# The Other Baby Bird Thread **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 2, 2003, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091 "2003-06-02T08:10:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/1 "2003-06-02T08:10:08Z")
The reason why this isn’t a General Question is because you’re gonna want to flame me for being a fucking idiot. So you might as well do it here. I can’t excuse myself for what I did, so I’ll just tell the story. On May 18, I was ill. I got hit by this nasty little virus or something that flashed through my circle of friends. It laid me low for but a day, then I was back to the grind. That day, I awoke from my torpor several times to a scrabbling sound at the window beside my bed. Sometime in the early afternoon, I checked to see what it was. It was a pair of beautiful [morning doves](http://www.turtle-tracks.org/issue47/i47_9.html) making a nest in my window sill. See, the problem is, as much as I like nature and shit, my better half also likes air conditioning, and my window unit has to go on that window sill here soon if this shitty weather will ever decide to bypass spring and decide it’s now summer. Hell, my woman _requires_ it. She’s from Minnesota, Lord help her. I think she sleeps on icebergs back at home, when she’s not pillaging other villages from her open boat. So the love-birds had to go. So I opened the window, shooed the birds away, and tossed the nest off the window sill. I’d like to blame the fever, but no, I’m really just a heartless asshole. Here’s the thing I didn’t expect: _nature has a way of fucking with you_. Just like women. When I mentioned the horrible thing I did to the birds, well, I was told in no uncertain terms by Ms. Viking that… I’m an asshole. And lo and behold, so did nature. The birds came back. The next morning, we awoke to much scrabbling, and jaunty tail-feathers poking into my room through the blinds. Those damned birds were here to stay. Unfortunately, not before an egg was lain. It rolled into the window sill and it’s utterly fucked. But somehow, those damned birds cobbled together _another_ nest, and plopped two more eggs there. Worse, I kept startling the poor bird (it looks like Daddy has flown the coop) by turning the lights on, having alarms go off, adjusting the blinds, throwing parties, and I must admit, peeping at it, because I’m starting to take a liking to it. The bird spent a lot of time away from the nest. But it’s still there. So look, I _know_ I’m an asshole, and I can’t see a metaphor when it waves its very ass in my bedroom. But I want to know this very badly: _What is the nesting period for a dove?_ It’s been two weeks. Hell, at this point, I _look forward_ to huffing my Viking’s second-hand cigarette smoke while watching her swelter, all the while listening to the _wee-wee-wee_ of little baby birds get a crap-ass start on life, probably well before I normally wake up. So when, in the words of this incurable romantic, are the little fuckers gonna hatch, and how soon will they be gone if I didn’t kill 'em already? ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Nader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Darth\_Nader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Nader)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 10:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/2 "2003-06-02T10:10:54Z")
This seems as good as any a place to mention the bird that’s been driving us nuts for the last month. I’m guessing it’s a woodpecker or orieole, and fairly pretty, what with it’s brilliant yellow chest and all. Said bird is in the habit of swooping from the building next door and banging into a window here maybe 60-70 times a day. At first, we thought it was a nesting/territorial thing. But lately, it’s started attacking FROSTED windows and also plain old siding. BAM! BAMBAMBAMBAM!! We’re amazed it’s not dead yet. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 10:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/3 "2003-06-02T10:11:09Z")
You scumbaggish, callous arsehole!! That’s NATURE you’re harrassing there ya know! 😃 😃 I have no idea when the little fuckers are going to hatch…good luck! When you get the low-down on avian-homicide, can you give me a clue too, 'cos the little bastards that wake me up in the wee hours need a good euthanasing as well. ---
**Author:** ![Ice\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 10:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/4 "2003-06-02T10:29:43Z")
Looks like you’ve got to [at least August](http://msucares.com/wildfish/wildlife/dove_breeding.html) to learn to love your little bit of close-to-home nature, there, **Sofa King**. And if bird song wakes you up in the wee small hours, **kambuckta** – you must have light sleeping patterns. ---
**Author:** ![Essured](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Essured](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Essured)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 10:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/5 "2003-06-02T10:35:03Z")
Apparently the eggs take [13-14 days](http://www.mbr-pwrc.usgs.gov/id/framlst/Lifehistory/lh3160.html) to incubate. The chicks take [url=“[http://www.buteo.com/ptreyes/modo-l.html](http://www.buteo.com/ptreyes/modo-l.html)”]12-14 days to fly. So you’ve got at least a month of doves on your window sill. 🙂 Take some pretty pics. ---
**Author:** ![Essured](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Essured](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Essured)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 10:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/6 "2003-06-02T10:36:06Z")
[Fixed second link.](http://www.buteo.com/ptreyes/modo-l.html) Sorry. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/7 "2003-06-02T12:09:18Z")
I want my baby bird, baby bird, baby bird, baby bird I want my baby bird, baby bird, baby bird, baby bird Chili’s… ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/8 "2003-06-02T12:36:29Z")
