# The NEW SDMB government! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 21, 2000, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045 "2000-11-21T00:02:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![dpr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8797f3/32.png) [@dpr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dpr)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/1 "2000-11-21T00:02:50Z")
My government will largely be chosen at random so most people get a turn at being held responsible. It will be a rule characterised by individual responsibility (slogan: As You Wish) – leaning towards a benevolent dictatorship sort of thing. But until the first semi-random drawing I have to name an interim government. Those of you chosen have an awesome burden to bear. Not only will you continue to post but your names are now linked to this administration. **Vice President:** We needed someone cool. Someone respected. Someone who had similar tastes to me. Someone who would also not use it in a sig line constantly. Someone who – if things went badly for me – would save me with their reputation alone. So the new VP is… \*\* Demo!! \*\* \*\*Secretary of Defence: \*\*Spoofe \*\*Secretary of DeOtherFence: \*\*Jester \*\*Minister for Foreign Affairs: \*\*Wyldelf (because to most of you she’s foreign and she wants some affairs) \*\*Head of the Secret Police: \*\*Coldfire. Chief duty: to organise the crack quick response team that will ensure peace and safety on the boards. This team will have the power to edit and forcefully evict errant threads. Their name? The Moderators! \*\*Minister for Trade: \*\*Odie who gets to be held responsible for online auctions \*\*Minister for Communication: \*\* The two most able to collect data… Silverfire and Falcon: our very own chat addicts. **Male Minister for Flirting:** Dry. Hey the man’s got a gift. \*\*Ministers of Compassion: \*\*It’s a big job so we need two big-hearted people and they don’t come any warmer than Scotticher and Purplebear **Minister of Addictions:** Doob! **Minister for Hunting Snarks:** sandyr **Minister of Lurkers:** Rift **Minister for Sexuality (sure to be hotly contested later):** Hamadryad **Minister for sci-fi:** Smeghead **IPU liaison:** Gaudere I can’t decide whether to make Nymysys the female minister in charge of flirting or just my PA… Assistants to the ministers include: ssskuggiii and hypergirl Second Couple: Satan and DrainBead More positions to be announced at a later date. Submissions and suggestions will be heard on this thread at regular intervals. Lobbying for positions will require submissions outlining your suitability and why we should waiver the random nature of the selection process. Your humble, duly-elected deity dpr ---
**Author:** ![Demo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demo/32/8472_2.png) [@Demo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Demo)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/2 "2000-11-21T00:07:48Z")
Whoa! Cool? Respected? How cool is that? Thanks mate! I’ll do my best. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![deb2world](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7cd45c/32.png) [@deb2world](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deb2world)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/3 "2000-11-21T00:09:03Z")
See if I ever start a thread announcing your presidential win again. You could have at least made me (ad)minister of A-R posting. ::deb takes ball under arm and goes home:: ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/4 "2000-11-21T00:11:25Z")
I’m in?! I’m part of the SDMB government? WOOHOO!!! ---
**Author:** ![Simetra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Simetra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simetra)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/5 "2000-11-21T00:16:34Z")
I probably don’t have the most experience, but if you need an Air Force, I’m your man. I’ll need a field commission as I’m only an A1C. Lieutenant General will do. I don’t need to be a full General or anything. If someone else is better fit for command, speak up now. **Dpr** , I think we can be Board-Wide Deployable in one week. ---
**Author:** ![Monster104](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Monster104](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monster104)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/6 "2000-11-21T00:22:49Z")
**Dpr** …what the hell? You forgot about me!! All those kickba…er…“donations” to your funds, and what do I get in return? …But yet I see you don’t have a head for an intelligence agency. I’m not that intelligent, but I read a lot of Tom Clancy spy stuff. I could pull it off. So how about it, old buddy old pal?? ---
**Author:** ![dpr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8797f3/32.png) [@dpr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dpr)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/7 "2000-11-21T00:31:25Z")
_sigh_ Never let it be said that I don’t listen to the whinings of my constituents… Actually, I had deb2world in my draft copy so I don’t know what happened there, and I thought of you monster. It’s just I didn’t know what you’d like to do. So I’m appointing deb2world a supreme court judge because she was reasonably fair and unbiased but sitll had an opinion and Monster can have the CIA to play with. Armed Forces? OK you talked me into it. Air Force: Simetra Navy: ChiefScott Army: ??? ---
