# The one true religion. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 8, 2003, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717 "2003-12-08T07:15:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/42 "2003-12-09T03:11:40Z")
There is no one true religion, of course. There are however, many, many **many** _false_ religions. **Hydro** , if you’re right, I’d rather take Hell, 'cause I wouldn’t want to be in what you call Heaven. ---
**Author:** ![drm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e57/32.png) [@drm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drm)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/43 "2003-12-09T03:19:15Z")
I’ve been thinking recently. Say I’m wrong in my religious belief (I’m not really here to talk about what mine is, I’m sorry), and there does happen to be a heaven and a hell. I’m pretty sure I’d want hell. The reason being, in heaven you have some dude watching every damn thing you do, who needs that. I bet you could get away with so much shit in hell, I bet it’s fun. ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/44 "2003-12-09T03:19:16Z")
Dunno about no religions. But I know the one true church: The First House Of Polyester Worship And Horizontal Throbbing Teenage Desire, Our Lady Of The White Go-Go Boot, Lord Of The 40-Watt Undulating Bubbling Lava Lamp, Apocalyptic, No Pizza Take Out After 12 Shrine Of The Rasslin’ Jesus Achey Breaky Love Tabernacle. A-mayun. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/45 "2003-12-09T03:30:15Z")
I am a neo-Druid. We believe in elves, fairies and various other spirits. The king spirit, our main Deity, is short and elderly with a beard. This spirit lives under bridges and eats goats. We believe it is our duty to never, ever feed our Diety. You shouldn’t either. 😃 Haj ---
**Author:** ![Ale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@Ale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ale)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/46 "2003-12-09T04:13:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by andros \* > \*\*Dunno about no religions. But I know the one true church: > > The First House Of Polyester Worship And Horizontal Throbbing Teenage Desire, Our Lady Of The White Go-Go Boot, Lord Of The 40-Watt Undulating Bubbling Lava Lamp, Apocalyptic, No Pizza Take Out After 12 Shrine Of The Rasslin’ Jesus Achey Breaky Love Tabernacle. \*\* Orthodox or Reformist? 😃 Anyway; folks let´s take the chance to tell Hydrocortisone how much we don´t appreciate him, for, as things are going this poster will soon be no more. ---
**Author:** ![Ale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@Ale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ale)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/47 "2003-12-09T04:20:11Z")
Ahh… one more thing: > [@](#): > > _by Hydrocortisone_In your opinion what is the one true religion? I say Christianity and that all others will burn in Hell for all time. But that is just my opinion. And in the Orwellian [Sould we adopt my system of government for America?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=222855&perpage=50&pagenumber=1) > [@](#): > > _by Hydrocortisone_Religion will be removed. This guy is great, first proposes a goverment that would make Hitler and Stalin go pale; then to top it condems everyone to Hell. Can you just **feel** his love? Can I use the word “troll”? Can we forget about this pimple? ---
**Author:** ![Mac\_Guffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Mac\_Guffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mac_Guffin)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/48 "2003-12-09T04:21:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by andros \* > \*\*Dunno about no religions. But I know the one true church: > > The First House Of Polyester Worship And Horizontal Throbbing Teenage Desire, Our Lady Of The White Go-Go Boot, Lord Of The 40-Watt Undulating Bubbling Lava Lamp, Apocalyptic, No Pizza Take Out After 12 Shrine Of The Rasslin’ Jesus Achey Breaky Love Tabernacle. > > A-mayun. \*\* Your beliefs interest me and I would like to sign up for your newsletter. ---
**Author:** ![Raymond\_Luxury\_Yacht](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raymond_luxury_yacht/32/4099_2.png) [@Raymond\_Luxury\_Yacht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raymond_Luxury_Yacht)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/49 "2003-12-09T04:22:15Z")
From [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid4297513#post4297513), courtesy of **Hydrocortisone** : > [@](#): > > Can you provide links to treads I started and never posted to again? Comments? ---
**Author:** ![Bruce\_Daddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Bruce\_Daddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bruce_Daddy)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/50 "2003-12-09T05:38:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jehovah68 \* > \*\*From [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid4297513#post4297513), courtesy of **Hydrocortisone** : > Comments? \*\* Musta got axed. No worky. ---
**Author:** ![Denis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5e9695/32.png) [@Denis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Denis)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/51 "2003-12-09T05:41:32Z")
I worship my cats. ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/52 "2003-12-09T05:51:28Z")
