Is your Pa’s name Barry? (Or is that Redmond?)
I don’t get it.
There is a difference between badass and savage.
Argent, I have to be honest, your father doesn’t sound like anyone to idolize. I have to question why you’re loyal to your father so much but you don’t say anything that sounds like you give a shit about your mom when your dad was… well, I’ve been reprimanded twice now for what I’ve said to/about people so I’ll stop here. Honestly, what I want to say about your dad would get me in trouble. And since you like him so much, what I feel about you as well.
Maybe Argent Towers is doing one of those Andy Kaufman things in presenting this story in the thread, challenging us to examine in ourselves “what is badass?”
When I was about nine years old I got beat up by some bullies who were probably in the 7th or 8th grade. I came home with a swollen eye and busted lip. My Dad was home and took one look at me and said "What the fuck (first and only time I ever heard the old man say that word) Happened to you? I told him and he said Get in the car.
By the time we got to where the beating took place There were more kids and one of them happened to be the older brother of the kid who popped my eye (A 11th grader who was taller than my Dad by at least 6 inches) Dad got out of the car and was giving the bullies a speech about picking on kids smaller than themselves and how ashamed they should be.
Mr. 11th grader taps Dad on the shoulder and tells him to mind his own fucking business and that he should teach his kid how to fight and he wouldn’t get his ass kicked so much. My Dads inner Wolverine was released and he had the kid by the throat and up against the wall.
Don’t you ever touch me again or I’ll break your neck. When Dad lets the kid go The kid says You’ll be having a talk with my father. To which my Dad says…I’ll break your fathers neck too.
Needless to say Dad never had a talk with Mr 11th graders father. And I was never picked on by those guys again.
The whole story is a joke. It didn’t really happen.
At least, even if it did happen I presume AT doesn’t actually think beating up a 15-year-old boy is “badass”.
Speaking of dogs and moms who think their kids are threatened, I went to the post office one afternoon to drop off a package when I was 19. My mom was lounging around at home not doing anything, so I suggested we walk to the post office, mail my package, and then go have lunch together. While walking there we walked passed somebody’s yard and his dog went nuts with the barking and the snarling. Again, five years or so after the incident with the guy in our car, mom jumped in front of me and put her arm across my chest and told me to get back. Nevermind the fact that I was already a foot taller and at least 20 pounds heavier than she was, I had a heavy box in my hands that I could throw at an attacking dog while she had nothing, was 19, and the dog was fenced into the yard. “Get your baby behind you” must be hard-wired into the brains of every mother.
A dude I worked with when I was in High School. This guy made Hulk Hogan look like some couch potato. He wasn’t as tall but you could see every muscle ripple as he moved. He was also one of those super-gentle types. If someone tried starting something with him, he would put a snake-grab on their belt and basically curl them ---- and then hold them there with their feet off the ground and their balls getting crushed and calmly explain to them that picking a fight with strangers really isn’t a good idea because that stranger could be a lot faster and stronger than they were. He would then gently set them down and turn his back. I can picture him now looking up with these calm eyes while some yahoo looked back all bug-eyed. Saw him give that lecture a few times and only once did someone try to figure out of he was being honest - he was.
The story is taken directly from Barry Lyndon. I guess nobody got it except friedo.
Thanks for the explanation. It is irritating to read something like that and not know if the post is true.
The unfortunate part is that people won’t read this far in the thread, and will think your dad really did that. 
Dude, I saw Barry Lyndon, like, 30 years ago and no, I don’t remember that scene; sorry. And your point was…?
I love this thread ALOT.
My very brief bout of BadAssness.
It was in the fall of my Sophomore year of high school. I had returned from a summer out of state visiting family a changed person. Gone were my braces and dorktastic spazlooks (home perms should be outlawed), replaced by longer hair and a tan that George Hamilton would envy. my hyperpigmentation, let me show you it.
For the first time in my pathetic school life, GUYS noticed me. ALOT. The attention was nice at first, then I realized they were still the same wankers they always were. (And I was the same wankette that I always was, only without braces or frizzy hair.)
So, there I was in the hallway by my locker and a couple of boys decide to lift up my uniform skirt. It was possibly the only time in my entire Catholic School career that I didn’t wear shorts under my skirt because of the fear of I see London, I see France gag that never failed to amuse the sheep.
