# The Official SDMB Hijack Thread

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-official-sdmb-hijack-thread/130147>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [September 29, 2002, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-official-sdmb-hijack-thread/130147 "2002-09-29T21:27:09Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 8\
**Page:** 5

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**Author:** ![New\_Improved\_Scott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f17d59/32.png) [@New\_Improved\_Scott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/New_Improved_Scott)\
**Post date:** [October 7, 2002, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-official-sdmb-hijack-thread/130147/81 "2002-10-07T02:14:44Z")

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[http://planetcybertron.com/script.html](http://planetcybertron.com/script.html)

The entire script!

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**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\
**Post date:** [October 7, 2002, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-official-sdmb-hijack-thread/130147/82 "2002-10-07T11:18:42Z")

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Eloise Sharp, who has already borne 14 kids, stands in front of her husband; she wears, as usual, a sheer nightie; he’s in pajamas and has the usual facial blush and weak knees he’s always had in her presence; he’s always considered her wonderful, beautiful, and sexy, and to him in this regard her bulging belly doesn’t change that: the pretty face; the lush head of dark brown hair; the graceful outlines of her body; the large breasts, with big dark nipples, showing through her nightie.  
In her plain but mellifluous voice she says, “Jack, this is my fifteenth child, and I think it’s time I retired my womb. So from now on we just screw for fun.” 🙂 😉

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**Author:** ![Kn\_ckers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/96bed5/32.png) [@Kn\_ckers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kn_ckers)\
**Post date:** [October 7, 2002, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-official-sdmb-hijack-thread/130147/83 "2002-10-07T14:10:28Z")

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That’s as may be, but I have two very important things to add:

Important Thing #1: There are pigeons in my air conditioner. Well, not my personal air conditioner - that’s pigeon-free. But the one next to my desk at work. It’s weird. I can hear them talk to me. The pigeons, that is, not the air conditioners.

Important Thing #2: The Patriots REALLY need to get their asses back in gear. They spent too many years losing to get back into THAT mold again. C’mon, boys! Howsabout no more inteceptions, Tommy, Sweetie?

Tom Brady’s hot.

Love, Kn(what’s so bad about non-sequitur?)ckers

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**Author:** ![apotheosis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ba8739/32.png) [@apotheosis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/apotheosis)\
**Post date:** [October 7, 2002, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-official-sdmb-hijack-thread/130147/84 "2002-10-07T14:25:26Z")

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Ugh. Cold coffee.

Nothin’s bad about them. I have nothing against them. Some of my best friends are non-sequiturs.

if (\* = ‘a’) {  
‘Kn_ckers’ = ‘verb’;  
}  
else {  
'Kn_ckers’ = ‘noun’  
}

er…

"Kn_ckers" = (_ == “a”) ? “verb” : “noun”;

_“chix0rs dig pseudocode,” he said. But he never gets laid, so why do I listen to him?_

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**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2002, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-official-sdmb-hijack-thread/130147/85 "2002-10-08T14:02:03Z")

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I ate krispy kreme doughnuts yesterday. They’re pretty good.

I finally snaffled VNV Nation’s new album, _Futureperfect_, from Ro. I’d listen to it on my way to work, but my headphones are broken.

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**Author:** ![domesticatedjunglefowl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b38774/32.png) [@domesticatedjunglefowl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/domesticatedjunglefowl)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2002, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-official-sdmb-hijack-thread/130147/86 "2002-10-08T17:35:41Z")

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charles shaw wine for 2.99 a bottle. i’ve become a wino.

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**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2002, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-official-sdmb-hijack-thread/130147/87 "2002-10-08T20:26:36Z")

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If you drank tea, would you be a teo?  
If you drank Coke would you be a cocoa? 😃

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**Author:** ![I\_can\_t\_believe\_that\_s\_butter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@I\_can\_t\_believe\_that\_s\_butter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_can_t_believe_that_s_butter)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2002, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-official-sdmb-hijack-thread/130147/88 "2002-10-08T21:07:28Z")

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HAHAHAHAHAHA look at the funny pinsat this site

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