# The New Improved Re-release of Commercials I Hate! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 24, 2009, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788 "2009-11-24T16:40:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Runestar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/74df32/32.png) [@Runestar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Runestar)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/41 "2009-11-25T16:57:04Z")
Right now, **any** of the auto company commercials that imply you should be purchasing one of their vehicles as someone’s Christmas present. Every year, more and more of the car companies seem to be jumping on this bandwagon. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/42 "2009-11-25T17:03:13Z")
> [@Sweetums](#): > > I know I must be in the minority, but I can’t hit the mute button fast enough when any of the Howie Long car commercials come on. Plus, he has cop hair. (I love that line, just comes right out of left field.) The ad for Pam Cooking Spray with the little brats at the birthday party, pounding the table and yelling “Re-do, re-do!” when the hostess comes out with the mangled cupcakes. ---
**Author:** ![Speak\_to\_me\_Maddie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Speak\_to\_me\_Maddie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Speak_to_me_Maddie)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/43 "2009-11-25T17:16:51Z")
There is a commerical for some cosmetics featuring Sara Jessica Parker. I don’t know what brand or product it is. She is so airbrushed in this commerical that she ends up looking literally like a cartoon. It is as if she is rotoscoped. Or more like someone took a peach crayon and colored over the film. It’s just laughable. It is so terrible looking and obvious that it could only serve to hurt the product, since whatever it is isn’t good enough to hide Parker’s ugly oldness. It literally looks like a cartoon drawing of SJB superimposed on a real background. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/44 "2009-11-25T17:22:22Z")
**ivn the pit boss** does have a point in this case. There’s a perfectly serviceable [commercial hate thread over in the Café](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=539254). ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/45 "2009-11-25T17:24:40Z")
> [@Lute Skywatcher](#): > > **ivn the pit boss** does have a point in this case. There’s a perfectly serviceable [commercial hate thread over in the Café](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=539254). That’s for _irrational_ dislike. My hate for the commercial in the OP is entirely rational. ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/46 "2009-11-25T17:25:25Z")
> [@Runestar](#): > > Right now, **any** of the auto company commercials that imply you should be purchasing one of their vehicles as someone’s Christmas present. Every year, more and more of the car companies seem to be jumping on this bandwagon. They’ve been doing that a long time, actually…I have a couple of old print ads(one from the late teens, the other from the early twenties) that encourage purchasing a car as a “family” Christmas gift. Of course, the concept of the giant bow had yet to be invented… Drug ads have gotten worse too. There’s one really disturbing one that consists of various people talking right into the camera (all you see is a close-up of the lower part of their faces); a couple see fit to belch. Eww. At least the drug name pronunciations are funny; there’s one that sounds like “toby-ass”, and another that sounds like “ass-effects”. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/47 "2009-11-25T18:29:36Z")
> [@Abby\_Emma\_Sasha](#): > > I’m sorry, but what is the lie exactly? Animals do get abused and shelters are full of them. Can you elaborate? Every penny someone gives to a shelter is another penny curlybitch isn’t potentially a recipient of. She finds that highly offensive. Basically, she’s a like a con man who is too lazy to do the actual conning part. > [@Sweetums](#): > > I know I must be in the minority, but I can’t hit the mute button fast enough when any of the Howie Long car commercials come on. > > ``` > He comes off as a condescending. self satisfied asshole, and really doesn't make me want to buy a car from him. Of course, from some of the commercials they used to run for hummers, "douchebags buy our cars" seems to be a selling point. So perhaps that's the demographic they are shooting for. > > ``` Well, sure, but he’s an ex-football player who wears GLASSES! That makes him smart and trustworthy! -Joe ---
**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/48 "2009-11-25T18:52:52Z")
[quote=“Wile\_E, post:5, topic:518788”] There’s a Disney commercial where they play the Small World song, if I can’t get to the mute button quick enough I have to cover my ears and sing “la la la” or the earworm will eat my brains. QUOTE] Duff Beer for me, Duff Beer for you, I’ll have a Duff, you have one too! ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/49 "2009-11-25T19:41:50Z")
Any commercial where someone sings a slogan that would be just as effective spoken. And the stupid ones that make no sense. There’s one for a pizza. The pizza is so loaded that the guy holding it falls through the floor. First, the pizza is only four pounds. Second, you could only sell one before you’d have to close up and repair the floor. Sometimes I take things too literally, I guess. But one made me laugh yesterday. A klutzy guy comes home and tells his wife he found a job. He’s falling and stumbling over everything. “What’s the job?” “Demolition”. “You’ll be in the office?” “No, I’ll be using nitroglycerin!” She goes to her computer and searches for what – body armor? Crash helmets? Nope. Life insurance. 😃 I **hate** the sarcastic droning guy who does the burger ad – I think it’s for Hardee’s. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/50 "2009-11-25T20:02:59Z")
“Futon world! blah blah blah blah at Futon World! blah blah blah blah Futon World! We love shouting Futon World! It’s what we do for fun! Come down to Futon World! so we can shout at you some more! Futon World! Futon World!” And I don’t even watch TV, it’s just that the computer is in the same room. Grrr. I’ll be coming to FUTON WORLD!, all right- to slash up your stupid futons with razor blades. ---
