# The last two game characters you played as fight. Who wins? **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [January 23, 2015, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679 "2015-01-23T15:26:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Boogly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Boogly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boogly)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/21 "2015-01-23T19:21:49Z")
Dargon Age Origins (ranger/assassin)vs FTL AE Spaceship wins of course, until the ship jumps and Agent DA:O is back with random shtuff until FTLShip dies. FTLShip RAGES, FU DA:O character I’m never flying AGAIN! This is such BS! [ShipJumpNoise]Well, maybe just one more try…[/SJN] ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/22 "2015-01-23T19:26:27Z")
Donkey Kong beats Luigi ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/23 "2015-01-23T19:56:08Z")
_Dragon Age Inquisition_ vs _Wolfenstein: The New Order_ The Inquisitor is almost immediately turned into a fine pink spray by B.J. Blazkowicz, driving home the age-old lesson of bringing a dual-dagger rogue to a Nazi Laserkraftwerk fight. ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/24 "2015-01-23T20:37:16Z")
> [@AncientHumanoid](#): > > Donkey Kong beats Luigi Another old-timer! Glad to meet you! ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/25 "2015-01-23T20:41:32Z")
> [@astorian](#): > > Another old-timer! Glad to meet you! Yeah, I still play some classics from time to time. I graduated HS in '81, so those classics were my arcade funs. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/26 "2015-01-23T21:29:08Z")
Oh, and I just realized that the OP didn’t specify _video_ games. But I’m pretty sure that the main character of almost any video game could mop the floor with my 3rd-level D&D warlock. Being able to break stuff, summon swarms of [del]butterflies[/del]bats, and zap things for about as much damage as a sword from 60’ away are all handy, but don’t really compare with psionically crushing peoples’ minds, or even with shooting them with a gun. ---
**Author:** ![buckgully](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eb9ed0/32.png) [@buckgully](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buckgully)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/27 "2015-01-23T21:42:02Z")
Warcaster Allison Jakes and her warjack “Bandit” from Warmachine Tactics vs Jebidiah Kerbin and the MunDoom Express Mk. XIV from Kerbal Space Program. What it lacks in offensive weaponry, the MunDoom Express makes up for in pure explosive potential. Anything that the warcaster might try would take place well inside of the minimum safe distance of the launch vehicle’s ground zero. If Jakes would attempt anything, including (but not limited to) looking at the rocket the wrong way or exhaling at an inopportune moment, would likely mean that all parties involved would die in a firey nightmare of exploding cryogenic fuel and solid rocket boosters flying off in random directions. Conclusion: The only way to win is not to play. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/28 "2015-01-23T21:56:27Z")
Salvador, level 61 Gunzerker from Borderlands 2 vs Lara Croft, Tomb Raider. Salvador has a shield, sniper rifles, and homing grenades, so it’s really no contest. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/29 "2015-01-23T22:10:07Z")
Ah, a “versus” argument, I like those. Corvo Attano from Dishonored, versus Ajay Ghale from Far Cry 4. Ajay has much more powerful and longer ranged weapons and some boosts from Syringes (the seeing enemies through walls power from the Hunting Syringe should help a lot). Corvo on the other hand can see enemies through walls too, teleport and stop time for short periods. Corvo _probably_ wins, I think. If he has enough spiritual elixirs he can spam Bend Time starting quite a ways away, getting in close enough to cut Ajay’s throat before he can react. Although if Ajay sees him first he can use sniper fire or a rocket to take Corvo out long range before he knows what’s happening. It would be a lot more even contest if I’d picked something other than Bend Time last item I played Dishonored. ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/30 "2015-01-23T23:24:07Z")
Colossus from Marvel Heroes vs my Guild Wars 2 warrior… Hmm, i have to go with Colossus. My warrior is only level 20. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/31 "2015-01-23T23:29:25Z")
I’m pretty sure my archdemon-killing, Blight-surviving, Morrigan-boning and all-around overgeared _Dragon Age:Origins_ warden could mess up\* Don’t Starve\*'s Wilson just by being in his general vicinity. Hell, he could just wait it out - \*he \*doesn’t have to dig up carrots every five minutes. ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2015, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/32 "2015-01-23T23:31:07Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Oh, and I just realized that the OP didn’t specify _video_ games. But I’m pretty sure that the main character of almost any video game could mop the floor with my 3rd-level D&D warlock. Being able to break stuff, summon swarms of [del]butterflies[/del]bats, and zap things for about as much damage as a sword from 60’ away are all handy, but don’t really compare with psionically crushing peoples’ minds, or even with shooting them with a gun. Oh man, I had board game night last night. I wonder if Mrs. White from Clue could beat one of the dwarves from Saboteur. The dwarf, being a strong miner, is a contender. However, Mrs. White has been shown to have the potential and follow-through for murder. ---
