# The perfect Christmas present for. . . . well, an idiot I guess

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [November 25, 2012, 7:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049 "2012-11-25T07:14:26Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 17\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2012, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/41 "2012-11-27T15:30:02Z")

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I want one of these:  
[http://pinterest.com/pin/279434351849159093/](http://pinterest.com/pin/279434351849159093/)

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**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2012, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/42 "2012-11-27T16:41:24Z")

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> [@AaronX](#):
>
> [http://www.ilenesmachine.com/images\_blog/handsfree\_small.jpg](http://www.ilenesmachine.com/images_blog/handsfree_small.jpg) ?

WANT!

mandatory lower case text

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**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2012, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/43 "2012-11-27T16:44:33Z")

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> [@April\_R](#):
>
> This  
> [Amazon.com: Eggstractor, White : Home & Kitchen](http://www.amazon.com/Eggstractor-Easter-Egg-Peeler/dp/B000OGY97K)

> [@Leaper](#):
>
> Wow, I Pitted that thing [way back in 2004!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=245581) You mean they’re STILL selling it? I’d have thought it’d have gone the way of the dinosaurs by now!
> 
> My opinion of Western civilization sinks even more. 😛

It’s a little unclear. I noticed that the page is offering to allow me to “sign up to be notified when this item becomes available.”

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**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2012, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/44 "2012-11-27T16:57:18Z")

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> [@Pai325](#):
>
> I saw that a while ago on think geek, and immediately wanted one. Sometimes I want both my hands free when I talk. Also, my android phone is so boxy and I have small hands, so it’s difficult to hold. It’s easy to cradle something like that in your neck while you work, but if the sound quality is bad I guess I will pass.

Using the speakerphone not an option because of where you are? I have a hard time imagining putting up with the pain-in-the-neck of an old-school handset rather than just setting the phone down and using it in speakerphone mode.

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**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2012, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/45 "2012-11-27T17:22:25Z")

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> [@April\_R](#):
>
> This  
> [Amazon.com: Eggstractor, White : Home & Kitchen](http://www.amazon.com/Eggstractor-Easter-Egg-Peeler/dp/B000OGY97K)

Hee. I was just thinking about Bridget Jones’s mom demoing something like this – “Mind the overspray!”

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**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2012, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/46 "2012-11-27T18:22:10Z")

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I saw an ad on TV recently for some gadget that looked like a small printer that you connected to your phone line, or cell phone, or something… so when little Billy sends a text to grandma or grandpa, they can read a printout of the message instead of having to navigate that newfangled cell phone thingy in order to read it. (I tried to find this thing on the As Seen On TV site but didn’t see it.)

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**Author:** ![doorhinge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a5b964/32.png) [@doorhinge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doorhinge)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2012, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/47 "2012-11-27T18:31:13Z")

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> [@Larry\_Mudd](#):
>
> Using the speakerphone not an option because of where you are? I have a hard time imagining putting up with the pain-in-the-neck of an old-school handset rather than just setting the phone down and using it in speakerphone mode.

Personally, I find “speakerphone mode” to be the most annoying feature of cellphones. I’m amazed at the number of people who think that their phone calls must be so important that everyone else should be forced to listen to them.

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**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2012, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/48 "2012-11-27T21:06:55Z")

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> [@Spiderman](#):
>
> Consider yourself whooshed. I can buy [this](http://www.westcoastmall.net/jabra-c150-universal-hands-free-corded-cell-phone-headset-with-25mm-jack-p-8565.html?osCsid=e8fdb78b299e2fb2e2a77d0571d1cdb5) for even less than the old-fashioned home-phone handset in the OP. It’s hands free, & it’s smaller so it will fit in my pocket when not on the phone. So why would I want the handset in the OP, excluding novelty purposes?

Well, 1) the gigantic handset eliminates the problem of people thinking you are a dangerous schizophrenic when you suddenly start talking REALLY LOUDLY TO NO ONE while staring at them on public transportaion or in line or at the urinal!

1. Bluetooth devices almost immediately became synonymous with “douchebag” 😃

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**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2012, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/49 "2012-11-27T22:06:15Z")

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> [@Larry\_Mudd](#):
>
> Using the speakerphone not an option because of where you are? I have a hard time imagining putting up with the pain-in-the-neck of an old-school handset rather than just setting the phone down and using it in speakerphone mode.

Have you asked an honest person if they can hear half of what you’re saying when you’re on speakerphone? I have, and they can’t. And I can’t hear half of what they’re saying.

And Bluetooth hurts my poor widdle ears. Can’t wear earbuds, either. Apparently my ear canals are stupid shaped.

