# The most recent Unwatchable Movies **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 10, 2009, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916 "2009-03-10T04:06:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2009, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/41 "2009-03-11T18:17:05Z")
> [@Kyla](#): > > The Transformers movie from 2007. Jesus christ. I like the occasional blowing things up movie, and my friends wanted to go, so I was all, “whatever, okay.” Boy howdy was that a waste of 12 leva. I think that movie actually made me stupider. But it had John Turturro! Every time John Turturro is on screen, you can’t help but think, “Am I really seeing this John Turturro performance in this movie about giant robots punching each other?” He adds that special John Turturro feeling to a movie that doesn’t deserve that special John Turturro feeling. ---
**Author:** ![WreckingCrew](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wreckingcrew/32/4080_2.png) [@WreckingCrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WreckingCrew)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2009, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/42 "2009-03-11T19:46:37Z")
> [@Runestar](#): > > _Minority Report_ - the closest I’ve ever come to walking out on a movie. Stupid plot plus scenes included just because someone wanted to up the ‘ick’ factor (_Hey, let’s have Tom Cruise’s character accidentally eat the moldy sandwich instead of the good one_) I saw this in Mexico. English sound track with Spanish subtitles and the traditional intermission that fell right in the middle of a chase sceen. None of which helped a dopey movie. ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2009, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/43 "2009-03-11T23:15:36Z")
**The Secret Life Of Bees** It should’ve been a Lifetime or Oxygen movie. NOT a theater movie which gave me the false sense that it was worth both my time and money. ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/44 "2009-03-12T02:02:09Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > He adds that special John Turturro feeling to a movie that doesn’t deserve that special John Turturro feeling. The most over the top John Turturro feeling in the history of John Turturro feelings :p. I gotta soft spot for that movie, because…well…giant robots punching each other. On the other hand it _is_ kinda awful. But on the gripping hand John Turturro is so flat-out insane in that role that even those who despise giant-robot-punching-films should still be able to eke out a modicum of guilty, cheesey pleasure. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/45 "2009-03-12T02:09:14Z")
> [@Kyla](#): > > The Transformers movie from 2007. Jesus christ. I like the occasional blowing things up movie, and my friends wanted to go, so I was all, “whatever, okay.” Boy howdy was that a waste of 12 leva. I think that movie actually made me stupider. My brother in law described it as “Just like a French farcical comedy. But with giant robots beating each other up.” ---
**Author:** ![kath94](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/67e7ee/32.png) [@kath94](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kath94)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/46 "2009-03-12T05:51:37Z")
> [@elfkin477](#): > > Yeah, [me too](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=10912471&postcount=5). I have to agree. There was SO much hype about it. I actually fell asleep watching it. Now, “Batman Returns,” – was that the first one with Christian Bale? I totally enjoyed that one. ---
**Author:** ![Omgalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/41988e/32.png) [@Omgalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omgalion)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/47 "2009-03-12T06:24:34Z")
**War, Inc** was just terrible. I still can’t believe I sat through the whole thing. ---
**Author:** ![emarkp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3be4f8/32.png) [@emarkp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emarkp)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 7:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/48 "2009-03-12T07:02:33Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > It’s well established in the movie that the super-assassins have magic powers that let them bend bullets around obstacles. If you don’t accept the premise that their magic powers let them do magic like curve bullets around obstacles then yeah, it’s a bit unrealistic, because to curve bullets around obstacles would require the suspension of the laws of physics. > > I thought Wanted was watchable, and the filmmakers clearly understood they were making something ludicrous and derivative. Indeed, it seems like it’s the Matrix \* Star Wars, complete with Jedi powers, father issues, Sith defections, etc. Both of those movies were pretty derivative as well. But at least were stories presented well. Now Equilibrium, on the other hand… ---
