# The oddest posters **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 27, 2016, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038 "2016-07-27T16:12:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Wilson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/96bed5/32.png) [@Wilson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wilson)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2016, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/81 "2016-07-28T22:01:44Z")
A lot of the classic ones have been mentioned, but let’s not forget **Kel Varnsen - Latex Division** , author of the classic [Would you shoot child and kill your child in this situation?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=289696). ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2016, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/82 "2016-07-28T22:42:19Z")
Who was the secret agent with a busted caps lock key? **NoClueBoy** was an odd one. Genius. Sexy as hell. But odd. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2016, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/83 "2016-07-28T22:45:06Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > But performing DRE’s is a lot worse. I do my job in human form, fortunately. I only transmogrify if there’s a significant security threat. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2016, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/84 "2016-07-28T22:45:17Z")
> [@Frank](#): > > [Here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=324485) 'tis. Shat On Cookie! That brings back memories. ---
**Author:** ![erysichthon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d07c76/32.png) [@erysichthon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erysichthon)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2016, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/85 "2016-07-28T22:52:06Z")
I have so many favorite odd posters that I don’t know where to begin. The guy who insisted that “same-sex marriage” didn’t exist because DICTIONARY. The woman who had evidently never heard of commas, and complained that people shunned her because of her superior intellect. The guy who argued strenuously that the line from Allan Sherman’s “Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah” about the coach reading from “something called Ulysses” couldn’t possibly be a James Joyce reference. As I recall, one of his arguments was that the coach would have been severely disciplined—perhaps even terminated!—for reading a Joyce novel to children. The woman who casually took a bite out of a wasp nest. The bus driver with the hot Mexican wife and a deep, abiding disgust for people with “learned helplessness.” No links because it’s hot here and I’m tired. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2016, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/86 "2016-07-28T23:04:50Z")
The one chick who claimed to be [JFK’s secret love child](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=405187) because of numerology. She even has a [book](https://www.amazon.com/Code-Name-Apollo-Kennedy-Legacy/dp/1432742027?ie=UTF8&qid=1313609704&ref_=sr_1_2&sr=8-2) out. The dude who wanted to go scuba diving in a swamp so he could get a pet alligator and kept dismissing the claims that it was dangerous. ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2016, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/87 "2016-07-28T23:17:39Z")
> [@G0sp3l](#): > > I’m a young’un here but the weirdo I remember most is > > James Otto Sweet Heart > > God bless you always!!! [Dude!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=19511954&postcount=63) 🙂 🙂 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Fluffy\_PickleSniffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/77aa72/32.png) [@Fluffy\_PickleSniffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fluffy_PickleSniffer)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2016, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/88 "2016-07-28T23:24:09Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > I do my job in human form, fortunately. I only transmogrify if there’s a significant security threat. Wait, wait, wait - stop the thread for a minute! You have a _ **transmogrifier!?!** _ :eek: …can I… um… borrow it? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2016, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/89 "2016-07-28T23:33:28Z")
> [@Snarky\_Kong](#): > > Equating a handshake and rape is pretty weird. Right, and she is still here. The other disheveled posters mentioned at some point pushed their junk filled shopping carts to the next street corner. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2016, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/90 "2016-07-28T23:39:08Z")
> [@orangeapples](#): > > "Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the beast > > For it is a human number > > Its number is six hundred and…seventy two…" I don’t think that means what you think it means. ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2016, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/91 "2016-07-28T23:58:19Z")
Early on, there was SECRET AGENT (SECRETAGENT?) who typed in all caps, (because his sooper secrit internet connection device would not transmit lower case letters). He often explained “politics” in terms established by his secret connections and tried to threaten a couple of posters, either for exposing him or being too far on the wrong side of his politics. His name might have been lost in the UBB to VB conversion, by which time he was already gone. I do not remember whether it was Phaedrus or a different troll who went on and on about how the American Indians were the world’s smartest people because Asians were smarter than Africans and Europeans and North American Indians were the most advanced Asians. I do recall that when he left in a huff, he posted a wall of text in what he claimed was a Lakota dialect, then claimed that he was going to post it in a different language, but simply posted the same text in italics. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/92 "2016-07-29T00:01:47Z")
> [@Fluffy\_PickleSniffer](#): > > You have a _ **transmogrifier!?!** _ :eek: No, I can transmogrify. It’s an inherent ability for most Mercotans. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/93 "2016-07-29T00:07:44Z")
So If I have something I need transmogrified (say, a pancake turner that I need transmogrified into an ice cream scoop), and you were holding it when you transmogrified, would you be able to get me an ice cream scoop out of the deal? ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/94 "2016-07-29T00:41:44Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > So If I have something I need transmogrified (say, a pancake turner that I need transmogrified into an ice cream scoop), and you were holding it when you transmogrified, would you be able to get me an ice cream scoop out of the deal? Yeah, if you don’t mind a neutronium ice cream scoop. Great for if the ice cream is really, really hard, but only stable if your local gravity field is really, really strong. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/95 "2016-07-29T01:08:16Z")
C’mon, somebody else remembers the Grapist, right? ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/96 "2016-07-29T01:10:04Z")
I was going to respond with “ **Robot Arm** , Post #69” but you ruined it. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/97 "2016-07-29T01:13:16Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > The dude who wanted to go scuba diving in a swamp so he could get a pet alligator and kept dismissing the claims that it was dangerous. Has this guy posted lately? ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/98 "2016-07-29T01:15:33Z")
> [@Battle\_Pope](#): > > So… > > Has anyone here ever herd of the singer [James Otto](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=674018)? > > God bless you and **James** always!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂 Oh please, JOSH infests another board where I post. I try to stay out of the fora JOSH is usually seen in. > [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > C’mon, somebody else remembers the Grapist, right? > [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > C’mon, somebody else remembers the Grapist, right? I despised them for making “punny” jokes about a disgusting crime. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/99 "2016-07-29T01:50:25Z")
There was \*\*jetblast \*\*and his reason-free and fact-free obsession with the shootdown of TWA 800. The guy could make up a new theory about anything, and by the time of his departure had worked practically the entire world population into the conspiracy. Nothing could dent that shield. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2016, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038/100 "2016-07-29T01:55:02Z")
> [@Baker](#): > > I despised them for making “punny” jokes about a disgusting crime. Punsters cannot help it. They are sick. “He who would pun would pick a pocket.” -Doctor Samuel Johnson [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oddest-posters/761038.md?page=6)