# The kids downstairs never go out and play: what's the deal?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [March 19, 2005, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363 "2005-03-19T23:16:25Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2005, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/1 "2005-03-19T23:16:25Z")
Ok, disclaimer: It’s none of my business, and I wouldn’t dream of making a comment or implying it them in any way.
But seriously. They’ve been living here for nearly a year now, and they never come out. I’ve met them, they’re like 8 and 6. We don’t live in a dangerous area at all, we live in an apartment complex in a nice town. There is room directly in front of the apartment windows for them to play a little. There is a GIANT lawn out back with lots of room; lots of other kids play there and the windows overlook it.
Whenever I come home they’re peeking out the windows for their dad to come home (they live with dad & grandma, I don’t know where the mom is). Today it was 40 degrees out, sunny, it’s Saturday, I didn’t see a peep. When the snow was perfect for snowballs, I didn’t see them come out. And even on the days we’ve been home all day, and I’ve been working on the balcony or something, they never come out. I suppose they might sneak out when I’m not there or something, but seriously, in a year, I’ve never seen these kids in the sunshine.
And, this may be relevant, they’re ultra-conservative Hindu. They repaint their porch every single day with Hindu religious symbols, and if we go downstairs to the door, we can hear the little ones praying loudly every evening, and singing religious songs. This seems to be their entire entertainment, or watching TV, which they do all day. They do go to school, at least.
What’s the deal? Perhaps Dopers can come up with a better reason to keep them indoors then I have. My version is not very charitable.
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### Author:  [@inkleberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/inkleberry)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2005, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/2 "2005-03-19T23:21:17Z")
Maybe they have that weird allergy to sunlight?
Maybe their family is concerned about strange/new cultures?
Maybe they hang out other places with children more like them in terms of religion and culture?
Maybe they are children of the corn?
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### Author:  [@Blue\_Ruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blue_Ruin)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2005, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/3 "2005-03-19T23:33:13Z")
Knowing how children are, if I held a strong religious belief and wanted to protect my children from sinful influences, I would limit their interactions with other children.
That would not explain why the children don’t get supervised outdoor playtime, though. I lived next door to some apparently devout Muslims (the woman covered everything except for her eyes and hands), but they still brought their children outside to play, and sometimes I’d talk with the parents while they watched their kids. Perhaps the parents are concerned about the cold temperatures, being from a more tropical climate.
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### Author:  [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/4 "2005-03-20T00:18:43Z")
Social Services might be interested in the home life of these children.
Are they attending school?
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### Author:  [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/5 "2005-03-20T00:39:30Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#):
>
> Social Services might be interested in the home life of these children.
> Are they attending school?
> [@Anaamika](#):
>
> They do go to school, at least.
Yep, they do. 😉
I’m interested in hearing some reasons as to why, too… I can’t think of too many good reasons as to why children should/are allowed to be pent up all day long with no sunshine. Is it even healthy?
But then, as another poster said, they may actually have an allergy/bad reaction to the sun. It’s rare, but it does occur. Other than that, though… seems a little weird, to me.
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### Author:  [@ratatoskK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratatoskK)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/6 "2005-03-20T00:50:04Z")
Since the grandmother cares for them, and the father works during the day… is the grandmother perhaps disabled, or feeble enough physically so that she cannot accompany the children outside for playtime?
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### Author:  [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/7 "2005-03-20T01:10:46Z")
My daughter doesn’t play outside at home very often because she requires a lot of supervision. I can’t just let her go out and play freely with the other kids because she’s special needs. However, she does go out a lot at school and she goes out a lot when we go over to my parent’s house. And in the summer we go to parks and such.
Maybe their situation is similar. Although it seems strange that two of them would be like that.
It’s good that you’re aware of the situation. I’d keep an eye on things for a while and see if there’s anything else strange going on. In my experience, deeply religious people can be weird about their kids and what they are allowed to do.
I wouldn’t say the current situation sounds like something for CPS though.
