The MPSIMS Rest Home

You’re wondering about the somewhat unsteadily drawn line down the middle of the room?? Well, one day, old FairyChatMom - she’s the one in the ratty housecoat and worn-down slippers - got into a bit of a tiff with one of the other residents. She found a permanent marker and drew the line, declaring that her adversary was not to come on her side. Oddly enough, she can’t seem to remember which side is supposed to be hers, nor can she remember who she argued with or why.

Anyway, you can get on her good side by offering her chocolates - especially if they’re the good kind and not the cheap, waxy generic stuff. Just be sure to remind her to put in her teeth before eating them.

That tan gentleman over there, the one with the six foot blonde on his arm, that is Mr. Planner, the Administrator of the Home. After you’ve signed away the rights to your Social Security, your life’s savings, and any stocks, bonds, or securities you own, and we’ve harvested your organs for their value on the black market, he’ll be taking his monthly trip to Tahiit. He’s really a very, very nice man. Careful, don’t look directly at him. The glare from his Rolex has been known to blind people.