I can tie a tie. I can tie a bow tie. I can arrange a cravat.
The cool thing is that I do not have to do any of those things, as I do not enjoy doing any of those things. I’m happy.
Somehow, from your posting history I assumed that you’ve ALWAYS posted in your underwear.
…and from your mom’s basement.
I presumed you had some motive in asking other than disinterested scientific inquiry, and my initial thought was that you were implying that informal dress was partially attributable to ignorance or “bad breeding”.
“You say you don’t like yacht racing? Can I ask what university you attended?”
I have no idea if that was your intended implication, but I understood AntiBob’s reaction.
CarnalK, I just noticed that **Bmalion **posed the question about ties, rather than yourself. So, while the substance of my post remains the same, it was misdirected.
It is difficult for me to type, sorry for the misunderstanding.
I was curious. I thought maybe a lot of people don’t like to dress up because they were not taught how when they were kids.
Not from memory, no. Fortunately, for the occasions that require me to wear a tie, I can look up how to do it on the internet.
I’m pretty sure I was shown how to do it multiple times as a kid, but since the occasions requiring the skill were so rare, I never internalized it. Even as an adult I rarely find myself in situations requiring a tie, so I don’t feel the need to memorize how to tie one.
But that’s a silly analogy and shows you are being overly defensive. It’s more like “You say you don’t like yacht racing? Can I ask if you’ve ever been on a yacht?” - though even ramping up comparing wearing a suit to owning a yacht is silly.
Just a post from the girl side. While suits are nice there is nothing more attractive than a man in a t-shirt and jeans.
And ties are dumb.
(However, I can tie one three ways. I taught my husband. I used to tie my dad’s ties for him.)
That’s a common assumption, but I think it’s wrong. Society is changing. Regardless of what our parents feel or felt about the virtues of dressing up, more and more people are rejecting it. I was taught a lot of things by my parents that I have rejected. And this kind of thing is very common in society. How else, for example, would a racist or homophobic society ever change if what your parents taught you was the most important thing?
I’m having trouble understanding how people might not understand why most people prefer to dress casually. When it comes to clothing, there’s a few different criteria people consider. One of them is how other people judge them because of how they look, others include comfort, function, cost, and maintenance. When it comes to dressing up or dressing in style, it simply means that people who do that are more concerned about how others perceive them than those who don’t are. For me, my only real concern with others in my clothing is that, at work, I’m not distracting or offensive. If someone is going to judge my competence based upon my clothing, they’re a moron because my competence is based on my work not my appearance, and thus I don’t care what they think.
I dress up for occasions when it is important. I’ll dress up for a wedding or a job interview, or something else that specifically has a dress code, but that’s about it. Hell, when I get married, I hope to have a pretty casual dress code precisely for this whole reason.
So, apparently, I was right the first time.
It WAS a suggestion that a dislike of playing dress up was due to inability and not to choice. It suggests that people actually DO like playing dress up and simply don’t because (for whatever reason), they can’t. It rejects the possibility that people might actually not prefer it.
And that’s still condescending as hell, whether you admit it or not.
If that makes me a jackass, I’ll proudly own up to it.
Do I regularly wear suit and tie for work? Yes. But if other people don’t, that’s their choice, and I’m not going to be the pretentious jackass that suggests it’s due to embarrassment of inability, rather than a real, earnest choice.
But you will be the pretentious jackass who unloads on someone who’s genuinely curious about why other people don’t like dressing up?
I like dressing up, but I don’t really have a problem with people who don’t. The exceptions are weddings and funerals; you can make the effort, because it’s not about you.
I have lots. Feel free to borrow (for real). Though I hope nobody you know dies.
It shows no such thing and the fact you think it does shows your mother made you wear short pants till you were 19. But that’s neither here nor there.
Yeah, I guess I ended being being that ass. I’ll bite that bullet.
My original response wasn’t even that bad. But I am sorry that the spat between CarnalK and me got out of hand.
I’m actually genuinely curious about what exactly in that first post was “unloading” on anybody. It was a pithy, sarcastic response to a remarkably clueless question. So, if anybody can clue me in, much appreciation. No need on the subsequent posts - I get where those were inflammatory.
So you think “sticks up your condescending, pretentious asses” is pithy? May I ask what University you attended?
I’ve tried posting while wearing clothes as opposed to just wearing my underwear. It’s just not the same.
In the interests of oversharing, I feel compelled to disclose that I’m wearing a pair of hot pink women’s boxer-briefs. And a pair of glasses.
Yes I can. My father, who loved dressing for formal occasions, offered to teach me all kinds of exotic ways to tie a necktie. I declined. When he died, I inherited two tuxedos. One is a standard tux. The other has a satin jacket that is black and bright blue. I also inherited a bunch of cuff links, tie pins, and tie clips.
If I wanted to learn all kinds of exotic knots, I’m positive there are plenty of websites that could teach me. Anybody who can read your post has the same resources available to them. It isn’t that we don’t know how. It is that we choose not to.
Even before the internet, there were any number of books and pamphlets which showed how to tie a tie.
My thoughts skew in the opposite direction.
If I see someone that is wearing a suit (to a function that does not require a suit), I’m thinking that person doesn’t have the confidence in themselves. They are overcompensating for their lack of confidence by putting on extra nice packaging.
Looking like a slob is the opposite problem. That is screaming “I am so amazing, I don’t have to conform to your GQ reality.” In most cases the confidence is completely misplaced, but unearned confidence is confidence none the less".