**Author:** ![Rack-a-Bones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rack-a-Bones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rack-a-Bones)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/51 "2009-11-25T21:12:28Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > 800-588-2300 Empire > > Today! > > I get all stabby. Gaaaa. I got stabby just reading that. How about “Why buy a mattress any place else?” ---
**Author:** ![MitzeKatze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ad7895/32.png) [@MitzeKatze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MitzeKatze)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/52 "2009-11-25T21:39:57Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > The National Humane Society ad. Damn thing runs for-freaking-ever, has this tear jerking music over a montage of maimed or otherwise abused animals. Nobody wants to see that shit, especially not half a dozen times during a ball game, or several times duing a non-football program. It does not make me want to send them money. It makes me change the channel and harbor ill will towards them. > [@jayjay](#): > > Is that the Sarah MacLachlan one? I can’t take that. I leave the room. I can change the channel now within the first two notes of the music- and it is awful. I have to cover my own eyes to do it so that I don’t accidentally get a glimpse- some of those images have haunted me… That is probably what they are going for as far as sympathy and haunting imagery etc. but it is having far from the desired effect I think, at least in my household. Not only do I turn the channel, but since the commercial is so long I end up never turning it back, so whatever show I was watching just no longer exists for me. More than that, it is rare that I will turn back to that channel within the same evening (having gotten interested in something else during the hour-long cry fest of SPCA commercials) so not only is the program losing viewers but the entire station is. I am pretty sure that is not how commercials are supposed to work for a television company. That said, I am sensitive to the plight of homeless, abandoned, abused, and injured animals. I have been donating to the SPCA my entire life along with animal related causes. I do not need the extra guilt and sob stories, especially when the animals that “star” in those commercials are no longer in need having been rescued or euthanized by now; the latter making me feel even sadder and more helpless. There are ways to rally the community and get people involved without resorting to this kind of emotional blackmail. ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/53 "2009-11-26T01:56:26Z")
> [@Abby\_Emma\_Sasha](#): > > I’m sorry, but what is the lie exactly? Animals do get abused and shelters are full of them. Can you elaborate? The lie is that the HSUS does anything about it. Unless things have changed _very_ recently, they don’t have any shelters and spend their money on things that PETA wants. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/54 "2009-11-26T02:13:35Z")
Those commercials with the store mannequins instead of people. Old Navy maybe? Very annoying. ---
**Author:** ![Maiira](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f04885/32.png) [@Maiira](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maiira)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/55 "2009-11-26T02:25:00Z")
> [@AuntiePam](#): > > And the stupid ones that make no sense. There’s one for a pizza. The pizza is so loaded that the guy holding it falls through the floor. First, the pizza is only four pounds. Second, you could only sell one before you’d have to close up and repair the floor. Sometimes I take things too literally, I guess. I hate one that’s similar: it shows a guy cutting up a pizza, and then the pizza falls through the floor to the apartment below, where the two morons who live there start eating it, saying stupid shit like “don’t come down here, we’re naked!” If that were me, I’d be going down there myself and taking a hammer to their ballsacks. You do NOT deny me my pizza and then be an asshole about it. Ever. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/56 "2009-11-26T02:32:28Z")
> [@Khadaji](#): > > Those commercials with the store mannequins instead of people. Old Navy maybe? > > Very annoying. Yes, the Old Navy Supermodelquins. Ick. ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/57 "2009-11-26T07:04:14Z")
773-202-luuuuuuuuuunnnaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa That comercial makes stabby. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/58 "2009-11-26T11:19:16Z")
> [@Gyrate](#): > > I’m taking you down, **Gillette**. > > The ad (shown in the UK): A man is seen at various points shaving with, or attempting to purchase razor blades for, his Gillette Mach 3 razor. At each stage he is assaulted by a golf/tennis/soccer ball (as appropriate) launched by Tiger Woods, Roger Federer or Thierry Henry. At the end, all three hit him at once and laugh. I’ve just discovered a version with [Derek Jeter](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8-bOSEfFWk) instead of Thierry Henry (Jeter looks suspiciously CGI’d in). Great - so they’ve hired _four_ of the most expensive sportsmen in the world for these commercials. Nice. At least they left off the collective beating at the end of this version. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/59 "2009-11-26T11:52:53Z")
> [@BiblioCat](#): > > You should feel honored that he made an appearance. I’m going to start a weak Pit thread specifically so he will show up. Best part of not living in LA anymore (aside from no longer living in traffic) is I never have to hear those goddamned “You’re killing me, Larry!” commercials anymore. _MY GODS, THOSE FUCKING COMMERCIALS MAKE ME WANT TO BURN SHIT!_ I hate them so much. I always go to sleep with the TV or a fan on (need white noise), and there is nothing worse than being awakened by that shit. If it got late, I would make a point of turning to a non-local channel so that there was no chance of me having to hear it accidentally, or worst of all, it infiltrating my dreams. ---
**Author:** ![tumbleddown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@tumbleddown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tumbleddown)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2009, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788/60 "2009-11-26T12:06:23Z")
> [@Pine\_Fresh\_Scent](#): > > Son closes door, puts towel on floor, sits on towel with his back to the tub, takes out an iPhone and starts watching a sitcom. Actually it’s some sort of little handheld Watchman style TV thing. It’s kind of sweet until you realize that you can buy an 19" flatscreen HDTV for the same price. My most hated commercial right now would be any ad for Viagra or Cialis or anything in any way involving penises. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-improved-re-release-of-commercials-i-hate/518788.md?page=4)