# The magical killing box **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 4, 2011, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885 "2011-11-04T19:04:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2011, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/21 "2011-11-04T21:41:06Z")
I’d use it. It might be a once in a blue moon thing, and I’d never use it to make them suffer, but there are horrible people that have devoted themselves to preying on innocent people, and the world is better off without them. ---
**Author:** ![Abby\_Emma\_Sasha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e68b1a/32.png) [@Abby\_Emma\_Sasha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abby_Emma_Sasha)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2011, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/22 "2011-11-04T22:09:03Z")
I’d kill Hitler. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2011, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/23 "2011-11-04T22:18:45Z")
> [@Jbone](#): > > [http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-202\_162-20124434/china-2-arrested-over-hit-and-run-toddler/](http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-202_162-20124434/china-2-arrested-over-hit-and-run-toddler/) (video not included - look it up at your own risk) Or don’t. I did, awhile back, and I wish very much that I hadn’t. It’s horrific. I only watched a second or two of the part where the toddler was hit and I had to shut it off. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2011, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/24 "2011-11-04T22:25:41Z")
Does the box only work on people, or could I finally make my dream of finishing off the pandas once and for all come true ? ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2011, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/25 "2011-11-04T22:28:27Z")
> [@Abby\_Emma\_Sasha](#): > > I’d kill Hitler. You know who else killed Hitler ? ! I’d have to get rid of the box. I’ve played enough D&D to know “the person you are thinking of at the time will somehow die.” is far too vague to be a reliable statement. That ‘somehow’ might involve my son knifing the person in a psychotic rage, or them dying in an atomic fireball that destroys Denmark, or something weird. Plus, as atrocious as some actions can be, I have to wonder if evil-doers really believe they’re bad guys. Which leads to me judging others against my own moral principles, which I don’t think I have the right to do. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2011, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/26 "2011-11-04T22:29:22Z")
> [@Jbone](#): > > Suppose someone gave you a magical box with a button on the top, and said that if you push the button, the person you are thinking of at the time will somehow die. The harder you push down on the button, the more gruesome/painful the death will be. There is no reward involved for you other than their death. > > How would you use it? To kill various tyrants who are beyond the law. > [@Jbone](#): > > Could you kill someone without having any information on that person other than something you read about online? In some cases; that’s why I picked tyrants. To use an above example, consider Hitler (if he was still alive naturally); there is an absolutely enormous amount of evidence for the evil he did. With say some guy accused of being a serial killer there might be some chance of mistaken identity, maybe he isn’t the real killer; with a dictator you can be sure. Tyranny leaves too much evidence. And “let the law handle it” isn’t a good tactic when he is the law. And raising a rebellion against him is just as extralegal as me using the box. If one is justified, so is the other; the box just kills fewer people in the process. ---
**Author:** ![FlyByNight512](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/82dd89/32.png) [@FlyByNight512](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FlyByNight512)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2011, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/27 "2011-11-04T22:34:13Z")
Hm. I could see myself investigating some of the real monsters that have gotten out from under a guilty verdict on a technicality. If I can be sure beyond any doubt at all, then I’d press the button. Or possibly the ones that are appealing on a technicality and costing the state millions to do it. But there have been enough people exonerated while on death row that I’d be really, really, really, really cautious about it. It’s not a concern about the morality of killing the person so much as a concern about making sure I’ve got the right one. If I could have a second box that infallibly shows me their guilt or innocence, yeah, I’d be the judge, jury, and executor. I’d set the bar pretty darn high, though. I don’t think I’d push the button for dictators. As evil as they might be personally, a battle for power after their death could be even worse for the country. I might make an exception for Saddam’s sons, though. Fortunately some missiles beat me to it. ---
**Author:** ![Face\_Intentionally\_Left\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/face_intentionally_left_blank/32/288_2.png) [@Face\_Intentionally\_Left\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Face_Intentionally_Left_Blank)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2011, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/28 "2011-11-04T22:36:01Z")
> **[The Button](https://funnyordie.com/2009/10/09/16569/the-button/)** > > Andy presents Mark with a box…and gives him a choice I’m the first? Also, I’ve grown angry and bitter, so I’d totally keep the box. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2011, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/29 "2011-11-04T22:40:00Z")
> [@FatBaldGuy](#): > > I’d make sure it was well and truly destroyed before tossing it in the sea. I agree that the box must be disposed of, but I’d be chary of destroying it. There’s some powerful magic there, and presumably you don’t understand it; bad things may ensue if you smash the box. ---
**Author:** ![Critical1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@Critical1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Critical1)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2011, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/30 "2011-11-05T05:19:30Z")
are you kidding me? keep that box the HELL away from me. unless you want every single religiously driven congressman/senator/governor/president dead. including all of the ones who come next over and over until the only people left running the country are sane that is. man I would so not use the box for anything even close to what the op has in mind. hell it might be tempting to go after that elusive 1% for that matter, at least some of them. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2011, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/31 "2011-11-05T06:45:17Z")
The next person who cuts me off on the highway is DEAD DEAD DEAD! And if a whole line of people standing in the express line at a grocery store with too many items all drop dead at once, well, you’ll know who did it. ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2011, 8:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/32 "2011-11-05T08:30:58Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > Plus, as atrocious as some actions can be, I have to wonder if evil-doers really believe they’re bad guys. Which leads to me judging others against my own moral principles, which I don’t think I have the right to do. Fuck moral relativism. > [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > The next person who cuts me off on the highway is DEAD DEAD DEAD! Oh _sure_, that’s a great idea. Now what are you going to do when you’re stuck behind a car crash, genius? ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2011, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/33 "2011-11-05T16:23:39Z")
I hold off on pressing the button until they’re not in my way, Mr. Doubter. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2011, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/34 "2011-11-05T16:36:26Z")
I’ve got a little list. ---
**Author:** ![Lucretia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/13edae/32.png) [@Lucretia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucretia)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2011, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/35 "2011-11-06T10:53:43Z")
Pssh. Please. I’d so use that box. I wouldn’t even pretend to be conflicted about it, either. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2011, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/36 "2011-11-06T12:45:15Z")
> [@Grumman](#): > > Fuck moral relativism. Yeah. I mean in general, moral relativism isn’t a bad foundation, but there are plenty of cases where it could just be cast aside. For example: child found raped, tortured, mutilated and dead in a ditch. I don’t give a monkey’s fuck if the perpetrator thought they were doing something right. ---
**Author:** ![Mosier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ea924/32.png) [@Mosier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mosier)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2011, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/37 "2011-11-06T14:35:00Z")
It’s a natural urge to want revenge. I’d use the box, and probably end up a comic book bad guy. ---
**Author:** ![Acid\_Lamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Acid\_Lamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acid_Lamp)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2011, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/38 "2011-11-06T15:18:45Z")
Yeah I’d use it. That is too good an opportunity to remove a bunch of people who are really in the way of good progress. If things turn out worse, then I’ll just think of myself and push it to even it up. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2011, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/39 "2011-11-06T16:56:07Z")
> [@Grumman](#): > > Fuck moral relativism. I will not. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2011, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885/40 "2011-11-06T17:27:01Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > What difference does it make? He’d just come back to life again in three days. > > Regards, > Shodan And then the artifact would be the _box of destiny_? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-magical-killing-box/601885.md?page=3)