# The neverending Tiger Woods story **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 9, 2010, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482 "2010-04-09T01:45:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/21 "2010-04-09T16:27:38Z")
I dont like golf. I dont care about Tiger’s sexual antics. I am so freaking bored with that story. Isn’t there somebody missing somewhere in America or the world? Are there no conservatives blathering completely whacko stuff? And tax time … surely we have not had enough stories about the approach of tax time! The Woods story has made the media neglect their usual trite standbys! ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/22 "2010-04-09T16:42:40Z")
My favorite was a quote from some therapist talking about what a \*sensitive \*guy he is, so all the brouhaha might affect his game. God, it’s just so \*hard \*to be a world-famous millionaire sports star who gets caught red-handed fucking around! You don’t even _know!!!_ > [@Lamar\_Mundane](#): > > “Did she convert you when she said Jesus Christ! Oh my God!” That would be worth a month of outrage on right wing media. I think both are hilarious, personally. > [@Icerigger](#): > > Unfortunately the other day I came across the transcript of one of his “sexting” messages. I didn’t know what a romantic guy he was. […] What a class act. People can’t be into domination/humiliation/sadism and classy? ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/23 "2010-04-09T17:20:33Z")
Many words come to mind when I picture a woman being gagged by a shit-stained cock, but "classy’ is fairly far down the list. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/24 "2010-04-09T17:25:49Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Many words come to mind when I picture a woman being gagged by a shit-stained cock, but "classy’ is fairly far down the list. What if you promise to keep your pinkies out? ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/25 "2010-04-09T17:40:34Z")
I just don’t understand why it’s shocking to anyone that a young, good looking billionaire #1-in-the-world athlete would be sleeping around with hot cocktail waitresses. I’d be surprised if he wasn’t, personally. I can’t fathom why companies that largely cater to sports-playing men would _drop_ sponsorship of someone like that. They obviously don’t understand their target demographic at all. > [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > People can’t be into domination/humiliation/sadism and classy? Precisely. ---
**Author:** ![Corner\_Case](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/corner_case/32/234_2.png) [@Corner\_Case](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corner_Case)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/26 "2010-04-09T18:13:12Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > … tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger … TIGER, tiger, learning nigh, In the whores of the night, What immoral hand or eye Could frame thy fearful marketing? In what distant deeps or skeeves Burnt the fire of thine thighs? On what things dare he aspire? What the hand dare seize the fire? And what shoulder and what part Could twist the sinews around his heart? And when thy heart began to sweat, What dread hand and what dread feet? What he hammered? what kind of chains? In what furnace was thy brain? Where’s the advil? What breast grasp Dare its deadly terrors clasp? When the stars threw up their rears, And showered her with their leers, Did He smile His work to see? Did He who laid the glam make thee? Tiger, tiger, burning sight In the fortunes of the right, What immoral hand or I Dare frame thy fearful proclivity? ---
**Author:** ![Kolga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e56c9b/32.png) [@Kolga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolga)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/27 "2010-04-09T19:02:26Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger > [@Gyrate](#): > > Mushroom mushroom Llama llama llama llama llama llama duck. re: the OP - I’m pretty sick of hearing about the Tigerdrama, but it IS Masters week, so I expect to be bombarded. And there’s at least 3 BDSM jokes in that statement, if somebody wants to dig 'em out. ---
**Author:** ![cantara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6f9a4e/32.png) [@cantara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cantara)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/28 "2010-04-09T19:05:32Z")
I can’t beleive the interviews with people on the street who say they’ll tune in to the Masters because of the media spotlight when they otherwise wouldn’t. What are they expecting? To see if Tiger sleeps with someone on the course? And how could this possibly affect his game? He’s had some personal issues to deal with and hasn’t had sex with his wife (or presumably anyone) since this all broke loose. Yeah…tough to play golf after that. :rolleyes: I don’t blame him though, he’s been trained through the years to ‘play a round’. On almost every tee someone is yelling at him ‘GET IN THE HOLE!’. ---