Mortified that someone other than my mother was seeing my granny panties, I spun holding my skirt down and gave a short lived " Cut that out you weiner" ( or other foul invective appropriate at the time.) I have since made up for my lack of proper public heathen edumacation since then with goodspeed and due diligence.
Dickhead A, my own personal Moriarity for a couple of years, started tickling me. His buddies stood there laughing and watching. I grew up around boys. Had brothers. I was the only girl in a neighborhood of cootie filled boys. I know how boys think and act. Probably better than a girl at that time.
Holy fuckin’ hell, I hated being tickled. Still do.It was, to me, something akin to being raped publicly. I grabbed the front of his white shirt, pulled him towards and down with me as I went backwards and rolled him onto his back, pinning him to the floor with my knees on his shoulders and said something probably profound like, “You’re such a retard!!!1111”
I was possibly 95 pounds.
I got up and the guys parted like the Red Sea.
That was my badass moment, and I did it wearing a Catholic School Girl Uniform.
( I lost all you horn dogs at *Catholic School girl *and pinning his shoulders with my knees, didn’t I? )
I’ll be in my bunk.
Pics, or it never happened!
No time to reach bunk. I’ll be under desk.
The most badass thing I have ever seen was a right-place-right-time moment for me.
I was sitting with my wife in a parking lot in the middle of the day waiting for Jiffy Lube to finish up our oil change. All of a sudden, we hear quickly approaching footsteps from somewhere behind us. We turn to see a man with his hands cuffed behind his back running away from the nearby police station. The man bolts right past us and hurdles a not-small concrete drainage ditch nearby (an impressive feat to say the least, but he’s the bad guy here, so screw him). He continues into a busy intersection where traffic is blaring to a stop to avoid hitting him. About this time, we hear another sound coming from somewhere behind us. We turn to see a middle-aged bicycle cop peddling quickly in our direction. We move out of the way and he jumps over the ditch on his bike.
As an engineer, I took several physics classes in my day and I still have no idea how he managed to jump a bike over a ditch that size.
Anyway, after clearing the ditch, he speeds after the fleeing suspect in the middle of the intersection. He then performed an maneuver that continues to secure his place in my “Ultimate Badass” competition. As he approached the suspect, he slammed on the bike’s brakes and flew OVER THE HANDLEBARS and tackled him in one motion.
Aside: I had the pleasure of meeting the man at a fund raiser for the humane society a year or so later. I gushed like a schoolgirl.
Yeah, when I first told Mr. Ujest this story, he got all dreamy-like. When I’ve shared it with Man-Friends, they go all dreamy-like.
Who knew that being a Catholic School Girl was a superpower in itself?
Britney Spears.
Aron Ralston comes to mind when I think of the most bad-ass people of all time.
From Wikipedia:
*While he was on a canyoneering trip in Blue John Canyon (near Moab, Utah), a boulder dislodged, crushing his right forearm and pinning it against the canyon wall. Ralston had not told anyone of his hiking plans and knew no one would be searching for him. Assuming that he would die, he spent five days slowly sipping his small amount of remaining water while trying to extricate his arm. He eventually ran out of water and began to drink his own urine, carved his name, date of birth and presumed date of death into the sandstone canyon wall, and videotaped his last goodbyes to his family.
After five days of trying to lift and break the boulder, a dehydrated and delirious Ralston prepared to cut off his already-dead arm by levering it against a chockstone, which snapped the radius and ulna bones. Using the dull blade on his multiuse tool, he cut the soft tissue around the break. He then used the tool’s pliers to tear at the tougher tendons. Although he never named the make of the tool other than to say it was not Leatherman, he did describe it as “what you’d get if you bought a $15 flashlight and got a free multi-use tool”.[1] After freeing himself, he was still eight miles from his stick shift truck, and he had no cellular phone. He had to rappel down a 65-foot sheer wall, then hike out of the canyon in the hot midday sun. While hiking out, he encountered a family of three on vacation from the Netherlands who gave him water and all the food that they had. They then alerted the authorities. He was ultimately rescued by a helicopter search team. His arm was retrieved by park authorities and removed from under the boulder. It was cremated and given to Ralston. He returned to the boulder and left the ashes there.*
Seriously, this guy is unstoppable.