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### Author:  [@Trigonal\_Planar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trigonal_Planar)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/8 "2005-03-20T05:30:42Z")
I never played outside as a kid. Not because my parents forbid me (quite the contrary, usually they would yell at me for not going outside enough) but because I was (and still am) one of those weird pasty white kids who hates the outdoors.
In other words: I never played outdoors either.
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### Author:  [@davenportavenger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davenportavenger)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/9 "2005-03-20T05:55:38Z")
Maybe the father is worried about child predators, and the grandmother is too enfeebled to watch the kids all the time they’re outside. If the father gets home late, that could explain why they don’t go outside–too dark when he gets home.
I think people place too much importance on the power of sunlight and its effect on kids. These kids aren’t going to die if they don’t go outside. There are people who have spent 30+ years indoors and they’re still alive. I mean, if you can call that living. But it’s certainly not material for CFS, geez.
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### Author:  [@Bridget\_Burke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bridget_Burke)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/10 "2005-03-20T06:40:40Z")
Do the father or grandmother speak English? It’s fairly likely–many Indians do, especially those living in the USA.
So–you could ask the adults. Or, without getting that specific, generally make their acquaintance & see what’s going on with them. They are human beings.
Or you could just continue to spy upon those weird foreigners.
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### Author:  [@Omega\_Glory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omega_Glory)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/11 "2005-03-20T13:53:53Z")
IIRC, **Anaamika** is an Indian born in India, so I’ll bet she knows that her neighbors are human beings too.
As for the children, all of my ideas have all ready been said. I wouldn’t worry about them unless something else weird starts happening.
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### Author:  [@Zulema](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zulema)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/12 "2005-03-20T14:16:09Z")
> [@Bridget Burke](#):
>
> Or you could just continue to spy upon those weird foreigners.
Not to pick apart your grammar or anything but if you’re going to complain about the neighbors it’s more correct to say " _them_ weird foreigners".
🙂
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### Author:  [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/13 "2005-03-20T14:39:22Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#):
>
> Social Services might be interested in the home life of these children.
Based on what the OP has already witnessed, I don’t believe that this would be a good option and would definitely be bad for everyone involved. And on that note, I wouldn’t have been outside with 40 degree weather either when I was that age. If it’s under 70, it’s frickin’ cold!
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### Author:  [@doreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doreen)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/14 "2005-03-20T14:44:25Z")
Some kids don’t really like to play outside. But I kind of wonder, since you say that they can play with other kids on the giant lawn- is the lawn fenced in? If it’s not, that could be part of the reason. My kids spent a lot of time in the backyard when they were very young. If it hadn’t been fenced in, they wouldn’t have spent time outsdie alone at all. And if I was going to have to be outside to watch them, chances are I would have either taken them to a playground which would mean the neighbors wouldn’t have seen them playing, or they might have preferred to do something else entirely ( miniature golf, a local kiddie amusement park etc) as long as I was going to be taking them somewhere.
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### Author:  [@KGS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KGS)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/15 "2005-03-20T18:33:13Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#):
>
> Social Services might be interested in the home life of these children.
Oh, geez. The kids spend all their time indoors, so let’s get CPS involved, because _obviously_ they’re being abused. Gimme a break. :rolleyes:
What kind of logic leads up to this kind of conclusion?
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### Author:  [@psycat90](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psycat90)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/16 "2005-03-20T19:02:46Z")
> [@KGS](#):
>
> Oh, geez. The kids spend all their time indoors, so let’s get CPS involved, because _obviously_ they’re being abused. Gimme a break. :rolleyes:
>
> What kind of logic leads up to this kind of conclusion?
My thoughts precisely. I can just imagine that call. “Well, there are these neighbor kids, and they go to school, but they never play outside. And I just know they are watching TV :shudder:, and oh dear, sometimes I hear them _praying_.”
Unbelievable.
As far as living in an area that is not dangerous, when it comes to young kids, there is no such thing.
