# The Mundane Pointless Laptop Shipping Story **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 11, 2014, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909 "2014-12-11T03:18:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![F.Pu-du-he-pa-as](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c89c15/32.png) [@F.Pu-du-he-pa-as](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.Pu-du-he-pa-as)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2014, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/1 "2014-12-11T03:18:52Z")
I ordered a laptop during the Black Friday sales. I was super excited, because finally, I would have a gaming laptop that would not give **oft wears hats** and **SenorBeef** and everyone else ample grounds to make fun of me. You know, one with an actual video card? It was supposed to ship in 1-3 days. Shortly thereafter, I got a notification that shipping had been delayed and the laptop probably wouldn’t arrive until after Christmas. Darn it, I had really been looking forward to playing with it, and now I’d have to wait until mid-January to get my hands on it. Then, I got a FedEx shipping notification! It didn’t say who it was from, but what else could it be other than the laptop, right? I couldn’t remember anything else that I’d ordered… Of course, I ran out and told everyone that my laptop was coming and we were going to have SO MUCH FUN playing all my games on it. Well. The next day, I realized that the shipping notification wasn’t for the laptop. No. Not at all. It was for beans. **Ten pounds** of beans. I know, I know! But I have a favorite kind of beans and they are delicious, so of course I have to order them in bulk every once in a while because you can’t find them in the grocery store. Doesn’t everyone? So not only am I **NOT** getting my laptop tomorrow, I now have to go back and tell THE ENTIRE WORLD that I couldn’t tell the difference between a laptop and a big bag of beans. And it had to be beans. Beans are just silly. How completely embarrassing. ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2014, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/2 "2014-12-11T03:40:45Z")
clearly you don’t know beans. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2014, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/3 "2014-12-11T03:48:18Z")
Guys, we are going to have SO MUCH FUN with ten pounds of beans! ---
**Author:** ![JohnGalt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johngalt/32/184_2.png) [@JohnGalt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnGalt)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2014, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/4 "2014-12-11T03:52:58Z")
So what’s your favorite kind of beans? And where can I order them from at ten pounds an order and get expedited delivery? (I’m looking for ideas for Christmas presents for my wife…) ---
**Author:** ![F.Pu-du-he-pa-as](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c89c15/32.png) [@F.Pu-du-he-pa-as](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.Pu-du-he-pa-as)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2014, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/5 "2014-12-11T20:30:03Z")
My favorite beans are Anasazi beans, which become inexplicably delicious with no additional seasoning. I ordered mine from North Bay Trading Co. ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2014, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/6 "2014-12-11T20:39:07Z")
There’s a “Lentil Inside” joke around here somewhere, but I can’t quite catch it. ETA: I looked up those beans, and I’m going to try them. ---
**Author:** ![F.Pu-du-he-pa-as](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c89c15/32.png) [@F.Pu-du-he-pa-as](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.Pu-du-he-pa-as)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2014, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/7 "2014-12-11T22:55:22Z")
I know! I should have everyone over for a beanbag toss! How awesome would that be? ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2014, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/8 "2014-12-11T23:34:39Z")
[**Campfire!**](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPIP9KXdmO0) > [@JohnGalt](#): > > So what’s your favorite kind of beans? And where can I order them from at ten pounds an order and get expedited delivery? (I’m looking for ideas for Christmas presents for my wife…) I don’t know your wife, but I’m thinking if you get her 10 lb of beans for Christmas she’ll be your _ex_-wife shortly thereafter. ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/9 "2014-12-14T00:33:46Z")
You’re full of beans, and so’s your old [del]man[/del]laptop. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/10 "2014-12-14T00:47:53Z")
> [@F.Pu-du-he-pa-as](#): > > So not only am I **NOT** getting my laptop tomorrow, I now have to go back and tell THE ENTIRE WORLD that I couldn’t tell the difference between a laptop and a big bag of beans. And it had to be beans. Beans are just silly. > > How completely embarrassing. > [@F.Pu-du-he-pa-as](#): > > I know! I should have everyone over for a beanbag toss! How awesome would that be? Just not near a widow, right…? “Fee…! Figh…! Tablet…! Phone…! Your LapTop Won’t Arrive By Drone…!” “Say…! You look a little like Gary Oldma-”\*\* _Squish!_\*\* ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/11 "2014-12-14T01:36:56Z")
My wife orders a few lb of beans every month. From a coffee roaster in Ottawa. And they are generally delivered the next day. ---
**Author:** ![Atomic\_Mama](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b5ac83/32.png) [@Atomic\_Mama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atomic_Mama)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/12 "2014-12-14T21:35:16Z")
Try http: / / www. ranchogordo .com … REALLY good beans, and lots of 'em! AND excellent customer service. We have 1 1/2 lbs. BEANS (cooked up already, in the fridge), about 6 lbs. addl. dry beans in the cupboard, and I mentioned to the spouse that I rilly SHOULD make some refried beans to go along with our turkey mole enchiladas 😃 He was not amused. But I thought it was a great idea :dubious: :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2014, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/13 "2014-12-15T22:10:23Z")
10 lbs of beans should be plenty to make a gaming abacus. ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2014, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/14 "2014-12-15T22:40:47Z")
Cool Beans! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2014, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/15 "2014-12-16T02:17:31Z")
Salsa can be good with beans. Salsa can also be good with chips. Computers have chips. You take bites of beans-containing foods. Computers also have bytes. And there’s a programming concept called Java beans. So I definitely understand your confusion 😃 I do suggest, however, that you don’t use the quick-soak method on the laptop. Overnight, and boil for several days, or you will never be able to chew it. And the legumes just have crappy wi-fi reception. ---
**Author:** ![Buttercup\_Smith](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/buttercup_smith/32/473_2.png) [@Buttercup\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buttercup_Smith)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2014, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/16 "2014-12-16T03:18:21Z")
I am intrigued by these beans. ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2014, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/17 "2014-12-16T14:52:54Z")
> [@F.Pu-du-he-pa-as](#): > > II ran out and told everyone that my laptop was coming and we were going to have SO MUCH FUN playing all my games on it. > > \ > > How completely embarrassing. I agree. ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2014, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/18 "2014-12-17T02:14:15Z")
Beans, beans, the magical fruit – The more you eat, the more you compute. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2014, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-mundane-pointless-laptop-shipping-story/706909/19 "2014-12-17T16:48:59Z")
The folks at North Bay Trading should send you a commission - I just ordered several packages of soup mix from them as a result of this thread. I will try to resist the temptation to throw in a few computer peripherals when I cook a batch of soup. I mean, a lot of them suggest you add meat but I don’t think a mouse (of either sort) would be well-received.