# The Most Metal Deaths in Middle Earth **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 30, 2015, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873 "2015-06-30T15:56:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Deeg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/deeg/32/2955_2.png) [@Deeg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deeg)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/41 "2015-08-31T21:43:02Z")
> [@dracoi](#): > > Had she whipped off the helmet and made a speech before the fight, she’d probably have scored extra points. 🙂 In the books she does exactly that. It is one of the nigh-unforgivable sins that PJ committed when he made the movies. Eowyn from the books is more metal. ---
**Author:** ![Deeg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/deeg/32/2955_2.png) [@Deeg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deeg)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/42 "2015-08-31T21:44:34Z")
> [@thelurkinghorror](#): > > Rohirrim are basically pre-Norman Anglo-Saxons, who were the second most metal people on earth after Vikings. Genghis Khan and his Huns would like to have a word with you. I suggest you politely (very politely!) decline. ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/43 "2015-08-31T21:50:54Z")
> [@Deeg](#): > > In the books she does exactly that. It is one of the nigh-unforgivable sins that PJ committed when he made the movies. Eowyn from the books is more metal. > [@Eowyn](#): > > “But no living man am I! You are looking upon a woman. Eowyn am I, Eomund’s daughter. You stand between me and my lord and kin. Begone, if you be not deathless! For living or dark undead, I will smite you, if you touch him.” Metal as fuck. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/44 "2015-08-31T22:24:18Z")
They disqualified the most metal last stand in all of Middle Earth due to the petty technicality that he didn’t actually die. The scene? Hurin’s final fight in Nirnaeth Arnoedd: > [@](#): > > _Last of all Húrin stood alone. Then he cast aside his shield, and wielded an axe two-handed; and it is sung that the axe smoked in the black blood of the troll-guard of Gothmog until it withered, and each time that he slew Húrin cried: ‘Aurë entuluva! Day shall come again!’ Seventy times he uttered that cry; but they took him at last alive, by the command of Morgoth, for the Orcs grappled him with their hands, which clung to him still though he hewed off their arms; and ever their numbers were renewed, until at last he fell buried beneath them._ To reiterate, Hurin - canonically the greatest human warrior, ever - killed \*trolls \*until his axe _melted in their blood_, and then kept on chopping 'til he was buried alive beneath _the severed arms of his enemies_. There is nothing more metal than that. Nothing. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/45 "2015-08-31T23:59:46Z")
> [@Deeg](#): > > Genghis Khan and his Huns would like to have a word with you. I suggest you politely (very politely!) decline. Genghis Khan was a Mongol. Attila was a (the) Hun. ---
**Author:** ![dracoi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@dracoi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dracoi)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/46 "2015-09-01T00:49:53Z")
> [@Deeg](#): > > In the books she does exactly that. It is one of the nigh-unforgivable sins that PJ committed when he made the movies. Eowyn from the books is more metal. I’ll have to check the timing of it, but I don’t think she does that at the beginning of the fight, even in the novels. Which is OK, I guess, but it hardly compares to standing outside the gates and taunting him until he’s forced to come out and fight with you. ---
**Author:** ![Grey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b782af/32.png) [@Grey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grey)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/47 "2015-09-01T01:49:05Z")
> [@dracoi](#): > > I’ll have to check the timing of it, but I don’t think she does that at the beginning of the fight, even in the novels. > > Which is OK, I guess, but it hardly compares to standing outside the gates and taunting him until he’s forced to come out and fight with you. Fingolfin faced Morgoth while Eowen stared down a ringwraith. ---
**Author:** ![scabpicker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scabpicker/32/8268_2.png) [@scabpicker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scabpicker)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/48 "2015-09-01T03:05:59Z")
> [@GargoyleWB](#): > > Physicists have noted that when JRR Tolkien concluded his epic with the publishing of Return of the King in 1955 in England, Angus Young was simultaneously born at the antipodal point in Australia, confirming earlier predictions of the Conservation of Metal theory. Which is even more impressive once you consider that Angus’ mother was in Scotland at the time. ---
**Author:** ![Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blue_blistering_barnacle/32/3386_2.png) [@Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blue_Blistering_Barnacle)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/49 "2015-09-01T04:32:44Z")
> [@dracoi](#): > > I’ll have to check the timing of it, but I don’t think she does that at the beginning of the fight, even in the novels. > > Which is OK, I guess, but it hardly compares to standing outside the gates and taunting him until he’s forced to come out and fight with you. > [@Grey](#): > > Fingolfin faced Morgoth while Eowen stared down a ringwraith. Still, metal as hell for a mortal human in the third age. Aragorn is but a mewling puker, Legolas a hairdresser, and Gimli a representative of the Lollipop Gang before her. Perhaps I overstate. Still, she doesn’t have to beat #1 Fingolfin to deserve a spot on the list. Also, her battle would make a cooler (or at least hotter) metal album cover. ---
**Author:** ![Deeg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/deeg/32/2955_2.png) [@Deeg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deeg)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/50 "2015-09-01T04:46:47Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > Genghis Khan was a Mongol. Attila was a (the) Hun. Oops, you’re right. I knew that, too. Don’t tell Genghis. ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/51 "2015-09-01T05:05:24Z")
> [@Deeg](#): > > Genghis Khan and his Huns would like to have a word with you. I suggest you politely (very politely!) decline. Yeah? Do they have an entire genre [named after them](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viking_metal) (Mongols or Huns)? I don’t know if Anglo-Saxon metal is a thing, unless you mean some [creepy racist stuff](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/National_Socialist_black_metal). Or maybe [Saxon](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saxon_%28band%29) counts. ---
