# The movie whose ending sucketh biggest.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058>\
**Category:** Cafe Society\
**Created:** [January 15, 2006, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058 "2006-01-15T06:47:18Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/21 "2006-01-15T18:59:22Z")

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> [@TellMeI'mNotCrazy](#):
>
> As is also the case with Stephen King’s The Stand, btw.

The Superflu caused so much pain, oh!  
And with evil a raging volcano  
Flagg’s triumph seemed certain  
Until King rang the curtain  
By pulling a _Deus ex ano!_ :rolleyes:

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**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/22 "2006-01-15T19:01:40Z")

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> [@Tuckerfan](#):
>
> _Lord of War_. In the film, Cage’s character becomes a gun runner in order to get rich so he can win the girl of his dreams. He manages to not only win her, but becomes wealthy enough that he doesn’t have to sell guns anymore. He doesn’t give up selling guns, even though his wife leaves him. Then he gets busted for it, is set free, and goes back to running guns. At the very end, there’s a blurb saying that the US is one of the leading exporters of weapons in the world, and that the film is kind of, sorta, based on real people, but not really.

That’s depressing, but why does it suck, as an ending to that particular story? Too implausible? Too preachy?

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**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/23 "2006-01-15T19:03:22Z")

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> [@Jet Jaguar](#):
>
> **AI** was a good movie ruined by a horrible, tacked-on ending. It should’ve ended underwater.

How did the book end?

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**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/24 "2006-01-15T19:09:58Z")

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_The Godfather: Part III._ What a fucking abortion. In _The Godfather,_ at the end, Michael has his brother-in-law Carlo (who married his sister Connie in the opening scene, and for whose son Michael was standing godfather during the “Sicilian Vespers” massacre) executed. No choice – Carlo Betrayed the Family; it has the inevitability of a Greek tragedy. Ditto in _The Godfather: Part II,_ where he has his own brother Fredo whacked. But in _GFIII,_ Michael’s daughter Maria, who has already generated some good Greek-tragedy material by falling in love with her first cousin Vinnie, gets whacked **for no reason.** She just happens to be there when a hit man is gunning for Michael. It’s like, they couldn’t think of any meaningful ending, so let’s just kill off the least interesting character. Pah!

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**Author:** ![TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tellmei_mnotcrazy/32/3419_2.png) [@TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TellMeI_mNotCrazy)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/25 "2006-01-15T19:10:14Z")

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> [@BrainGlutton](#):
>
> The Superflu caused so much pain, oh!  
> And with evil a raging volcano  
> Flagg’s triumph seemed certain  
> Until King rang the curtain  
> By pulling a _Deus ex ano!_ :rolleyes:

Deus ex ano… that’s brilliant.

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**Author:** ![TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/51bf81/32.png) [@TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/26 "2006-01-15T19:18:16Z")

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> [@lonesome loser](#):
>
> I just watched this drivel.
> 
> [High Tension](http://imdb.com/title/tt0338095/)
> 
> Not into spoilers just avoid it. The ending comes from way beyond left field.

My favorite quote about the ending of _Haute Tension_ was from Ebert -

“The movie creates a plot hole big enough to drive a truck through, and then _literally drives a truck through it_.” 😃

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**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/27 "2006-01-15T19:33:22Z")

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> [@BrainGlutton](#):
>
> How did the book end?

It’s based on a short story, and being sort of a Kubrick movie, it doesn’t have much to do with the source material.

[Here’s the short story.](http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/5.01/ffsupertoys_pr.html)

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**Author:** ![PoorYorick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecccb3/32.png) [@PoorYorick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PoorYorick)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/28 "2006-01-15T19:34:04Z")

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> [@BoringDad](#):
>
> So how did the director’s cut end?

Among other differences in the movie, the director’s cut didn’t include the Hollywood ending in my spoiler. Instead:

After Deckard battles Battie on the rooftop, Gaff lands on the roof and says that Deckard did a great job but that Rachel doesn’t have long to live. Deckard returns home to find Rachel there, still alive. As they leave, Deckard finds a origami unicorn there, the meaning of which has been debated (was Deckard a replicant?).

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**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/29 "2006-01-15T19:35:14Z")

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> [@BrainGlutton](#):
>
> That’s depressing, but why does it suck, as an ending to that particular story? Too implausible? Too preachy?

Both, really. The film starts out like one of Cage’s typical odd-ball character films, you know, where his heart’s in the right place, even if he’s doing the wrong thing and then when Ian Holm gets shot the whole thing takes a hard left turn, and you’re wondering _why_ Cage’s character is doing what he’s doing. The lighter tone of the first part of the film evaporates, and then some _really_ implausible things start to happen (at least as far as Cage’s character goes), and then you get this seemingly tacked on ending, followed by the lecturing comments I mentioned in my first post. It would have made more senseFor Cage’s character to quit when either Ian Holm got killed or his brother was murdered. The film could have wrapped up in a more logical manner, and you could have gotten the “message” the final comments were trying to make, and it wouldn’t have seemed so damned bizarre. Up until Ian Holm gets killed, the film has a whole black comedy feel, like _Dr. Strangelove_, but once Ian Holm buys it, the sense of black comedy evaporates, and you just end up with crap, IMHO.

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**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/30 "2006-01-15T19:44:12Z")

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Harry Potter.

Set up a big nasty bad guy, build to the final confrontation, and the good guy wins by touching him?

Then old fart comes in to say that he never bothered before to mention good guy is invincible because him mom loved him.

Horrible, horrible stupid ending.

