# The King of Pop Finally Cracks

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-king-of-pop-finally-cracks/117780>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [July 7, 2002, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-king-of-pop-finally-cracks/117780 "2002-07-07T15:22:20Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 5

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**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-king-of-pop-finally-cracks/117780/81 "2002-07-10T21:37:17Z")

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What you guys are dismissing as weirdness is actually a well-disguised but very clever career move.

With his pasty-white skin and freakishly small nose, he’ll be perfect when he’s tapped to play Voldemort in the fourth Harry Potter film and onward.

All he’ll have to do is burn off his hair again, and they’ll need to get someone to dub in a low-pitched voice.

I’ll bet his brothers are eager for work…

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**Author:** ![Bob\_Scene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Bob\_Scene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bob_Scene)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2002, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-king-of-pop-finally-cracks/117780/82 "2002-07-10T23:17:14Z")

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If you’re interested in Michael Jackson’s plastic surgery history, here’s a document from the Smoking Gun containing some bizarre allegations of abuse he suffered at the hands of his surgeon. Among other things, the surgeon’s accused of anesthetizing him for a few minutes, waking him up, and charging him for surgery that was never done.

[http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/psurgeon1.shtml](http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/psurgeon1.shtml)

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**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2002, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-king-of-pop-finally-cracks/117780/83 "2002-07-11T00:18:04Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by FallenAngel \*  
> \*\*Hell, call it Jan. 20, 1981, if we’re doing a pool. \*\*

Isn’t that the date when a landing ship was sighted near Roswell? My guess is that this was when the real MJ was abducted and replaced with a Green. The Green’s prosthetic face has been gradually deteriorating over time. Meanwhile, the real MJ has spent the last twenty-one years being anally probed. If you fight for MJ, you are fighting for the entire human race.

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**Author:** ![Seven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Seven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seven)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2002, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-king-of-pop-finally-cracks/117780/84 "2002-07-11T00:31:56Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Jodi \*  
> **With all his money, he has not supported black causes, he has not attempted to publicize black problems, and he has not raised up other minority artists – all of which he undoubtedly could have done.**

Oh I dunno. I think giving McCully Culkin “lap rides” did a lot for the plight of the black man.

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**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2002, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-king-of-pop-finally-cracks/117780/85 "2002-07-11T03:24:40Z")

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\*\*

> [@](#):
>
> Oh, I dunno,. I think giving McCully Culkin “lap rides” did alot for the plight of the black man. \*\*

_snort_

Has Jesse Jackson poked his nose into this business yet?

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