Don’t sweat it. It’ll go fast. We had a pair of robins nest on the balcony of our first apartment once. We had a little tree out there and one day we woke up and there they were, effectively placing the balcony off limits. But in no time at all the eggs were hatchlings and the hatchlings were gone. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/9 "2003-06-02T12:54:23Z")
Well, doves are quite common and you’re not exactly driving them to extinction. Also, they can build nests pretty fast, as you’ve observed. In nature, doves who locate their nests in hazardous places don’t get to pass their genes along. But that’s just to make you feel better. I like doves. I love the sound of their call. My cat dragged in a dead baby bird the other day. ugh. I think it probably had fallen from a nest or something. Now we have a morning dove hanging out in our yard. I hope it’ll be ok there, but if not, them’s the breaks. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/10 "2003-06-02T13:54:24Z")
Obviously It’s too late for this year but next you might put a stuffed hawk or blow-up owl there in the sill. Heh, considering your plight, I’m going to leave any hawk/dove comments alone. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/11 "2003-06-02T15:28:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sofa King \* > **…as much as I like nature and shit…** I like nature too, it’s all the shit I that have a problem with. ---
**Author:** ![monica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a183cd/32.png) [@monica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monica)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/12 "2003-06-03T01:46:57Z")
Post pictures! Please! ---
**Author:** ![RadioWave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/91b2a8/32.png) [@RadioWave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RadioWave)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/13 "2003-06-03T02:14:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sofa King \* > **But somehow, those damned birds cobbled together _another_ nest, and plopped two more eggs there.** Around here, we call them things “omelets”. Seriously, you should hook up a web cam so the rest of us can join in the wonder that is nature. Or eat them. Either way. ---
**Author:** ![Darwins\_Finch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darwins_finch/32/20304_2.png) [@Darwins\_Finch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darwins_Finch)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/14 "2003-06-03T05:23:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sofa King \* > **It was a pair of beautiful [morning doves](http://www.turtle-tracks.org/issue47/i47_9.html) making a nest in my window sill.** Psssst: it’s [_mourning_ dove](http://birds.cornell.edu/BOW/MOUDOV/). Pass it on. ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/15 "2003-06-03T05:43:57Z")
> [@](#): > > Psssst: it’s mourning dove. Pass it on. Probably pining over that first egg. ---
**Author:** ![Br\_er\_Lapin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e79b87/32.png) [@Br\_er\_Lapin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Br_er_Lapin)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/16 "2003-06-03T05:49:44Z")
I’m convinced that mourning doves are freaks of nature and perhaps they deserve it. I’ve heard their call almost every day of my life, and yet I have NEVER seen one of the things. Weird. ---
**Author:** ![Lissa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lissa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissa)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/17 "2003-06-03T14:08:20Z")
I once had a barn swallow build its nest on the underhang of my front porch. You haven’t experienced a pain-in-the-ass until you’ve been repeatedly dive-bombed by an angry Momma Bird who pulls your hair on each swoop as you fumble for your keys. Then when the Little Darlings hatched, they kept their nest clean by pooping over the side onto my porch. I hated those damn things, but was too soft-hearted to remove them. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/18 "2003-06-03T14:33:11Z")
The three offspring of our Carolina Wren pair departed their hanging basket nest by our back door yesterday. They provided us with a fair amount of entertainment as they attempted a Rube Goldbergish series of escalations to gain passage to the River Birch limbs where their parents were calling from. They’d start off on the planters and ardesia a foot off the ground, find perch on the grill momentarily until they realized other birds (storebought) were being cooked within, get stuck on the side of an unscalable pine fence, advance to the upper nandina branches and finally reach the Birch, all with multiple plummets to the ground interspersed. Watching them then sit there and pant, all the while wearing their little hairfeather earmuffs provided us with a measurable amount of mirth. Good on ya, Spring! ---
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/19 "2003-06-03T16:02:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Darwin’s Finch \* > \*\*Psssst: it’s [_mourning_ dove](http://birds.cornell.edu/BOW/MOUDOV/). Pass it on. \*\* The Finch knows his boids… Today or tomorrow ought to be hatching day, if the other two eggs aren’t as addled as the first. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2003, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091/20 "2003-06-03T16:35:50Z")
don’t want to depress you or anything, but. a board came loose on an overhanging porch roof on my business office some time back. Birds started nesting there. We got rid of the nest and nailed the board back. they managed to get it loose again. replay two more times. we finally nailed the thing **SHUT** w/industrial type nails. They chipped a hole through. :eek: I guess they like that spot. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-baby-bird-thread/179091.md?page=2)