# The last word **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 28, 2000, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580 "2000-12-28T22:48:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 46
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/901 "2000-12-30T07:22:53Z")
I don’t know about you, Sapphire, but AR and Mauv are too smart for me. I gave up on that word a long time ago. But you go right ahead…I’ll just sit back and enjoy 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/902 "2000-12-30T07:23:07Z")
::shakes head sadly:: I think we’ve lost Sapph. Sure, dear, you have the real one, whatever you say :rolleyes: HA! Not bloodly likely ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/903 "2000-12-30T07:26:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dr.Pinky \* > \*\*You know, I had The Last Word for 3 minutes, give or take 900 posts ago, and it didn’t have a coffee stain on it then. > > I just want everyone to be clear on that point. I am not TLW stainer. \*\* 😃 That’s funny. Sapphie’s has a coffee stain because she has one of the dozens of photocopies I had made during lunch. The Real Last Word is in a secure location known only to Mauv and myself 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![DynoSaur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DynoSaur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DynoSaur)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/904 "2000-12-30T07:27:12Z")
Well, hell…coffee stains are just about the least we have to worry about with this last word… ---
**Author:** ![Sapphire\_Bullet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/96bed5/32.png) [@Sapphire\_Bullet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapphire_Bullet)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/905 "2000-12-30T07:29:12Z")
Pay no attention to AR and Mauv - they **think** they have TLW, but Dyno, Punha and I were able to take it without them noticing…they’ve been duped, but they won;t believe me. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Pinky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/848f3c/32.png) [@Dr.Pinky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Pinky)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/906 "2000-12-30T07:30:50Z")
(For those of you who may not have read this entire opus, DW was the one who took TLW from me back on page one.) [Perry Mason on] Any stains on TLW when it first came into your possesion, Plaything? [Perry Mason off] (I mean MR. WOLF SIR!} ---
**Author:** ![Sapphire\_Bullet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/96bed5/32.png) [@Sapphire\_Bullet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapphire_Bullet)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/907 "2000-12-30T07:32:56Z")
I have always thought that the Perry Mason music sounded like striptease music. And I also thought Paul Drake was sexy. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/908 "2000-12-30T07:36:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sapphire Bullet \* > \*\*Pay no attention to AR and Mauv - they **think** they have TLW, but Dyno, Punha and I were able to take it without them noticing…they’ve been duped, but they won;t believe me. \*\* Oh, please. Dyno and Puntha were so distracted they ere waving around napkins claiming they were the Last Word and you insist that a xerox copy with a coffee stain is the Last Word. 🙂 Denial. An ugly thing ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Pinky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/848f3c/32.png) [@Dr.Pinky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Pinky)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/909 "2000-12-30T07:36:21Z")
Yeah, & I’m still pissed I never even got a dollar tucked in my g-string over at the all male revue thread. I am trying to compensate, obviously, by snatching TLW. ---
**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/910 "2000-12-30T07:36:58Z")
Sapph, Sapph, Sapph, when you will cease in these delusions of yours? I’m really starting to worry now 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/911 "2000-12-30T07:37:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sapphire Bullet \* > \*\*I have always thought that the Perry Mason music sounded like striptease music. > > And I also thought Paul Drake was sexy. 🙂 \*\* Agh! I’ll never be able to watch PM again without seeing some dancer taking it off on the bench! Thanks, Sapphire 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/912 "2000-12-30T07:39:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dr.Pinky \* > \*\*Yeah, & I’m still pissed I never even got a dollar tucked in my g-string over at the all male revue thread. > > I am trying to compensate, obviously, by snatching TLW. \*\* I didn’t visit that thread, Dr.Pinky, but if you care to join me in the Jello pit, I promise to bring a dollar \ ::aside to Arden:: Good thing we scattered all those photocopies about, Good Plan! ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/913 "2000-12-30T07:39:31Z")
I had TLW at one point? Like, 19 pages ago? That’s an eternity, Dr. Pinky. I wish I had taken better care of it when I had it… _Or maybe I did…_ Bwahaha! Is everyone who has an “original” certain of it’s authenticity? Hmmm? ---
**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/914 "2000-12-30T07:41:26Z")
Yes, Wolf, quite certain. Arden and I have the only True originals. We kept stealing it back and forth from one another, but decided that sharing it would be in the best interests of the Last Word. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Pinky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/848f3c/32.png) [@Dr.Pinky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Pinky)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/915 "2000-12-30T07:46:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mauvaise \* > \*\*I didn’t visit that thread, Dr.Pinky, but if you care to join me in the Jello pit, I promise to bring a dollar \ > \*\* Ooh, by popular demand, a repeat performance! (I’ve been practicing.) ::jiggle:: ::jiggle, jiggle:: ::jiggle, jiggle, wobble:: Easy, now. ::jiggle, jiggle, wobble, flail. wobble, wobble, flop, jiggle:: And the grand finale’ ::two off balance hops on the left foot, lead with chin to the jello pit:: Please, no tips. Is there an ER tech in the house? ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/916 "2000-12-30T07:47:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mauvaise \* > \*\*Yes, Wolf, quite certain. Arden and I have the only True originals. We kept stealing it back and forth from one another, but decided that sharing it would be in the best interests of the Last Word. \*\* Because everyone knows only a woman can have The Last Word. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Sapphire\_Bullet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/96bed5/32.png) [@Sapphire\_Bullet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapphire_Bullet)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/917 "2000-12-30T07:48:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Arden\_Ranger \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Sapphire Bullet \* > > \*\*I have always thought that the Perry Mason music sounded like striptease music. > > > > And I also thought Paul Drake was sexy. 🙂 \*\* > > Agh! I’ll never be able to watch PM again without seeing some dancer taking it off on the bench! > > Thanks, Sapphire 🙂 \*\* then my work here is almost done! ---
**Author:** ![Skelji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Skelji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skelji)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/918 "2000-12-30T07:48:36Z")
Amen to that, sister. ---
**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/919 "2000-12-30T07:50:37Z")
::slips a couple dollar bills in Dr.Pinky’s G-string:: Jolly good, show 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Pinky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/848f3c/32.png) [@Dr.Pinky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Pinky)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2000, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580/920 "2000-12-30T07:56:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dire Wolf \* > \*\*Is everyone who has an “original” certain of it’s authenticity? Hmmm? \*\* Hey! My coolest Xmas present this year was Orson Welles “F for Fake”. I have also own a dubious Dali. Don’t come round _here_ talkin’ 'bout the real MacCoy. Here’s the gen-u-ine TLW. I’ve had it certified by a board of Experts. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580.md?page=45) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-last-word/47580.md?page=47)