**Author:** ![DiggitCamara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/df788c/32.png) [@DiggitCamara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiggitCamara)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/29 "2010-04-09T19:30:36Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > (snip) > > Tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger Tiger lovely spam tiger tiger Phil Mickelson tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger spam spam spam tiger Tom Watson tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam Tiger Woods is God Tiger Tiger Tiger > > (snip) Needs more badgers. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/30 "2010-04-09T19:34:07Z")
> [@Enderw24](#): > > What if you promise to keep your pinkies out? Well played, sir. ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/31 "2010-04-09T19:48:05Z")
This is odd. I can only guess someone messing around at the TSN.ca website and altered the Masters highlights video. At about 7 seconds in it says “Sex Addict? Yeah. right. sure. Me too” [http://img146.imageshack.us/img146/5264/tsncapture.jpg](http://img146.imageshack.us/img146/5264/tsncapture.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/32 "2010-04-09T20:26:44Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > Precisely. So what’s classy sex, then? I’m assuming only the kind \*you \*like to engage in. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/33 "2010-04-09T20:27:53Z")
> [@Vinyl Turnip](#): > > Many words come to mind when I picture a woman being gagged by a shit-stained cock, but "classy’ is fairly far down the list. However, if all we know about the aforesaid gagging is derived from _reading private and consensual communications that the sender didn’t intend anybody but the recipient to see,_ then its classiness or lack thereof is _none of our goddamned business._ If Tiger Woods were deliberately broadcasting his thoughts about shit-stained cocks in public “sexting” transcripts for anybody to see, I’d be the first to agree that that’s vulgar and disgusting and anything but classy. But if he merely sent them as private communications to a consenting partner, then we’re not entitled to make that judgement. In that case, we’re the vulgar and disgusting and not-classy ones for poking our dirty noses into somebody else’s private communications. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/34 "2010-04-09T20:51:31Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > …its classiness or lack thereof is _none_ of our goddamned business. Well then, shame shame SHAME on you for posting about it. Tiger is God and no alleged “sexting” as you call it can change the world’s opinion one iota, so there. Tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger Tiger tiger Tiger Tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger Tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger Tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger Tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger Tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger who’s Lee Westwood Tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger Tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger Tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger Montgomery Burns Tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger Tiger tiger tiger tiger Tiger! You da man. ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Bird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b3f665/32.png) [@Alan\_Bird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Bird)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/35 "2010-04-09T20:58:02Z")
> [@CarnalK](#): > > This is odd. I can only guess someone messing around at the TSN.ca website and altered the Masters highlights video. At about 7 seconds in it says “Sex Addict? Yeah. right. sure. Me too” > > [ImageShack - Best place for all of your image hosting and image sharing needs](http://img146.imageshack.us/img146/5264/tsncapture.jpg) According to TMZ, it was a second plane hired by the same people/person. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/36 "2010-04-09T21:26:00Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > If Tiger Woods were deliberately broadcasting his thoughts about shit-stained cocks in public “sexting” transcripts for anybody to see, I’d be the first to agree that that’s vulgar and disgusting and anything but classy. But if he merely sent them as private communications to a consenting partner, then we’re not entitled to make that judgement. Look, what Tiger does with his shit-stained cock in the privacy of his own… well, of somebody’s… home is none of my business. I just don’t want it shoved in my face. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/37 "2010-04-09T21:36:41Z")
I’m going to continue to privately smirk about the idea of someone who deliberately reads private, personal messages of an intimate nature that were not directed at them being the arbiter of what is and isn’t classy. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/38 "2010-04-09T21:43:55Z")
It would’ve been classier if \*\*Icerigger \*\*had used spoiler tags. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/39 "2010-04-09T21:47:52Z")
My comment was, in fact, directed more at \*\*Icerigger \*\*than at you, since he went to a page that’s explicitly billed as a transcript of the chats, versus just happening to be in a Tiger Woods thread. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2010, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482/40 "2010-04-09T21:56:04Z")
Yeah, I figured. And to be honest, I have no opinion on Tiger’s classiness or lack thereof and just enjoy repeating the phrase “shit-stained cock.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-neverending-tiger-woods-story/535482.md?page=3)