# The Large Hadron Collider has failed to bring catastrophe. I am vexed. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 10, 2008, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972 "2008-09-10T18:55:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/21 "2008-09-10T20:41:46Z")
Watch out our it’ll go after Uranus next. _chortles_ ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/22 "2008-09-10T20:53:02Z")
> [@MacTech](#): > > Yayy, 'Mika’s back! 😃 > And there was much rejoicing! Seconded. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/23 "2008-09-10T20:53:38Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > Seconded. 🙂 Aww, thanks! Although the ‘Uranus’ comment should have been yours. ---
**Author:** ![UncleRojelio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unclerojelio/32/3160_2.png) [@UncleRojelio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleRojelio)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/24 "2008-09-10T20:55:20Z")
> [@Kythereia](#): > > Seriously? > > I thought it was safe to stop worrying today. ☹ I felt like I was going to barf all week… Yeah, the current plan for the first collision experiments to occur on Oct 21, so you still have until then to get your affairs in order. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/25 "2008-09-10T21:04:32Z")
> [@UncleRojelio](#): > > Yeah, the current plan for the first collision experiments to occur on Oct 21, so you still have until then to get your affairs in order. Brilliant. Now I have a month to freak out and not sleep at night. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/26 "2008-09-10T21:07:02Z")
They still need to be very careful. After all, colliding large hadrons is frot with danger. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/27 "2008-09-10T21:22:01Z")
You mean ‘fraught’? ---
**Author:** ![DiggitCamara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/df788c/32.png) [@DiggitCamara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiggitCamara)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/28 "2008-09-10T21:47:13Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > Yay! Well, thanks! > > Atom Smasher is a cool name, but it doesn’t match up to Large Hadron Collider, I’m sorry. Even cooler: they don’t actually know if there even are Hadrons at all. It’s what they’re trying to find out. They should have named it the Large “No-Obtanium” Collider. ---
**Author:** ![42fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/4/b487fb/32.png) [@42fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/42fish)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/29 "2008-09-10T22:09:13Z")
> [@Kythereia](#): > > Brilliant. Now I have a month to freak out and not sleep at night. Or a month to max out your credit cards. ---
**Author:** ![Lamar\_Mundane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lamar\_Mundane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamar_Mundane)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/30 "2008-09-10T22:14:45Z")
We have a black hole over here, but it’s a small one. I hitched my beltloop to a heavy bookshelf with a carabiner, and I’m OK. I keep forgetting and setting down my pens and - zip! - they fly off! I’m thinking of tying a rope to my trousers and glueing cat food containers around the edge of the hole. Should clear the neighborhood of the yowly vermin. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/31 "2008-09-10T22:16:06Z")
Hadron collider. Bah. Doc Proton and I once built an accellerater that collided grapefruit. Now that was a good time! ---
**Author:** ![Nancarrow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c37758/32.png) [@Nancarrow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nancarrow)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/32 "2008-09-10T22:29:30Z")
> [@DiggitCamara](#): > > Even cooler: they don’t actually know if there even are Hadrons at all. It’s what they’re trying to find out. > > They should have named it the Large “No-Obtanium” Collider. [Serious for a moment]It’s been a while since I studied\* particle physics, but I believe hadrons are the class of elementary particle that includes the protons and neutrons we all know and love. They’re smashing protons together to see what particles come out. I suppose they should have called it the ‘Large Proton Collider’.[/SFAM] \*by ‘studied’ I mean, played lots of computer games, got the lecture notes a week before the exam, freaked out and decided to put all my trust in thermal and statistical physics - not very successfully as I recall. ---
**Author:** ![DiggitCamara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/df788c/32.png) [@DiggitCamara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiggitCamara)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/33 "2008-09-10T22:52:10Z")
> [@Nancarrow](#): > > [Serious for a moment]It’s been a while since I studied\* particle physics, but I believe hadrons are the class of elementary particle that includes the protons and neutrons we all know and love. They’re smashing protons together to see what particles come out. I suppose they should have called it the ‘Large Proton Collider’.[/SFAM] > > \*by ‘studied’ I mean, played lots of computer games, got the lecture notes a week before the exam, freaked out and decided to put all my trust in thermal and statistical physics - not very successfully as I recall. [Right you are](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hadrons). I got them confused with the [Higgs Boson](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boson) which are what they actually are trying to observe. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/34 "2008-09-10T23:05:47Z")
> [@Captain\_Carrot](#): > > You mean ‘fraught’? Hey, why single him out? Every person in this confusing pornographic thread has repeatedly misspelled “hard on”. ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/35 "2008-09-10T23:10:04Z")
It has already happened. We’re all antimatter now. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/36 "2008-09-10T23:12:51Z")
> [@Manduck](#): > > It has already happened. We’re all antimatter now. Nah. I just did the antimatter test. I ate some chocolate. It tasted like chocolate. Chocolate composed of antimatter tastes like antichocolate, also known as vanilla. ---
**Author:** ![Xema](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9de053/32.png) [@Xema](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xema)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/37 "2008-09-10T23:17:53Z")
> [@Manduck](#): > > We’re all antimatter now. Well, at least Keynes had a good long innings. ---
**Author:** ![Indistinguishable](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/90ced4/32.png) [@Indistinguishable](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indistinguishable)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/38 "2008-09-10T23:22:23Z")
> [@Xema](#): > > Well, at least Keynes had a good long innings. [True, though the Americans had already taken over in 2001.](http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/002877.html) ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/39 "2008-09-10T23:27:13Z")
> [@](#): > > Brilliant. Now I have a month to freak out and not sleep at night. Out of curiosity, do you routinely lay awake at night worried about the possibility that the Sun might fail to rise tomorrow morning? Because that’s about the same amount of risk as is involved with the LHC. The absolute worst-case scenario is that a bunch of expensive laboratory equipment gets ruined. Well, I suppose there could also be a few hour power outage in Geneva, if there’s a surge that blows out a few transformers. ---
**Author:** ![shantih](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f6c823/32.png) [@shantih](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shantih)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2008, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972/40 "2008-09-10T23:32:50Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > Nah. I just did the antimatter test. I ate some chocolate. It tasted like chocolate. Chocolate composed of antimatter tastes like antichocolate, also known as vanilla. Now you’re just being silly. Everyone knows that antichocolate tastes like white chocolate. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-large-hadron-collider-has-failed-to-bring-catastrophe-i-am-vexed/462972.md?page=3)