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### Author:  [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/17 "2005-03-20T20:00:42Z")
First of all, I am not calling CPS - the kids seem happy enough, and they go to school. It doesn’t seem like abuse, rather, overprotectiveness.
> [@ratatoskK](#):
>
> Since the grandmother cares for them, and the father works during the day… is the grandmother perhaps disabled, or feeble enough physically so that she cannot accompany the children outside for playtime?
The grandmother isn’t enfeebled. She’s pretty spry, as a matter of fact. I just feel kind of bad for the kiddies, since I hear them sometimes running around and kicking up a ruckus indoors. It’s never at times I mind, and the poor kids do need to get out their excess energy, but the outdoors is good for kids!
> [@Bridget Burke](#):
>
> Do the father or grandmother speak English? It’s fairly likely–many Indians do, especially those living in the USA.
> So–you could ask the adults. Or, without getting that specific, generally make their acquaintance & see what’s going on with them. They are human beings.Or you could just continue to spy upon those weird foreigners.
:rolleyes: Thanks, I speak \*good \* Engrish, being an Indian living in the USA. Why does someone always have to come along and think they know what they’re talking about enough to be snippy? Do you always come along and snipe at people for no reason? I’m Indian, too. I don’t think they’re weird _foreigners_, just _weird_. When I was a kid I spent every spare minute I wasn’t doing my homework outside.
**Omega Glory** , thanks for defending me.
> [@psycat90](#):
>
> As far as living in an area that is not dangerous, when it comes to young kids, there is no such thing.
I guess. But kids have been playing outside since the beginning of time. There are plenty of safe places they could play, under supervision, if Grandma goes with them. We even have a swingset in our subdivision, where other kids go all the time.
> [@ParentalAdvisory](#):
>
> And on that note, I wouldn’t have been outside with 40 degree weather either when I was that age. If it’s under 70, it’s frickin’ cold!
But…you never went out playing in the snow? I grew up in Michigan, I just got bundled up a lot and then sent out. I know they’ve been in this country for at least five years and in NY for 3 (I do talk to them “weird furriners”) so it’s not really a shock that it’s cold.
More news: I found out that he owns an Indian restaurant, and he’s out there a lot. Sometimes the Grandma goes too, and they leave the kids at home for hours at a time sometimes! I don’t know how late in the evening they leave them, though.
I should have put a big giant proviso on the first post: I DO NOT THINK THESE KIDS ARE BEING ABUSED! I just wonder, that’s all. I’m thinking \*\*Bosda \*\* didn’t catch the line about them going to school, and that’s why he mentioned CPS.
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### Author:  [@Savannah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Savannah)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/18 "2005-03-20T22:04:33Z")
If I were you, and noticed that the kids never went outside and played, I’d also wonder about it. I too, as a child, was frequently sent outside to play. The few kids around here seem to all go outside and play. I’d be curious as to why these kids didn’t go outside and play.
It’s human nature to be curious about things we observe–or don’t–and to speculate. It doesn’t mean we suspect the worse, or are convinced that something unsettling is going on.
Wondering about it seems normal to me. Does this make sense?
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### Author:  [@Ross](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ross)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/19 "2005-03-20T22:15:36Z")
It’s not quite _nothing_, but it’s not enough to call social services or anything.
If I were you I’d post it on the internet and see if anyone has anything interesting to say.
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### Author:  [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2005, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-kids-downstairs-never-go-out-and-play-whats-the-deal/295363/20 "2005-03-20T22:45:19Z")
> [@Savannah](#):
>
> If I were you, and noticed that the kids never went outside and played, I’d also wonder about it. I too, as a child, was frequently sent outside to play. The few kids around here seem to all go outside and play. I’d be curious as to why these kids didn’t go outside and play.
>
> It’s human nature to be curious about things we observe–or don’t–and to speculate. It doesn’t mean we suspect the worse, or are convinced that something unsettling is going on.
>
> Wondering about it seems normal to me. Does this make sense?
Thank you. This is exactly how I felt. So I came to my friends on the message board!
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