**Author:** ![Anomie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4491bb/32.png) [@Anomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anomie)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/49 "2009-03-12T07:15:40Z")
> [@Morbo](#): > > **Redbelt**. Not even the presence of Chiwetel Ejiofor could save it. > > Let’s put it this way. When Mamet’s good, you notice him, but don’t care so much. > > When he’s bad? Let me tell you when he’s bad. I’m telling you fucking when. I’m about to fucking tell you. When he’s bad. That’s what I’m about to fucking tell you. Maybe in the next sentence. When he’s fucking bad, you notice he’s fucking bad. It’s the fucking bad you notice. The noticeable fucking bad. That’s when he’s bad. Now everyone give it up for the stylistic line readings of Ricky Jay and Rebecca Pidgeon. Yes. I love Mamet, (Spartan was vastly superior to any Bond or Bourne), but Redbelt got a big WTF from me, too. It wasn’t just the dialogue either, I spent the second half of the film waiting for the big reveal… and I am still am. ---
**Author:** ![Anomie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4491bb/32.png) [@Anomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anomie)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/50 "2009-03-12T07:37:00Z")
[Waking Life (2001)](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Waking_Life) It is to film, what Charlene’s “I’ve Never Been to Me” is to music. In my catalogue of movies it is the soul entry in the genre of ''wankfest". I can’t be around people who liked that film. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/51 "2009-03-12T07:46:06Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > A customer came in one evening, and asked for a refund for _Witless Protection_, because it wasn’t funny. I said, “It’s a Larry the Cable Guy movie.” He said, “So?” I said, “_It’s a Larry the Cable Guy movie_.” He said “You just lost a customer.” I was like, “Uh, not a customer I really wanna keep.” I’m not trying to pit you, I am really just curious. Is it your store? Is it your call to make? If you don’t want customers like that why do you have Larry the Cable Guy movies on the shelf? ---
**Author:** ![Mosier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ea924/32.png) [@Mosier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mosier)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/52 "2009-03-12T08:10:12Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > I’m not trying to pit you, I am really just curious. Is it your store? Is it your call to make? If you don’t want customers like that why do you have Larry the Cable Guy movies on the shelf? I think the point was that he doesn’t want customers who will rent obviously shitty movies and then demand their money back. He doesn’t have a problem with people who rent obviously shitty moves and don’t demand their money back. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 8:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/53 "2009-03-12T08:36:27Z")
> [@Mosier](#): > > I think the point was that he doesn’t want customers who will rent obviously shitty movies and then demand their money back. He doesn’t have a problem with people who rent obviously shitty moves and don’t demand their money back. Hard to tell. I guess it depends on what part of the conversation was outloud and which part was in his head. Not a big deal. I was in retail a long time ago. Lots of shitty customers. I know management did not want me picking which ones to try to retain. I’m trying to think of something that fits the OP. I have a pretty good filter. I can usually pick out which movies I will find unwatchable and then not watch them. Probably _Meet the Spartans_ I knew it was going to suck but I was kind of a captive audience. I was right, it did suck. ---
**Author:** ![wintertime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c68b51/32.png) [@wintertime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wintertime)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/54 "2009-03-12T11:00:57Z")
I agree with every derisive remark said about “Wanted” and “Transformers”. “The Dark Knight” wasn’t great but I wouldn’t call it unwatchable – just un_re_watchable. I add “[Death Proof](http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/death_proof/)”, “[The Invasion](http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/invasion/)” and “[Shoot em Up](http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/shoot_em_up/)”. I avoided all of them at the cinema but watched them later on DVD, partly. Bored now. Others, like “[300](http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/300/)”, I won’t even try. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2009, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916/55 "2009-03-12T12:17:27Z")
> [@ellere](#): > > **War, Inc** was just terrible. I still can’t believe I sat through the whole thing. Yes, and it had John Cusack and Marisa Tomei in, two people I normally like. Even Hillary Duff was hotter than I expected. But \*still \*unwatchable. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-most-recent-unwatchable-movies/488916.md?page=2)