to say “I’m jewish” and they’d leave me alone (perhaps because very few jews convert, or just assuming I was going to hell anyway or something, even though we don’t believe in hell). Neither do they, not the eternal tormenty kind, anyway. ---
**Author:** ![PopeJewish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@PopeJewish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PopeJewish)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2009, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/74 "2009-02-02T02:04:08Z")
> [@Apocalypso](#): > > I’ve only been accosted one time. Why are there always 2 of them? Anyway, I opened my door, and there they were with their pamphlets, suits, and shiny 1950’s haircuts. > “Hi, do you believe in god?” > I smiled and said "oh good, I’m a Satanist and we have so few opportunities to learn about " \ “The enemy” > “Won’t you please come in? I can tell you a little bit about the Church of Satan and our works, and we can compare notes”. > > Haven’t seen them since. > > For the record, I’m not a Satanist. Satanists don’t believe God is the enemy, more that the church is the enemy. WHat most people don’t know is that the Church of Satan is more a hedonistic anti-religion that goes against the church, not a devil-worshipping cult that is against god. I’m actually good friends with a Lavey\* (Anton Lavey\*\* started the Church of Satan) and I’ve watched many of the videos and read a lot of their materials. I’d equate it more with something like Dischordianism of today. Sure they did weird ceremonies calling on satan and stuff (and did lots of drugs), but it was more about indulging in human desires, which they felt satan represented, rather than summoning devils to kill people or turn them away from god or something silly of the sort. of particular interest to this discussion are the first two (of eleven) Satan Rules of the Earth > [@](#): > > 1. Do not give opinions or advice unless you are asked. > 2. Do not tell your troubles to others unless you are sure they want to hear them I also recommend you read up on the Nine Satanic Statements which can be found at wikipedia: [Church of Satan - Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Church_of_satan) I’m in no way endorsing the COS, btw, they charge a $200 admittance fee which I think is stupid 😛 > [@FriarTed](#): > > Neither do they, not the eternal tormenty kind, anyway. I did not know that, thanks. \*[sub]my friend is not a satanist, he’s not really religious at all. He did date a devoted catholic for several years, though[/sub] \*\*[sub]fun trivia! Did you know that Church of Satan, which started in Anton Lavey’s house, began as a weekly poetry reading session?[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2009, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/75 "2009-02-02T03:22:26Z")
My last encounter with JWs ended with my telling them I was a devil worshiper and inviting them to come back next full moon and choke a chicken with me. The dust from their leaving hung in the air for hours. ---
**Author:** ![raindog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@raindog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raindog)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2009, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/76 "2009-02-02T03:31:47Z")
> [@Clothahump](#): > > My last encounter with JWs ended with my telling them I was a devil worshiper and inviting them to come back next full moon and choke a chicken with me. > > The dust from their leaving hung in the air for hours. Does this meme ever get tired? ---
**Author:** ![Vox\_Imperatoris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Vox\_Imperatoris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vox_Imperatoris)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2009, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/77 "2009-02-02T04:43:30Z")
> [@PopeJewish](#): > > I did not know that, thanks. If I recall correctly, they believe that everyone dies and stays that way until the Second Coming, when Jesus saves the good ones and annihilates the souls of everyone else. Valete, Vox Imperatoris ETA: So ironically, they don’t believe anything worse happens to atheists than the atheists themselves believe will happen. ---
**Author:** ![Jolly\_Roger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/91b2a8/32.png) [@Jolly\_Roger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jolly_Roger)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2009, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/78 "2009-02-02T05:02:16Z")
> [@hotflungwok](#): > > When I was in college a JW showed up one day and I gave her a ‘not interested’ kind of answer. She asked if I was a college student, and when I said yes, she said that a lot of people lose faith, etc when they go to college. > > A week later, I answer the door to see two very tall and imposing JWs, who asked me if I wanted to debate religion with them. These guys were big, both would have to duck to get into my doorway. I declined. I wonder when JWs started using enforcers. they used a different tack with me. they sent an incredibly hot chick! Yes, they sent a girl that while dressed conservatively, was freakin’ smokin’ to my house. it worked sort of. i let her in. i served her coffee. We talked. I never converted or anything, but she came over every weekend or so and we talked about God and all. Eventually i think we just became kind of friends and the religion thing fell apart. Sttill, it was a clever move. I never would have bothered otherwisw but I was in my early 20s and hell, this girl was freakin’ hotter than lava. ---
**Author:** ![stucky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@stucky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stucky)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2009, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/79 "2009-02-02T05:42:15Z")
When the JW’s asked if they could discuss religion with us my wife responded "Yes, but we are Catholic and we always pray the Rosary before discussing religious matters. They quickly excused themselves and never came back. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2009, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596/80 "2009-02-02T07:28:29Z")
I give them Halloween candy and wish them a happy day. It works. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-jehovahs-witlesses-called-today/483596.md?page=5)