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**Author:** ![Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Speaker_for_the_Dead)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/31 "2006-01-15T19:55:44Z")

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> [@TellMeI'mNotCrazy](#):
>
> Deus ex ano… that’s brilliant.

I wholeheartedly agree. That was really funny. I’m giggling as I go to make myself tea.

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**Author:** ![Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c77e96/32.png) [@Speaker\_for\_the\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Speaker_for_the_Dead)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/32 "2006-01-15T20:02:23Z")

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:smack: And I just accidentally wrote a rhyming post.

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**Author:** ![middleman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9a140/32.png) [@middleman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/middleman)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/33 "2006-01-15T21:09:32Z")

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> [@Scruloose](#):
>
> Holden. His actions and decisions at the end of the movie were just painful to watch. Probably because, as I sometimes place myself in the shoes of the character, he took a tack that I would have avoided. IIRC\*, he had a chance to further his relationship with Alyssa, yet he just couldn’t let the whole ‘3-way thing’ go and made a bad decision because of it. That part just pissed me off for some reason.
> 
> It was a good movie overall; just the ending made me made.
> 
> \*It’s been a while since I’ve seen it, and I only saw it the one time, so my interpretation of events may be somewhat off.

It was uncomfortable to be sure, but I thought it was a bold ending.

They kind of tacked on a “sorta” happy ending and it tied up some threads.

That is by far my favorite of the Askew films.

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**Author:** ![koeeoaddi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/koeeoaddi/32/408_2.png) [@koeeoaddi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/koeeoaddi)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/34 "2006-01-15T21:18:30Z")

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> [@Speaker for the Dead](#):
>
> :smack: And I just accidentally wrote a rhyming post.

In that spirit:

\ ***The Ninth Gate** ’s ending really sucked.  
Words can’t describe how up it was …\*Sorry, I just can’t make that scan. But it really was a terrible ending.

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**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/35 "2006-01-15T21:36:02Z")

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> [@wolfman](#):
>
> Harry Potter.
> 
> Set up a big nasty bad guy, build to the final confrontation, and the good guy wins by touching him?
> 
> Then old fart comes in to say that he never bothered before to mention good guy is invincible because him mom loved him.
> 
> Horrible, horrible stupid ending.

And, if I recall, the bad guy had grabbed Harry just a few seconds before and hadn’t suffered any ill effects. Mom apparently didn’t love Harry THAT much.

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**Author:** ![Aeschines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aeschines/32/16251_2.png) [@Aeschines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aeschines)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/36 "2006-01-15T22:09:25Z")

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_The Matrix Revolutions_. I thought _Reloaded_ was brilliant and was just dying to see how all the conflicts and questions would be resolved.

All unresolved, horrible shit ending to a horrible shit movie.

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**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\
**Post date:** [January 15, 2006, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/37 "2006-01-15T22:15:44Z")

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I hated the ending of _Cold Mountain_. (I hadn’t read the book when I saw it- still haven’t all the way throught.) It’s a mixture of cliche and “yeah, right”. Among other things that bothered me:

[spoiler]Inman and Ada [Jude Law & Nicole Kidman] have a long passionate lovemaking scene the night he comes home. In real life, considering the day and week they’d had, both characters would have been filthy, freezing, hungry and smelly- I don’t think either would have felt much like licking the other.

Next up: Just because it’s a war movie doesn’t mean Inman has to die pointlessly. He would have been more than a match for the homeguard, who chances are wouldn’t have cared much less about deserters by that point because men were deserting the CSA by the thousands that late in the war- it would have been next to impossible for some old men and kids with guns to hold them off, plus this is the mountains where if you killed a man for deserting you’d better also kill the 5 brothers and 59 cousins he has or you’re a marked man yourself.

Next up: What is it that makes a doomed hero so hyper fertile? Nine months after the only time they make love and nine months after he dies heroically, Ada gives birth to his child, which of course lives. [I was so glad that \*Titanic\* didn’t pull this one.]

Also: Ruby & Stobrod and Georgia and kids are all seen sharing in the communal wonder of Ada’s farm. I somehow doubt that Ada, with a kid to raise herself, would allow them to share her house and land- some type of caretaker arrangement maybe, but…[/spoiler]  
**Addams Family Values** - I couldn’t believed they killed Debbie (Joan Cusack) for to me she would have made the _perfect_ addition to the family. I think that would have been a better ending.

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**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\
**Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/38 "2006-01-16T02:09:40Z")

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How did I forget _Psycho_. Great, great movie with a literally (in the literal sense) groan-inducing epilogue.

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**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\
**Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/39 "2006-01-16T02:27:01Z")

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> [@koeeoaddi](#):
>
> In that spirit:
> 
> \ ***The Ninth Gate** ’s ending really sucked.  
> Words can’t describe how up it was …\*Sorry, I just can’t make that scan. But it really was a terrible ending.

The _ **The Ninth Gate** _ had an ending? I thought they just ran out of money and decided to just release everything they filmed up to that point.

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**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\
**Post date:** [January 16, 2006, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-movie-whose-ending-sucketh-biggest/340058/40 "2006-01-16T02:50:29Z")

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> [@lonesome loser](#):
>
> I just watched this drivel.
> 
> [High Tension](http://imdb.com/title/tt0338095/)
> 
> Not into spoilers just avoid it. The ending comes from way beyond left field.

I was gonna come in this thread just to mention that movie. Then saw that you already had. hehe. But yes, the ending was horrible and made no sense whatsoever. What a waste of time it was watching that crap.

Russell

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