My god’s breath smells like ambrosia. ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/53 "2003-12-09T05:56:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by drm \* > \*\*I’ve been thinking recently. Say I’m wrong in my religious belief (I’m not really here to talk about what mine is, I’m sorry), and there does happen to be a heaven and a hell. I’m pretty sure I’d want hell. The reason being, in heaven you have some dude watching every damn thing you do, who needs that. I bet you could get away with so much shit in hell, I bet it’s fun. \*\* I’ve always thought that hell would be more fun. If Heaven is full of fundies, why on EARTH would you want to go there? ---
**Author:** ![heresiarch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/278dde/32.png) [@heresiarch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/heresiarch)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/54 "2003-12-09T06:02:29Z")
God loves irony. For instance, sometimes the side effects of a drug are exactly the same as the symptoms that a drug is supposed to relieve. According to [rxlist](http://www.rxlist.com/cgi/generic3/hc25_ad.htm), side effects of hydrocortisone are “burning, itching, irritation, dryness, folliculitis, hypertrichosis, acneiform eruptions, hypopigmentation, perioral dermatitis, allergic contact dermatitis, maceration of the skin, secondary infection, skin atrophy, striae and miliaria.” ---
**Author:** ![Raymond\_Luxury\_Yacht](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raymond_luxury_yacht/32/4099_2.png) [@Raymond\_Luxury\_Yacht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raymond_Luxury_Yacht)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/55 "2003-12-09T06:05:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bruce\_Daddy \* > \*\*Musta got axed. No worky. \*\* Sorry about that. Here it is again: [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=4297513#post4297513](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=4297513#post4297513) Both **Munch** and **Revtim** called out our friend for trolling - a charge which he denied with: > [@](#): > > Can you provide links to treads I started and never posted to again? So, **Hydro** , there’s this one, plus [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=227905](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=227905). ---
**Author:** ![Ryle\_Dup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Ryle\_Dup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ryle_Dup)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/56 "2003-12-09T06:11:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dooku \* > \*\*Search this guy’s posts, and you’ll realize what the purpose of this thread is. > > I’ll give you a hint: Starts with “T”, ends with “L”, rhymes with 'hole. \*\* toll? ---
**Author:** ![drm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e57/32.png) [@drm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drm)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/57 "2003-12-09T06:12:00Z")
> [@](#): > > _originally posted by GMRyujin_ > **I’ve always thought that hell would be more fun. If Heaven is full of fundies, why on EARTH would you want to go there?** My only problem would be that I have fair skin so I’d burn rather easily. Maybe that’s something that you build a tolerance to? If that’s the case, no worries then 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/58 "2003-12-09T06:42:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by cmkeller \* > \*\*Kyla: > > We don’t? > > While it’s true that we Jews believe it’s possible to be a good person while not being Jewish, it’s news to me if we don’t consider the other religious beliefs to be mistaken. \*\* Mmmm… well, _I_ don’t believe it, or rather, I don’t really think about it. Judaism is for Jews and other people have their own religions. If we think we’re the only correct ones, why don’t we proseltyze? I wish this weren’t in the Pit now, everything always comes out extra abrasive in the Pit. **cmkeller** , I have only the utmost respect for you and your opinions, but I’m Reform and you’re Orthodox, so it’s hardly a shock that we don’t agree on everything. Cheers. ---
**Author:** ![Ms2001](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ms2001/32/18463_2.png) [@Ms2001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms2001)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 10:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/59 "2003-12-09T10:36:15Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Ale_ > **Anyway; folks let´s take the chance to tell Hydrocortisone how much we don´t appreciate him, for, as things are going this poster will soon be no more.** I think [this guy](http://hansprestige.com/pics/foh.jpg) said it best… (not safe for church) ---
**Author:** ![Epimetheus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c4cdca/32.png) [@Epimetheus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Epimetheus)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/60 "2003-12-09T13:13:05Z")
Unitarianism? (ducks and runs) ---
**Author:** ![TVAA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c57346/32.png) [@TVAA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVAA)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2003, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717/61 "2003-12-09T13:46:57Z")
There is only one logic, and it has no prophets. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-one-true-religion/217717.md?page=4)