# The kanicbird konundrum

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kanicbird-konundrum/603802>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [November 22, 2011, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kanicbird-konundrum/603802 "2011-11-22T22:09:21Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 1\
**Showing post:** 8

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**Author:** ![steronz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steronz/32/11765_2.png) [@steronz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steronz)\
**Post date:** [November 22, 2011, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kanicbird-konundrum/603802/8 "2011-11-22T22:27:02Z")

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I’ve seen some crazy kanicbird shit before, but that thread truly has some epic gems. For those who’d rather not wade through them:

> [@Your explaination for this work of God](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-explaination-for-this-work-of-god/603223/254):
>
> I had a cop stop me while I was with 3 people who where fairly to very drunk, and I have also has some to drink. There were open bottles of wine in my car, and I was exceeding the speed limit by a fair amount when he started his pursuit.
> 
> At my side appeared Arch Angel Micheal who told the officer ‘you are not needed here, I am watching over them’, the officer immediately returned my license wished me a good day and returned to his car.
> 
> When you are doing God’s work you are above earthly authority.

In response to, “How was the stripper party?”:

> [@Your explaination for this work of God](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-explaination-for-this-work-of-god/603223/304):
>
> Actually pretty boarding. Strippers are not sexual to me. Years ago I had a demonic being called a succubus, from about age 2 to well into adulthood. That relationship had to be split by God which was done. But in the vein of all things working for the good, I found out about incredible levels of sexuality well beyond what I believe anyone here has experienced. What the strippers appear to me is small children putting on a play, nothing more.
> 
> Now on the other side I have been able to bring that incredible into my life at the appropriate time with the right person and a person who wants to experience those things.
> 
> But the trip was good as I did have a enjoyable time talking before the show and hope that a failing marriage can be reunited and a life restored.

Why doesn’t he just not go to the stripper parties, you might ask?

> [@Your explaination for this work of God](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/your-explaination-for-this-work-of-god/603223/359):
>
> One year I decided to not go, and state outright my objection based on standard Christian doctrine. The event still happened. After which I got the message taht I should have gone because the Lord has made me immune to lust (at least lust at that level) and I could have been useful for Him. The following year I went, though I tried to not go, let my g/f know I didn’t want to go but felt that I should go. Even though she objected to stripper parties in general she told me I need to go.
> 
> So while there one of the strippers came over to me and started a lap dance, in my eyes it was as if she was a totally innocent and young child, I was seeing her soul as Jesus sees her soul, just caught up in worldly ways, but with the innocence of a child. It was a amazing experience of God that I am very privileged to be a part of.

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