# The oldest jokes in the world **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 31, 2008, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405 "2008-07-31T20:27:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2008, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/1 "2008-07-31T20:27:56Z")
[News article](http://uk.reuters.com/article/domesticNews/idUKL129052420080731): > [@](#): > > The world’s oldest recorded joke has been traced back to 1900 BC and suggests that toilet humor was as popular with the ancients as it is today. > > It is a saying of the Sumerians, who lived in what is now southern Iraq and goes: “Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman did not fart in her husband’s lap.” Ha ha ha! Ha ha. Ha. … Ha? There’s a link in the article to a site where the full Top Ten Oldest Jokes list can be found, but I’m unable to unearth said information. ---
**Author:** ![freekalette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/50afbb/32.png) [@freekalette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freekalette)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2008, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/2 "2008-07-31T21:22:14Z")
I just did a search on the site for “oldest jokes”, and the article came up. FTR, the one you quoted just struck some sort of absurd-bone in me, and I laughed hysterically for a good minute or so. _shrug_ ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2008, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/3 "2008-07-31T22:26:38Z")
Desmond “The Naked Ape” Morris used to host a television documentary series in which he said the world’s most ancient rude gesture was putting your hands palm-out in front of you and then shoving them towards the other person in a pantomime of “I’m shoving excrement at you”. He didn’t give his source or argumentation for this, but it does involve a sort of potty humor. I think the next oldest jokes is probably > [@](#): > > Offended prude: Well I never! > > Smartass: That explains it! or references to a “1920 BCE style death ray [from the gods]”. I’m trying to think of anything from the OT that might be seen as jocular in nature, but I’m coming up empty handed. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2008, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/4 "2008-07-31T22:35:30Z")
[QUOTE=Sampiro] I’m trying to think of anything from the OT that might be seen as jocular in nature, but I’m coming up empty handed. [/QUOTE] Am I my brother’s keeper? ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2008, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/5 "2008-07-31T22:36:44Z")
This whole “humor” thing obviously needed work. Several centuries’ worth actually. ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2008, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/6 "2008-07-31T23:50:42Z")
[QUOTE=Sampiro] I’m trying to think of anything from the OT that might be seen as jocular in nature, but I’m coming up empty handed. [/QUOTE] What the hell, I’ll pull this one out of the vault: [“Pull my finger”](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:God2-Sistine_Chapel.png) ---
**Author:** ![Apocalypso](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@Apocalypso](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apocalypso)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2008, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/7 "2008-08-01T03:17:10Z")
“Yeah, I found my \_\_\_\_. It was in the last place I looked.” “Well OF COURSE it was in the last place you looked. You don’t keep looking once it’s been found.” yuk yuk yuk :rolleyes: I actually saw Jeff Foxworthy doing this joke on television once. What, did you trip on your way to the stage, hit your head, and forget all your jokes? His regular material sucks too, but at least it’s not 80 years old. ---
**Author:** ![SpectBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a87d85/32.png) [@SpectBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpectBrain)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2008, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/8 "2008-08-01T03:33:57Z")
Well since prostitution is called the oldest profession I bet jokes about it soon followed. I don’t know the setup but the punch line could have been: You paid 5 drachmas!? I only paid three, got change and also got my feet washed. ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2008, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/9 "2008-08-01T04:10:15Z")
No, the oldest prostitution joke is also the oldest “your mama” joke. Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2008, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/10 "2008-08-01T04:23:24Z")
“Look, I know I told you to slice open your son, but I was _joking_!!..” ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2008, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/11 "2008-08-01T14:12:29Z")
[Adam]“Stand back! I don’t know how big this thing gets!”[/Adam] ---
**Author:** ![JSexton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/96bed5/32.png) [@JSexton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JSexton)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2008, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/12 "2008-08-01T17:44:56Z")
“Five rupees, same as in town!” ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2008, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-oldest-jokes-in-the-world/458405/13 "2008-08-01T17:52:46Z")
“Why dire wolf cross path?” “Not know. Why?” “Eat Thag.” “Uh. Not get.” “Then shit out Thag.” “Ha ha ha!”