# The Melania movie reviews are in! (they're not good) **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** movies\ **Created:** [January 31, 2026, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227 "2026-01-31T15:30:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 16
**Author:** ![scabpicker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scabpicker/32/8268_2.png) [@scabpicker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scabpicker)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2026, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/301 "2026-03-12T03:08:42Z")
Heheh, ok. I admit I’d watch the MST3K version. ---
**Author:** ![Author\_Balk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Author\_Balk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Author_Balk)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2026, 10:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/302 "2026-03-12T10:20:59Z")
According to this it’s the most watched movie. It’s second overall. Young Sherlock, a TV series, is number 1 overall. > **[TOP 10 on Amazon Prime in the United States on March 11, 2026 • FlixPatrol](https://flixpatrol.com/top10/amazon-prime/united-states/)** > > The most popular movies and TV shows on Amazon Prime in United States. Who was #1 on Amazon Prime on March 11, 2026? TOP 10 charts or full ratings charts. Check the title detail for more streaming… ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2026, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/303 "2026-03-12T10:34:43Z")
> [@Author\_Balk](#): > > According to this it’s the most watched movie. Sounds like bullshit to me. Here are the top 30 movies according to the reputable site Rotten Tomatoes – _Melania_ is not there, and probably wouldn’t even be in the top 1000. Any screenings/purchases it has aside from Trumpists would likely be from those creating an MST3K parody. > **[30 Most Popular Movies Right Now: What to Watch In Theaters and Streaming](https://editorial.rottentomatoes.com/guide/popular-movies/)** > > See what films are buzzing with RT users this week! ---
**Author:** ![Author\_Balk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Author\_Balk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Author_Balk)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2026, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/304 "2026-03-12T12:04:01Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > A couple days ago there was a thing when I started Prime advertising the movie with a comment that it was number 1. (at least it said it was). I clicked on the “not for me” thing so I don’t think I will see it again. But… if there were 10 percent of the people who really wanted to see the movie and the other 90 percent were spread out among other movies, I could see how it could be number 1. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2026, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/305 "2026-03-12T14:56:01Z")
Yet another case where I’m glad to have never signed up for Amazon Prime. And y’know I wouldn’t put it past Bezos to at some point just push-deliver it to everyone a-la Apple & U2. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2026, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/306 "2026-03-12T15:14:24Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > a-la Apple & U2. Oh yeah. I had to find the “hack” to get it off my itunes. If I had a cornfield, I would have sent it there. Bezos could put it one the splash screen of Prime and I’ll “blindspot” it. Unless he ties me down and clamps my eyelids open, I’ll never watch even the trailer. ---
**Author:** ![bobsmom101](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobsmom101/32/2867_2.png) [@bobsmom101](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobsmom101)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2026, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/307 "2026-03-12T15:54:50Z")
I just got a reminder from Jeffy that my Prime membership renews next month. I think it’s finally time to cancel & let him know why. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2026, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/308 "2026-03-12T16:55:36Z")
FlixPatrol, which operates out of the Czech Republic and only has two employees at last count, is ranked 1166th out of 1578 active competitors. [FlixPatrol - 2026 Company Profile, Team & Competitors - Tracxn](https://tracxn.com/d/companies/flixpatrol/__NdUWBh3IfO1dwn80xzPr0f-kf14uW4jG1Jxm9hRm1OY#about-the-company) ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2026, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/309 "2026-03-18T21:08:40Z")
> [@BobLibDem](#): > > The only way I would watch it would be if I knew that somewhere in the movie she utters the phrase “moose and squirrel” and even then I’d only watch that clip on YouTube. Jesus, we need “like” buttons. ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2026, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/310 "2026-03-30T17:09:02Z")
When the makers of documentaries want their product to be consumed, isn’t it the usual practice to release little scenes to tempt? Leave the viewer wanting more? What’s to be made of the repeated scene where she’s talking on the phone to trump, congratulating “Meester President” for something that was apparently televised. Then she admits she didn’t watch it! WTF? That’s a highlight? ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2026, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/311 "2026-03-30T20:29:50Z")
It’s demonstrating the ideal technique when dealing with your feudal lord: praise him obsequiously even if you don’t know what for. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2026, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/312 "2026-03-31T03:24:33Z")
I’ve never had Amazon Prime, not even when I was a 3rd party Amazon vendor. When I got my first TiVo, in the late 00s, it appeared to have been a used, refurbished unit, and it was auto-programmed to record anything even remotely associated with the Kardashians. I had to call customer service to get that changed! One wonders if that may account for some of their high ratings, at the time. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/22080_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2026, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/313 "2026-03-31T13:01:40Z")
I have Prime and while I like to watch documentaries, I never once clicked on this idiotic waste of my time. Yet in the last few days, I discovered it would show on my “continue watching” list. Was my account manipulated by Amazon to make it seem like I watched that dreck? Is that how it got a #2 “rating” on Prime? I feel like I have to have my TV exorcised. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2026, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/314 "2026-04-10T03:16:50Z")
Maybe there’ll be a Director’s Cut now: [Melania Trump denies knowing Epstein in rare public statement : NPR](https://www.npr.org/2026/04/09/nx-s1-5779783/melania-trump-jeffrey-epstein) Or… not. ---
**Author:** ![Chad\_Sudan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chad_sudan/32/4509_2.png) [@Chad\_Sudan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chad_Sudan)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2026, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/315 "2026-04-10T19:21:48Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#): > > Maybe there’ll be a Director’s Cut now Or _ **Melania 2: Epstein Boogaloo** _ ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2026, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/316 "2026-04-10T20:17:11Z")
**Melania 2: Back to the Minors** ---
**Author:** ![SunUp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@SunUp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SunUp)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2026, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227/317 "2026-04-10T23:53:37Z")
Love the double entendre! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-melania-movie-reviews-are-in-theyre-not-good/1027227.md?page=15)