**Author:** ![Mosier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ea924/32.png) [@Mosier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mosier)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2015, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/33 "2015-01-24T04:58:18Z")
Crusader Kings 2 - a Viking king of Norway with 24 martial ability. He’d give the Dragon Age Inquisitor Mage a run for his money, but unless he gets lucky on a couple of spell effect resists, he’s toast. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2015, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/34 "2015-01-24T06:59:01Z")
Squall Leonheart versus The Courier. Uh. Unless the Courier can get in a position to snipe Squall before he notices her, this is a walk. She’s good, but not good enough to stand up against Guardian Forces and paramagic in a standup fight. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2015, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/35 "2015-01-24T07:59:48Z")
Well, my last two are Nisha from Borderlands the pre-sequel, and the Inquisitor/assassin from Dragon age. I gotta go with laser guns and grenades over the Mark on this one. ---
**Author:** ![Critical1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@Critical1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Critical1)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2015, 9:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/36 "2015-01-24T09:13:38Z")
Soldier from TF2 vs Dwarves from Dwarf Fortress…this is a tough call, my Dwarves have zero military skill cause I still havent figured that shit out. 1 v 1 Soldier wins in a walk, but I am playing an entire fortress full of dwarves. 100 + dwarves would certainly be a problem for Soldier boy, he carries 20 rockets but after that its down to a shovel to kill the rest. I could probably at least get some armored up and gear them with better weapons. Not to mention Soldier has to take out the herd of war dogs and the war grizzly out front as well. I think this one goes to the dwarves. Soldier is going to end a lot of shorty lives but the moment he runs out of rockets hes in serious trouble. ---
**Author:** ![eulalia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eulalia/32/457_2.png) [@eulalia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eulalia)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2015, 9:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/37 "2015-01-24T09:25:32Z")
My Diablo 3 Witch Doctor would easily defeat my blood magic and blades user in The Secret World, what with all the pets and jars full of spiders. ---
**Author:** ![Apocalypso](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@Apocalypso](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apocalypso)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2015, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/38 "2015-01-24T14:43:44Z")
A Glitch (robot) character from the\*\* Starbound\*\* unstable, with Dark Knight armor set and corresponding weapons. VS. Questor the Elf from\*\* Gauntlet\*\* (the new one), with, er, no armor and a special bow that you get from signing up to the WB play network or whatever that was. Hmmm. My Starbound character has pretty decent weapons and armor, while Questor has neither. Questor’s “special bow” doesn’t seem to be much different than the regular bow (seriously, I think it does like 1 more damage or something). However, in terms of abilities, Questor is where it’s at. He’s far more agile, can constantly loose a stream of (low dmg) arrows in any direction, has those nasty elf bombs that can clear out all enemies in the vicinity, has sniper shot, bomb shot, and a few nice relics. Conclusion: [Gauntlet voiceover]Glitch, your life force is running out! Glitch is about to die! [/Gauntlet voiceover] ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2015, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/39 "2015-01-25T01:24:05Z")
…And I just realized that the last non-video-game character I played wasn’t my warlock, but a nameless [penguin](http://boardgamegeek.com/boardgame/8203/hey-s-my-fish). A penguin, admittedly, who has demonstrated mad skillz at both monopolizing ice floes and gathering fish, but that’s still even more pathetic than even my warlock. He’d probably stand a pretty good chance against the Don’t Starve character **Kobal2** played, though-- 43 fish will feed you for a good long time. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2015, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679/40 "2015-01-25T04:03:29Z")
In the red corner, standing 2 feet eleven and one half inches tall and weighing in at 47 pounds, Kahbueme, Lvl 100 Frost Mage with Ilvl 642 gear. (My main character in WoW) In the Blue Corner, standing 6 feet four inches tall and weighing in at 295 pounds, the North American Heavyweight Champion, Cowboy Bill Watts. (My avatar in Total Extreme Wrestling 2013) At the bell, Watts charges across the ring only to be impaled by a frost bolt and killed instantly. Referee Jerry Usher didn’t see Kahbueme cast a spell, but is in position to count the fall when the tiny gnome stands on Watts’ chest…1—2---3…winner and new North American Heavyweight Champion…Kahbueme! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-two-game-characters-you-played-as-fight-who-wins/710679.md?page=3)