**Author:** ![Ad\_Noctum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b19c9b/32.png) [@Ad\_Noctum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ad_Noctum)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/8 "2000-11-21T00:36:38Z")
_Exasperated sigh_ Slumps away ---
**Author:** ![deb2world](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7cd45c/32.png) [@deb2world](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deb2world)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/9 "2000-11-21T00:39:22Z")
Whine, me? I haven’t even had cheese at all today. I am a supreme court judge, boy o boy and I don’t even have to go to law school or take the bar. Oh by the way, you are forgiven since you say I was in the draft copy. Here is the ball back. ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/10 "2000-11-21T00:40:53Z")
Can I be the head of the _People’s Revolutionary Front_? ---
**Author:** ![nashiitashii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@nashiitashii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nashiitashii)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/11 "2000-11-21T00:41:36Z")
Kewl kewl. So I’m an _ass_istant? 😃 😃 😃 ---
**Author:** ![sk8rixtx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/858c86/32.png) [@sk8rixtx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sk8rixtx)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/12 "2000-11-21T00:52:00Z")
I’m waaaaaiiiting. I’m looking for a new job. C’mon. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/13 "2000-11-21T00:57:00Z")
May I be Minister of European History? Just for kicks? ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/14 "2000-11-21T01:03:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by adam yax \* > **Can I be the head of the _People’s Revolutionary Front_?** The PRF? Feh. Now, the **Revolutionary Front of the People** , that’s another thing 😉 Thanks dpr! Secret Police. Coolness! ---
**Author:** ![Silo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Silo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silo)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/15 "2000-11-21T01:03:37Z")
hey what’s my job? ---
**Author:** ![wyldelf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/4491bb/32.png) [@wyldelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wyldelf)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/16 "2000-11-21T01:04:02Z")
Wow - Thanks DPR - Minister for Foreign Affairs? Awesome!! You can be assured that as part of this prestigous government body I hereby promise to actively seek to expand our currently dismal statistics in the foreign affairs department. 😃😃 MMMM - I think the budget needs to be increased though!! Do I get a travel allowance? It’s just that I was thinking my first stop on the road to searching for some foreign affairs could be… ::consults the magic 8-ball:: **Canada**. Anyone out there looking for a Foreign Affair in Canada? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![oldscratch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ed655f/32.png) [@oldscratch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/oldscratch)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/17 "2000-11-21T01:04:43Z")
I want to be the minister of after-parties. can I can I? ---
**Author:** ![Doobieous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@Doobieous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doobieous)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/18 "2000-11-21T01:07:08Z")
Well, even though the name decieves thee, I shall bring honour and prestige to my position in office. I am proud to be a part of our dear DPR’s government, and hope that as Minister of Addictions, I do my job well. Thank you, you really like me, you really like me! ---
**Author:** ![Bear\_Nenno](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bear_nenno/32/3358_2.png) [@Bear\_Nenno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bear_Nenno)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/19 "2000-11-21T01:19:44Z")
I will head up the Militia!! We are all training on a compound somewhere, just waiting for the guv’ment to take our guns away or infringe upon our civil rights!! (Oh, and we are also prepared to fight the Queen if she tries to invade us again!) Who’s with me?!? ---
**Author:** ![Monster104](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Monster104](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monster104)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2000, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045/20 "2000-11-21T01:21:46Z")
Woohoo! I’m Director of Central Intelligence (DCI for short). First job of mine: Find out what those damn Canadians are _ **really** _ up to! Then after that is to find out the secret ingredients in secret sauce. Ooh…what’s this? Spy satellites? Lets see what kind of resolution these things get…Wowza! That babe is a babe! 😃 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-new-sdmb-government/42045.md?page=2)