**Author:** ![Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ac8455/32.png) [@Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Your_Great_Darsh_Face)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/52 "2015-09-01T06:30:17Z")
> [@Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](#): > > Still, metal as hell for a mortal human in the third age. Aragorn is but a mewling puker, Legolas a hairdresser, and Gimli a representative of the Lollipop Gang before her. Perhaps I overstate. Still, she doesn’t have to beat #1 Fingolfin to deserve a spot on the list. Also, her battle would make a cooler (or at least hotter) metal album cover. To give Gimli his due though, at Helm’s Deep he killed so many orcs in one fight that his axe needed mending afterwards: > [@Gimli](#): > > Alas, my axe is notched: the last had an iron collar on his neck And also to give Eowyn her due, the Lord of the Nazgul was so badass that any weapon that hit him would break. Even Merry’s Barrow-blade withered away like a burning stick, and that was a specially enchanted anti-Ringwraith weapon. ---
**Author:** ![GargoyleWB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gargoylewb/32/199_2.png) [@GargoyleWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GargoyleWB)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/53 "2015-09-01T15:11:31Z")
> [@scabpicker](#): > > Which is even more impressive once you consider that Angus’ mother was in Scotland at the time. I…er…damn. Thought I had something there, back to the lab! _gathers research papers and runs off down the hall_ ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/54 "2015-09-01T18:11:04Z")
Hey, there’s a difference between the most Metal Deeds in Middle Earth, and the most Metal Deaths in Middle Earth. Killing the Lord of the Nazgul is an epic metal deed, but since Eowyn didn’t die while doing it, she’s disqualified from the thread. I mean, she recovered from her wounds and settled down with Faramir and lived to a ripe old age surrounded by children and grandchildren. That’s a non-metal death. ---
**Author:** ![Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blue_blistering_barnacle/32/3386_2.png) [@Blue\_Blistering\_Barnacle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blue_Blistering_Barnacle)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/55 "2015-09-01T21:29:34Z")
Fair point. …walks away muttering, “Luthien died the same way…” ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/56 "2015-09-02T03:45:16Z")
Well, yeah, the second time. ---
**Author:** ![Tatterdemalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/43a26b/32.png) [@Tatterdemalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tatterdemalion)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/57 "2015-09-02T19:01:53Z")
I keep getting this image in my head of Professor Tolkein sitting around a table in Valhalla, or wherever fictional heroes go to talk with their authors, along with some of the characters that have been discussed in this thread. And one of them is saying, “You lived through the battle of the Somme? Now that’s freaking metal!” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/58 "2015-09-02T19:35:14Z")
Damn straight. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873/59 "2015-09-02T19:40:43Z")
Some great Tolkien-related T-shirts and hoodies availabe from [Redbubble.com](http://Redbubble.com), incidentally (spoilered so as not to take up too much room here). [http://www.redbubble.com/people/ladysekishi/works/11643302-the-hobbit-lonely-mountain-light?grid\_pos=7&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/ladysekishi/works/11643302-the-hobbit-lonely-mountain-light?grid_pos=7&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/daerana/works/8325673-tolkien-symbol?grid\_pos=65&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/daerana/works/8325673-tolkien-symbol?grid_pos=65&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/suzannexp/works/12484815-the-hobbit?grid\_pos=60&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/suzannexp/works/12484815-the-hobbit?grid_pos=60&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/mehmetikberker/works/9731708-middle-earth-transit-map?grid\_pos=10&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/mehmetikberker/works/9731708-middle-earth-transit-map?grid_pos=10&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/viggosaurus/works/11384934-not-all-those-who-wander?grid\_pos=43&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/viggosaurus/works/11384934-not-all-those-who-wander?grid_pos=43&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/audreyhelladope/works/12187201-white-tree-of-gondor?grid\_pos=83&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/audreyhelladope/works/12187201-white-tree-of-gondor?grid_pos=83&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/shirelocked/works/10812029-mines-of-moria?grid\_pos=91&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/shirelocked/works/10812029-mines-of-moria?grid_pos=91&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/zapdosman/works/10268260-what-about-second-breakfast?grid\_pos=115&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/zapdosman/works/10268260-what-about-second-breakfast?grid_pos=115&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/anglofile/works/8078288-welcome-to-mordor?grid\_pos=187&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/anglofile/works/8078288-welcome-to-mordor?grid_pos=187&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/trumanpalmehn/works/11598143-watercolour-smaug?grid\_pos=76&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/trumanpalmehn/works/11598143-watercolour-smaug?grid_pos=76&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/thranduart/works/12542797-elfie?grid\_pos=59&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/thranduart/works/12542797-elfie?grid_pos=59&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/loveaj/works/6878172-i-survived-helms-deep?grid\_pos=17&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/loveaj/works/6878172-i-survived-helms-deep?grid_pos=17&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/the-void/works/11445514-smaugs-daily-affirmations?grid\_pos=23&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/the-void/works/11445514-smaugs-daily-affirmations?grid_pos=23&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/shadyeldarwen/works/11835959-too-many-arrows-not-enough-orcs?grid\_pos=31&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/shadyeldarwen/works/11835959-too-many-arrows-not-enough-orcs?grid_pos=31&p=t-shirt) [http://www.redbubble.com/people/anglofile/works/8077587-thats-what-im-tolkien-about?grid\_pos=2&p=t-shirt](http://www.redbubble.com/people/anglofile/works/8077587-thats-what-im-tolkien-about?grid_pos=2&p=t-shirt) …and many more. Search “Tolkien” (or any other fandom you prefer; lots of cool stuff there). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-metal-deaths-in-middle-earth/723873.md?page=2)