# The Other Shoe is dead. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 5, 2013, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047 "2013-09-05T02:41:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 11
**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/201 "2013-09-06T04:16:18Z")
Purple, this is terrible and made worse by all you have already been through. Know that our thoughts and prayers are with you and that we are here for you. If you need something, anything… just ask. {{{Purple}}} ---
**Author:** ![BobArrgh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobarrgh/32/2881_2.png) [@BobArrgh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobArrgh)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/202 "2013-09-06T05:04:09Z")
**Purple** , I am so sorry to hear about your loss. My heart is broken for you. ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/203 "2013-09-06T06:55:36Z")
The SDMB biker gang: Some Damn Motherfuckin’ Badasses. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/204 "2013-09-06T07:26:45Z")
I’m so sorry for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![Chanteuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de053/32.png) [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 7:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/205 "2013-09-06T07:54:39Z")
I am SO terribly sorry for your loss. Words just can’t express it. ☹ I know it’s hard, but try not to feel guilty–I can’t imagine that anyone could have done more for him over the last months than you did. You neither neglected, nor abandoned him. And don’t worry about the tears that haven’t come yet. We Dopers will cry for you until the day comes that you can cry for yourself–and then we will weep with you. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 9:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/206 "2013-09-06T09:18:36Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > I’m dreading the memorial: just puttering around the house putting away his things leaves me numb & quiet, but as soon as I’m on the phone with someone I’m a weepy mess. Dealing with people in person face-to-face, seeing his photo on an easel with flowers: that’s gonna be a shit-ton worse. But what kind of wife would I be to skip my own husband’s memorial? One in mourning… you wouldn’t be the first, nor the last. If it willl help your mourning, go; if it won’t, don’t. ---
**Author:** ![Sodalite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@Sodalite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sodalite)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/207 "2013-09-06T09:38:52Z")
I’m so very sorry for your loss. I enjoyed reading your posts about his recovery while I was in the hospital earlier this year. It felt good to read about someone getting better who was so much worse off than I was. It helped me feel less negative about my own situation and I’m grateful to you for giving me hope. Thank you so much for sharing your story with this faceless internet person. **((((((purplehorseshoe))))))** ---
**Author:** ![Silence\_Lenore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e56c9b/32.png) [@Silence\_Lenore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silence_Lenore)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/208 "2013-09-06T11:30:23Z")
I am so sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Fool\_in\_the\_Rain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8491ac/32.png) [@Fool\_in\_the\_Rain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fool_in_the_Rain)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/209 "2013-09-06T12:55:21Z")
My eyes teared up when I saw the thread title. I didn’t comment in the other thread, but I followed it and hoped and prayed for the best. Thoughts, prayers and hugs **{{{purplehorseshoe}}}** ---
**Author:** ![slightly\_askew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d07c76/32.png) [@slightly\_askew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slightly_askew)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/210 "2013-09-06T13:22:33Z")
I am so sorry for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![BetsQ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/fbc32d/32.png) [@BetsQ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BetsQ)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/211 "2013-09-06T15:13:31Z")
I’m so, so sorry to hear this. ---
**Author:** ![KinkiNipponTourist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e9bcb4/32.png) [@KinkiNipponTourist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KinkiNipponTourist)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/212 "2013-09-06T15:38:17Z")
Oh purplehorseshoe, I am so so sorry. I can’t think of anything to say that hasn’t already been said. As you can see, your thread touched many of us. Thank you for sharing your story, and I’m so so sorry that you didn’t get the happy ending that you both so richly deserve. ---
**Author:** ![heater2000ca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/50afbb/32.png) [@heater2000ca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/heater2000ca)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/213 "2013-09-06T15:46:55Z")
Just a lurker, but I wanted to let you know that your threads about Johnny have touched so many of us - more than you even knew! Like everyone else, I was shocked to see this thread title - I was so hoping that you guys were through the hardest part. I’m not real good with condolences, and everyone else has said it much better than I ever could. Know that we’re with you in spirit, and I hope you’ll let us be there with you through all the up’s and down’s of the next few weeks, months, years. ---
**Author:** ![Das\_Glasperlenspiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/das_glasperlenspiel/32/2944_2.png) [@Das\_Glasperlenspiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Das_Glasperlenspiel)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/214 "2013-09-06T16:09:50Z")
Requiem aeternam dona eis, et lux perpetua luceat eis. Grant him eternal peace and may light perpetual shine upon him. Purple Horseshoe - I am so sorry for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![Clockwork\_Jackal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b5e925/32.png) [@Clockwork\_Jackal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clockwork_Jackal)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/215 "2013-09-06T16:18:33Z")
Purplehorseshoe, I am so so sorry for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/216 "2013-09-06T16:37:07Z")
> [@Rick](#): > > Black humor is a coping mechanism. It can be very healthy to get it out and use it. > We are here for you. Talked with a friend of mine earlier today who asked, “is there anything at all you need? Nt to be crass, but, do you need money?” Me: “well, not to be crass, but I have one fewer mouth to feed.” She: :eek: I’m glad I thought to pull his wedding ring off his stiff dead hand. It’s sitting on the coffee table in front of me. Doesn’t fit any of my fingers properly, but I keep picking it up and fiddling with it anyway. Oh, and thanks for the PMs. I doubt I’ll respond to everyone individually, at least not right away, but the support is appreciated. ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/217 "2013-09-06T16:41:51Z")
Don’t lose that ring. You could put it on a chain and wear it around your neck. I am so glad you are still able to make with the black humor. Don’t ever stop. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/218 "2013-09-06T16:42:05Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Doesn’t fit any of my fingers properly, but I keep picking it up and fiddling with it anyway. My grandmother wears Grandpa’s on a chain around her neck. She says it was a snap decision to keep it rather than bury it with him, but she’s glad she made it every time she touches it. Sometimes the small things are more comfort than the large ones. ---
**Author:** ![Snickers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Snickers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snickers)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/219 "2013-09-06T16:53:42Z")
Jesus, what a horrible thing. You’re in my thoughts - all my best. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047/220 "2013-09-06T18:29:11Z")
> [@kayT](#): > > Don’t lose that ring. You could put it on a chain and wear it around your neck… Seconded! Or at some point you could have the gold melted down / reshaped into something you _can_ wear. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047.md?page=10) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-other-shoe-is-dead/668047.md?page=12)