Poor me. ☹

😃

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**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\
**Post date:** [November 27, 2012, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/50 "2012-11-27T22:20:38Z")

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> [@WhyNot](#):
>
> Have you asked an honest person if they can hear half of what you’re saying when you’re on speakerphone? I have, and they can’t. And I can’t hear half of what they’re saying.
> 
> And Bluetooth hurts my poor widdle ears. Can’t wear earbuds, either. Apparently my ear canals are stupid shaped.
> 
> Poor me. ☹
> 
> 😃

Yeah, unfortunately speakerphones generally sound shit. I use it now and then momentarily while my hands are occupied, but they’re no good for longer calls, which is what you really want them for.

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**Author:** ![Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e47c2d/32.png) [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hershele_Ostropoler)\
**Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/51 "2012-11-28T00:44:35Z")

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> [@doorhinge](#):
>
> Personally, I find “speakerphone mode” to be the most annoying feature of cellphones. I’m amazed at the number of people who think that their phone calls must be so important that everyone else should be forced to listen to them.

I’ve done it, when I have to press a lot of buttons (and so need to see the keypad, or “keypad”) and when I’m the only one in the room, and often the apartment.

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**Author:** ![SandyHook](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dec6dc/32.png) [@SandyHook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SandyHook)\
**Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/52 "2012-11-28T01:54:20Z")

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> [@Taomist](#):
>
> In my opinion, the product in the OP wouldn’t be complete without [this.](http://blog.modernmechanix.com/telephone-holder-is-curved-to-fit-contour-of-shoulder/) With THIS, it’s alllll good.

Add [this](http://www.airdesks.com/?gclid=CKCpjJvG8LMCFYp_QgodwEgAbQ) little goodie and I think we have a can’t miss combo. Perfect for those on the go.

I especially liked how it makes using your compter so much easier when driving.

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**Author:** ![D-bear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@D-bear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D-bear)\
**Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/53 "2012-11-28T06:23:19Z")

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I thought [this would be](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jlSF0dtDRD8) the perfect gift for an idiot…

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**Author:** ![kath94](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/67e7ee/32.png) [@kath94](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kath94)\
**Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/54 "2012-11-28T17:56:12Z")

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> [@WhyNot](#):
>
> I want one. Just 'cause. And 'cause I hate the Bluetooth thingy and speakerphone is the Devil’s own tool, but I often need both hands free to flip through a file while on the phone.
> 
> Here’s my nomination (surprise, it’s also from As Seen on TV): [http://www.asseenontv.com/smore-to-love-smore-maker/detail.php?p=360246&v=kitchen\_knives-and-gadgets](http://www.asseenontv.com/smore-to-love-smore-maker/detail.php?p=360246&v=kitchen_knives-and-gadgets) Seriously? We’re rebranding fish baskets as “S’Mores Makers” now? And entirely ruining the S’Mores in the process.
> 
> Any girl scout knows the key to a S’Mores is a perfectly (to be defined by the end user) browned and carmelized marshmallow, which this contraption makes impossible, and just the right ratio of solid to melted chocolate and the temperature variance between the cool graham cracker and oozy melty innards. This thing makes the worst S’Mores ever, but at least it makes lots of them at once and in an _oven_, so the kids needn’t bother with the boring sitting around a campfire roasting marshmallows part of S’Mores making…oh, wait, that’s the FUN part, isn’t it?
> 
> This gadget actively offends me. 😉

I followed the link and found that the product is ACTUALLY SOLD OUT! \<shudder!\>

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**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\
**Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/55 "2012-11-28T18:00:34Z")

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> [@TokyoBayer](#):
>
> That site is fun. I just [found this](http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/e86a/), which is a good solution for people who can’t use chop sticks.

So’s a fork.

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**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\
**Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/56 "2012-11-28T18:48:20Z")

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> [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](#):
>
> My friend’s idiot husband wants this board game for idiots: [Cashflow 101](http://www.amazon.com/Rich-Dad-Cashflow-board-game/dp/B002LGDASK/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1353871594&sr=8-1&keywords=cash+flow+game). It’s a copycat of Monopoly, but playing it is supposed to educate you in the mysterious ways of finance so you too can become a bazillionaire.

I’ve played that game. It’s nothing like Monopoly. More like playing Life, except with a much starker contrast between good and bad life choices. You either get to be a real estate magnate or a wage slave. No real in-between.

It’s not a great game because you don’t actually get to make some of your important life decisions. You’re are the whim of the cards. And all of the real estate ventures pay absurdly high rates of return. But, again, nothing like Monopoly. Monopoly is at its heart a trading game. Cashflow is more like a financial planning simulation where you don’t get to drive for a lot of it.

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**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\
**Post date:** [November 28, 2012, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-christmas-present-for-well-an-idiot-i-guess/642049/57 "2012-11-28T20:37:16Z")

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> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#):
>
> Last week I saw a Middle Eastern lady driving along, talking on her cellphone with the phone tucked up into her hijab.

I see this all the time, especially in the grocery. Muslim women got it ALL figured out! 😃

Also, I love that air desk. Look at the vase of flowers on one of the levels.

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